(05-24-2015, 07:46 AM)SargeMaximus Wrote:(05-24-2015, 12:58 AM)Shannon Wrote: The way forward is to stop seeking outside yourself for your needs to be met. Find them within you. Master yourself.
What about food? What about shelter? What about water?
Sarge...he's obviously talking about emotional needs and about self validation...it's not to be taken literally. Let's not waste Shannon's precious time. I'd rather him spend time on EEHPRA, 6G research, or his own personal pursuits then writing 5-6 paragraphs and an hour or so to respond to that, come on man.
I have to be honest, for months now I've read posts from you, and I have trouble many times, discerning if sometimes you mischaracterise people's words due to your own past and hurts clouding your interpretation of things, making it difficult to get points across for you to see, or if it's trolling of some kind as the words from others seem crystal clear to me at least. Maybe a blend of both because I sense some frustration in your words, which is understandable, but the good news is, it can be largely avoided. This constant mental masturbation won't help.
You blame women for lots of things and claim you only get them when you mistreat them. It's been explained that like attracts like, and since you're acting in ways that are unhealthy to women, only women who are unhealthy will respond. So, we can all accept that's true then based off your own words. So then, the inverse must be true? If YOU are healthy and treat them in such ways, then healthy women will respond to you, seems reasonable? And before you quote this part and pull the "Well I'm already a nice guy and they treat me like shit" thing, I mean REALLY treating them healthy. Doing it because you care about them as people genuinely and in a healthy manner, not because you want to make them like you in order to get sex from them or attraction from them. Because that's nothing more than attempts to manipulate them, which is inherently disingenious and healthy women see right through it. And the only women that will respond to it are, you guessed it folks, unhealthy women, which leaves us with your current conundrum.
So far it seems to be a whole lot of victim mentality, pity party, and expecting THEM to change their "stupid, illogical" ways and give you the sex you want. Expecting the world to change to you, so you don't have to do anything different to magically get the life you want is not alpha behaviour. But, at the same time though, ironically, you don't seem to like women at all. How can you have sex with something you don't seem to really like? Do you TRULY like them or want a woman or not? I don't know if this is an issue with past hurts getting in the way, or maybe you just don't have true, real interest in women at the end of the day. Either is okay, but all this must be answered before you can be truly healthy and not be bothered by all these issues I think.
You come across as someone who needs to learn to be comfortable with who and what he is still. Who needs self validation. And who also needs to realise that not all women are out to get you, and that in reality, they owe you nothing. You owe yourself...that's it. Until that happens, how can you attract others, especially healthy people, when there are so many issues causing you to get in your own way? To give an example close to what Shannon gave earlier, have you ever met someone who never said they didn't like you at all, but it was obvious they didn't and they made that clear somehow without even saying a word about it? Maybe they seemed nice on the surface, but there was a bitter smugness and feeling of superiority and condescension in their demeanor? Did that make you feel comfortable around them? Did you want to spend more time around them? Of course not. That's how you're likely coming across to these women. What about when someone is being nice to you, and you know they're doing it just to get a favour or something from you? Does it make you feel positive things about this person, or negative things?
Long before subs, I had the same bitterness due to mistreatment too, and generalising about women out to hurt me etc. It has hugely derailed my personal life, I had the terrible misfortune of meeting 3 girls very young in my life, the first 3 I developed true feelings for, that turned out to be very toxic and caused me a lot of problems. Maybe I was naive at that age and saw them through rose coloured glasses, and didn't realise how bad they were until it was too late. Maybe they were nice...but just overwhelmed with my feelings at a young age and felt awkward or insecure or didn't feel worthy of them, whatever the case may be. I've missed out on so much with women for years and years due to all that damage, it's a shame. But, ultimately, I had to get over it or it'd consume me. That's why I'm taking an hour or so to think about this and write all this out for you. I believe in time, with effort, you can get over it too.
Posts to show you all this I have read for awhile now. I think you haven't accepted or maybe realised you have a hand in your current situation, and are instead blaming women solely for your current situation. Hopefully you'll see soon that it takes two to tango. That isn't an indictment of you, it's EMPOWERING you. Because that means if you've dug yourself into this, you can dig yourself out. Think about it that way!
I'm reminded by a quote that seems relevant, "What you allow, is what will continue."
You can do it Sarge, we're supporting you 100%.
