10-21-2015, 09:31 PM
stage 4 day 8
It's now 11 days since I PMO'ed and things are starting to get interesting. I did a bit of reading on nofap subreddit, and now i see how destructive porn and daily masturbation really are! WOW i never would have guessed.
today while i was at an AA meeting, this plastic blonde lady (probably late 30's early 40's?) decided to sit right next to me. I didn't find her particularly attractive, but if I'm being completely honest, her plastic-ed up face made it very easy to objectify her in my mind. Her lips kind of stuck outwards in a really weird way but i just thought it's already pre-shaped to suck a dick lol. i figured that since stage 4 is introducing women to start seducing me, I give it a shot and I struck up a conversation. We just talked about simple shit, like how long we've been sober, career, etc. She was on her phone pretty much the whole meeting, but every few minutes I noticed her head was reeaaally close to my head lmao. it was almost creepy. after the meeting, my friend who was sitting across the room commented about how that lady was "hovering over" me. she asked me for a cigarette, i giver her one and jokingly say "when are you give it back back?" She replies "uhhh? i dont' know? will you be here tomorrow?" I say "i'm just messing with you, haha" and we went about our separate ways.
It's starting to become so second nature to be surrounded by girls, that it's REAL easy to forget that it has not always been like this. I find myself hugging girls for up to 30 seconds, and they love to linger around me, the younger ones especially (18-22). also one of the girls i mentioned in a previous post, 9/10 girl was talking to my buddy, and he asks why she doesn't have his phone number. she politely rejected him, then looked at me and said "i call and text you all the time!". and then walks away and says "see you saturday" to me, while my buddy is DUMBFOUNDED.
This must be a dream, because this is not supposed to be happening to me. my track record says i am not a desirable male. or at least my thought pattern, actions, and fears say that. i haven't gotten laid yet, but it's cumming soon.
Plus 11 days of nofap no porn no orgasm is REALLY starting to push the envelope in a new direction, and it's TORTURE! pure physical torture! I get slightly erect just from a girl touching me, it's ridiculous. but i like it, and i want more.
It's now 11 days since I PMO'ed and things are starting to get interesting. I did a bit of reading on nofap subreddit, and now i see how destructive porn and daily masturbation really are! WOW i never would have guessed.
today while i was at an AA meeting, this plastic blonde lady (probably late 30's early 40's?) decided to sit right next to me. I didn't find her particularly attractive, but if I'm being completely honest, her plastic-ed up face made it very easy to objectify her in my mind. Her lips kind of stuck outwards in a really weird way but i just thought it's already pre-shaped to suck a dick lol. i figured that since stage 4 is introducing women to start seducing me, I give it a shot and I struck up a conversation. We just talked about simple shit, like how long we've been sober, career, etc. She was on her phone pretty much the whole meeting, but every few minutes I noticed her head was reeaaally close to my head lmao. it was almost creepy. after the meeting, my friend who was sitting across the room commented about how that lady was "hovering over" me. she asked me for a cigarette, i giver her one and jokingly say "when are you give it back back?" She replies "uhhh? i dont' know? will you be here tomorrow?" I say "i'm just messing with you, haha" and we went about our separate ways.
It's starting to become so second nature to be surrounded by girls, that it's REAL easy to forget that it has not always been like this. I find myself hugging girls for up to 30 seconds, and they love to linger around me, the younger ones especially (18-22). also one of the girls i mentioned in a previous post, 9/10 girl was talking to my buddy, and he asks why she doesn't have his phone number. she politely rejected him, then looked at me and said "i call and text you all the time!". and then walks away and says "see you saturday" to me, while my buddy is DUMBFOUNDED.
This must be a dream, because this is not supposed to be happening to me. my track record says i am not a desirable male. or at least my thought pattern, actions, and fears say that. i haven't gotten laid yet, but it's cumming soon.
Plus 11 days of nofap no porn no orgasm is REALLY starting to push the envelope in a new direction, and it's TORTURE! pure physical torture! I get slightly erect just from a girl touching me, it's ridiculous. but i like it, and i want more.
