Ampers&d: The Year of the Alpha (Male 6.0)

[Ampersnd]

@FrostedFake; fair enough; I don't have all that much flowing cash at the moment.

Stage 6, Day 21,

I screwed up a bit when I picked the wrong 'Stage 6' for most of the day. I was listening to 3-4 rounds of Alpha Male v5. Now, I'm back to v6. My brain is pretty exhausted right now, and that was the case yesterday.

I had started running the sub at work on Ultrasonic; it brings up enormous resistance, since I'm being put up against real life shit in the moment. I feel the in-congruency and it hurts; I wind up lashing out. It was working against me, so I thought. Then, by Friday, I begin kicking ass at the job.

Frustration seems to help you get over hurdles, if done right. It makes sense; you keep missing the impala with your spear when you throw it, of course you get frustrated. Your brain stays focused on it until it consolidates a solution, if you stay focused on it (usually when you have no other choice)

When I am awake and alert, I feel overall smarter and sharper, as though the couple of months with 'Maximum Learning Speed' makes a comeback. But the tired feeling seems a bit more frequent. Haven't had any major issues with energy, surprisingly.

I feel a bit like a chump, playing video games on the weekend, wearing bad casual clothes, by myself all the time. I know that I have my work colleagues around lunch, and that I'm in this small town only for two weeks. That's a case of frustration. I'm strongly considering going out on Fridays and Saturdays, just to be out of the house, and to practice the Masculine Intent stuff. I've done a bit of work on masculine polarity, and it's improving.

I'm having a bit of uncertainty about a music career, possibly because that I have cabin fever from this small town, and a small social circle. This may change when I'm actually back in the big city, where I can buy nicer clothes, connect with the influencers, buy the books in the store, and approach sundress-wearing ladies.