Quote:I have been reading alot lately (and have read alot in the past) that women are more interested in dating / sleeping with guys that insult them / are jerks to them.
After contemplation / consideration - I would rather live up to my standards of kindness / empowering others / caring / politeness, etc., even if I remain a virgin for the rest of my life.
It 'sounds' admirable. But think about how much of that is actually being programmed to be too nice and using it as a rationalization.
I noticed something interesting, I did an exercise where I wrote down the actions and mindsets I thought of when I think of being 'an asshole'. And I noticed alot of them are things that I actually want to do or say but never did because I was scared to, guilty to express myself or whatever. There were like 2 things on the list that I would say could be attributed to someone who is a REAL, destructive asshole, the rest are just bullshit programming I had.
I just think of alot of this stuff as asshole behaviour because i'm so not used to it.. but most of the stuff I thought of is something a confident, masculine, healthy man would do... though not according to alot of society because of all the bullshit and attacking any sign of masculinity that is going on, stupid feminist crap etc..
In the end I want to balance it, not just be an asshole just for the sake of it.. but I think doing so for a while was something needed.
The problem is (even for me at the moment) is assuming you have to be either extreme. Why can't someone who puts himself first, stands up for himself, is confident etc also be positive, lift people up etc.. of course he can.
-Ben
