05-18-2015, 09:11 PM
(05-18-2015, 05:45 PM)Shannon Wrote: I haven't bothered to read much of what was written after you replied to my post. I don't think the rest really applies, but I will try to explain the answer to your questions as I understand it.
I appreciate your return, Shannon.
(05-18-2015, 05:45 PM)Shannon Wrote: What you believe inwardly, you make real outwardly. This is almost entirely done at a subconscious level. And of course, like attracts like.
If you're looking to **** and have meaningless sex, then you want to find females who also want to **** and have meaningless sex. You have to attune yourself and your beliefs and energy to that of such women, and as they are typically very damaged and ***** up emotionally, mentally and sexually, they tend to believe that abuse = attention = love. They are therefore attracted to men who hate and mistreat women, because that's all they know and that's what they believe they deserve. Perpetuating that cycle is a very negative thing to do, and very costly in the end, in many ways. I strongly recommend against it.
The reason you attract those women is because when you hate women and treat them mysogynistically, you attract those women who want/need/choose that sort of treatment and repel the ones you actually want.
So, how can I make the shift? Because when I'm "nice" they see it's fake and just ignore me, but when I hate them, they love me. I don't imagine it'll take too long before I decide to screw it and go for what gets me results.
(05-18-2015, 05:45 PM)Shannon Wrote: You also need to make being around you fun, and having sex with you fun. Girls just wanna have fun. Yes, cheesy, but true. The guys who are most fun tend to have no particular agenda and are typically fairly spontaneous.
This one I never got. Sex IS fun. So, how could it not be fun??
(05-18-2015, 05:45 PM)Shannon Wrote: Also keep in mind that no matter what there will be someone who loves you, someone who hates you and 98% won't give a rat's patoot.
When you get needy, you're going to drive women away unless they are either also needy or they want to use and manipulate you. Being emotional is good. But too much of a good thing is not a good thing, and a man must be, to some degree at least, in control of his emotional expressions.
If you are needy and mysogynistic, and bisexual, it sounds to me as if it is likely that there has been some sort of horribly painful experience(s) that involved one or more women not giving you the emotional connection/consideration you needed and you have decided that in an effort to have a chance to be happy at all, you would leave all your options open (be bisexual).
What makes me needy?
Also, I've been bisexual since I can remember (age 6 and PRIOR) it's not a thing that developed over time, I've always been that way, just never come to terms with it till now.
I'm also not mysogynistic per-se. As a person, I WANT to be able to love women, but there's nothing to love except their love, so when I don't get it unless I hate em, well then I hate em. Isn't that just the way it works? I shouldn't try to change reality before changing myself, should I?
(05-18-2015, 05:45 PM)Shannon Wrote: Neediness does not go away if you mask it with hate. It just gets masked.
Again, what makes me needy?
(05-18-2015, 05:45 PM)Shannon Wrote: Find the root of your mysogyny, and work on understanding that not all women are like the one(s) who have hurt you. Then, stop blaming all women for the actions of a few, and forgive those who have hurt you.
WHEN my mysogyny rears it's head, it is often because of the "stupidity" of women. Their irrational and illogical ways. I guess it's a twisted way of accepting that that is how they are. So is it acceptance that I need?
As for forgiveness, I don't know how that works, since those who've hurt me CONTINUE to hurt me. How can I forgive them when they keep f*cking with me?
(05-18-2015, 05:45 PM)Shannon Wrote: Once you have achieved these things - and I mean truly achieved them - you'll experience a deep transformation that will allow you to see a huge change in your interactions with, and success with, women both sexually and romantically. I know this, because this was something I had to do after a multi-year and very painful and abusive relationship. I had to realize that it wasn't every woman, it was the women who I was attracting. And I was repeatedly attracting this type of woman because that's what I was looking for at some level. I could no more blame all women than I could say that the grass in my lawn was to blame, and when I accepted that and let go of my hate, and then refused to be mistreated again, and understood that my mistreatment came from not valuing myself relative to women, I started having wonderful relations and relationships with women.
Your issue is a little different, but you very much seem to need to understand, forgive, let go of hate and move on.
Maybe. We'll see. So far, hate is all that gets me respect, or attraction. Being indifferent zen master is easy, but it's not a life. It's like being dead and walking dead. At least with hate there is passion. LUCKILY (from what you're telling me) I have such a strong antagonism towards hate, so I rarely give into it. Preferring to find a way rather than give in. But I do feel that I will one day.
What I really "blame women for" is that they DO go for the abusives. I think it's deep hatred towards my mother who not only stayed with my abusive father, but let him abuse me and my brothers. When I see women give in to that hating energy, my blood boils. I hate them for THAT for the suffering they inflict on their children because they are f*cked up.
I'm never having kids btw unless I find a unicorn (i.e. a woman who's not f*cked up lol)
This response of yours is good, but I'm not seeing the way out. You're spotting the problems rather easily, but then I knew all that (mostly). My problem is HOW to gt out, or if I SHOULD get out? Why should I ignore gravity just because it makes me fall? Shouldn't I just accept it and learn to live with it? Likewise with women, shouldn't I just accept that they want to be treated like shit and stop fighting it?
Like I said (and I've been doing approaches for a while now) I've never seen a woman enjoy an interaction with me unless I had some level of anger or resentment present. The other ones are kind, and "impressed" but they don't give me numbers, nor want anything to do with me. This is at least 50 women by now too, so it's not like I'm just hitting the ones who want to be treated like shit. The law of averages says that I should have encountered a few who like the love by now.