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Title: AM6 Run-2 tolgaocal80's Journal
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#1
Now I will do Run-2 of AM6

starting on 10.11.19
9 days first run

but I want to ask some questions about usage patterns and stages, if anyone who did run AM 2 times or one, answer I will be very gratefull, thank you.

I am dreaming very sexual and, not caring about sexual shames after finished stage 6, it had been almost one week,
before stage 6 I just dreamt about friendliness with girls. is there anyone respond like this to stage 6?
 is stage 6 contains some things about this subject? I am dreaming too much with this sub, I will make a detailed dream list for Run 2.

I think, I will try ultrasonic this time, what is your suggestions? first one was Ocean masked, 12-13 hours.
I think I am maybe a bit strong willed type, but I wanna try this time ultrasonic, please suggestions about this?
AM6-RUN1-(04.2019)---AM6-RUN2-(11.2019)

Back-to-back AM6.

I am determined to live the life I want.
 
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#2
The last few stages, I think 5 and 6 have a bit of a leadin to SM, so it makes sense you'd have dreams ilke that.

Whatever format you can do consistently is fine, good job doing ocean surf for so many hours especially while sleeping. I'm not sure I could, I used ultrasonic. Also you want to be able to keep the hours pretty consistent between stages, because for example if you did like 20 hours a day in stage 1 then dropped down to 10 it would be unbalanced.
 
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#3
Yes I did it when sleeping or awake both Ocean Surf, about 12-13 hours everyday, I read some journals about this discussion, I remember Masked sounds on low volume effecting subconsious more deeper than ultrasonic, I guess I will again do that

So new usage patterns for Run-2 is:

Ocean Surf Masked 12 hours day, 8 hours night and 4 hours day
Thank you Ben for answer

And one question:
Some types of girls attracted to me in past exactly before using AM, this types were who got divorced parents or girls not raised by their parents, and what I observe is that kind of girls are not attracted to me anymore,
and some types of girl who very sexual and aggressive. I am not observing these things anymore. İs that a good thing or bad?

in past a few girls ask me for a relationship or some implicit meanings leading for sex, but I didnt want them, they were attractive also like 7-8, and I dont know why I do not want sex or sexual intimacy with them, I didnt want them but I was always angry with myself for doing like that. I am afraid of sexual encounters I guess, I want to fix this.
AM6-RUN1-(04.2019)---AM6-RUN2-(11.2019)

Back-to-back AM6.

I am determined to live the life I want.
 
Reply
#4
Quote:And one question:
Some types of girls attracted to me in past exactly before using AM, this types were who got divorced parents or girls not raised by their parents, and what I observe is that kind of girls are not attracted to me anymore,
and some types of girl who very sexual and aggressive. I am not observing these things anymore. İs that a good thing or bad?

Sounds to me it's proof of your growth. The first thing I think is that you were attracting girls with alot of issues and now that you're becoming stronger in yourself you're ready to attract something new.
 
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#5
Yeess, that make sense. thanks Ben
AM6-RUN1-(04.2019)---AM6-RUN2-(11.2019)

Back-to-back AM6.

I am determined to live the life I want.
 
Reply
#6
new usage patterns: 13 hours 20 min hours every day Ocean masked.

Stage 1 Day 2

Just a vivid dream:

I was a home which I dont know where, it wasn't my family's or relatives. it was night and I was preparing to sleep. and suddenly I turned my head to windows near my bed, And I saw a man is there right front of the windows, (my room was near to a roof of another building.)
The man was like a dedective he was wearing a long coat something. I felt this man was a dangerous and harmful man to me. I was scared. I thought I have to catch him. I grabbed both his legs and dangling down.
and then I began to yell at my mother with my all strength "mommyy"
Then I realized all my family woke up and my mom said to me: Look at what you just done!, You woke up all the neighbors. and then I look at the strange man and he was gone,

I saw a woman who haven't got her body at half,( she just had arms and stomach). also there was a little girl probably her girl.
she was cleaning the roof.
little girl was looking at me like she know me. When I wake up, I was thinking I shouldn't act bad to my mother.
AM6-RUN1-(04.2019)---AM6-RUN2-(11.2019)

Back-to-back AM6.

I am determined to live the life I want.
 
Reply
#7
Stage 1 Day: 3

What I realized is that all my dream were about fear of something. Fearing from demons, fearing from strangers, not being good enough etc... I am afraid of beaten, I don't trust my body to protect myself .
I am seeing around people starting to fight with each other, or arguing about stupid things.
""Whenever I dreamt about afraiding of something , I encounter with these type of stuations. I guess my subconcious trying to "live" a stuation through manifestations that I need to protect myself or need to protect the other man who beaten,
When I was on stage 5 of Run 1, I decided to start a self-defence course to combine my bodybuilding with some kick-box.
But I forgot it later. On run 1 I dreamt about this thing very much and I won't let another failure about this.
I am 185 cm and 80 kgs. so my problem is not about body, but I have to face with a fight, I have to see "It is not a bad thing to be beaten." I am starting to a kick-box course tomorrow,

When I was child my family always told me, "don't be a part of backyard fights, or school fights. It is a bad thing to fight. My childhood passed by running away from fights and not responding to anyone when they walk over me. So this problem and its fear came across to me on Run 1. I am solving this now.
AM6-RUN1-(04.2019)---AM6-RUN2-(11.2019)

Back-to-back AM6.

I am determined to live the life I want.
 
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