01-21-2015, 08:09 PM
Stage 1, Day 18,
Gym was good, pMemory was a fun one too.
I'm starting to develop a very small tolerance for people who've, through habit, ignorance and enough time, allow themselves to get into a very tricky situation, and then whine like little babies about it.
Today, our class did a case study with a fictional 60 year old man whose been drinking compulsively for 25 years. He's now in a coma and in critical condition. I'm training to be a health care professional, so my job is to help get him back to "normal". Why tie up resources (my time and taxpayer money) to help someone who very clearly doesn't care enough to help themselves?
And even after that scare (I know this is fictional), this guy will probably start drinking again, and get himself in a whole new mess. Why bother? It's kind of pathetic, very happy to go the 'feel good now' route, and then crying like a little bitch when it has some consequences down the line.
If it's cancer, type 1 diabetes, certain neurological disorders, or even overweight but motivated and open to making changes, I'm very happy to work with them and work with them to the best of my ability, since it's legitimately not their fault.
If it's someone whose overweight, and doesn't care to make changes, well they should go fuck off and stop wasting my time. That's my mood today.
It might be cruel, but even if that person has 7 kids and is now having to work 60 hours a week to make it, it was still their decision to have the 7 kids, wasn't it? Either that, or they left their reproductive fate in someone else's hands, which is dumb, dumb, dumb!
In other news, I realized that I slink myself away at times to avoid intimidating people; I notice my prof gets a bit shaky when I speak with her, so I make sure to stand a bit shorter, cut eye contact short, and smile more. I wonder if in so doing, I'm alerting people even more to an incongruence. Not sure how to approach this, because I'm a couple inches over 6 foot, and I'm just under 200 pounds of mostly muscle (and growing). I could simply say that it's other peoples' responsibility to deal with how they perceive me, especially when I'm fully expressive and physically present.
Studying for the midterm tomorrow has been hard work, since I don't know if it's sinking in, and how I will perform tomorrow. Let's see if that "shine under pressure" aspect will come up tomorrow.
Gym was good, pMemory was a fun one too.
I'm starting to develop a very small tolerance for people who've, through habit, ignorance and enough time, allow themselves to get into a very tricky situation, and then whine like little babies about it.
Today, our class did a case study with a fictional 60 year old man whose been drinking compulsively for 25 years. He's now in a coma and in critical condition. I'm training to be a health care professional, so my job is to help get him back to "normal". Why tie up resources (my time and taxpayer money) to help someone who very clearly doesn't care enough to help themselves?
And even after that scare (I know this is fictional), this guy will probably start drinking again, and get himself in a whole new mess. Why bother? It's kind of pathetic, very happy to go the 'feel good now' route, and then crying like a little bitch when it has some consequences down the line.
If it's cancer, type 1 diabetes, certain neurological disorders, or even overweight but motivated and open to making changes, I'm very happy to work with them and work with them to the best of my ability, since it's legitimately not their fault.
If it's someone whose overweight, and doesn't care to make changes, well they should go fuck off and stop wasting my time. That's my mood today.
It might be cruel, but even if that person has 7 kids and is now having to work 60 hours a week to make it, it was still their decision to have the 7 kids, wasn't it? Either that, or they left their reproductive fate in someone else's hands, which is dumb, dumb, dumb!
In other news, I realized that I slink myself away at times to avoid intimidating people; I notice my prof gets a bit shaky when I speak with her, so I make sure to stand a bit shorter, cut eye contact short, and smile more. I wonder if in so doing, I'm alerting people even more to an incongruence. Not sure how to approach this, because I'm a couple inches over 6 foot, and I'm just under 200 pounds of mostly muscle (and growing). I could simply say that it's other peoples' responsibility to deal with how they perceive me, especially when I'm fully expressive and physically present.
Studying for the midterm tomorrow has been hard work, since I don't know if it's sinking in, and how I will perform tomorrow. Let's see if that "shine under pressure" aspect will come up tomorrow.
UMS v2 Journal (current) || Overcoming Fear 5.75G Journal
