Stage 4, Day 27,
I spent a sizable portion of the day figuring out what it was about the previous evening that had me so out of whack; it clearly wasn't being turned down for a game of "bury the hobbit"; I've had that happen before, and I was actually elated in those events.
There's a pretty long list of reasons that I came up with, which I won't elaborate as they're personal (and more related to her) and would take up a few pages worth of text. Once I had a satisfying answer, I made up my mind to get off the topic indefinitely; any extra thinking on that topic had become mentally masturbatory and more-or-less an "I'm right" ceremony. What can I say? I'm big on Law of Attraction, so getting mad over the past is considered unproductive.
I busked for the first time in several weeks; I lost some of my skill by not having sung in nearly 2 weeks, but I'm certainly on my way back. In two hours, I made 55$; very good for the Fall. Gonna focus on getting my voice in tip-top shape for, well, the "The Voice" callbacks. And, I'm the only one there this time of year, so I get all the prime spots.
I took advantage of the opportunity, late this evening, to come up with a 2 page short form list of things I want, to turn my attention from all these unpleasing things I had experienced yesterday. Now, I'm just focus on them and feel good; there's nothing to lose by that measure; I feel good, and I'm more likely to get what I want anyways.
I spent a sizable portion of the day figuring out what it was about the previous evening that had me so out of whack; it clearly wasn't being turned down for a game of "bury the hobbit"; I've had that happen before, and I was actually elated in those events.
There's a pretty long list of reasons that I came up with, which I won't elaborate as they're personal (and more related to her) and would take up a few pages worth of text. Once I had a satisfying answer, I made up my mind to get off the topic indefinitely; any extra thinking on that topic had become mentally masturbatory and more-or-less an "I'm right" ceremony. What can I say? I'm big on Law of Attraction, so getting mad over the past is considered unproductive.
I busked for the first time in several weeks; I lost some of my skill by not having sung in nearly 2 weeks, but I'm certainly on my way back. In two hours, I made 55$; very good for the Fall. Gonna focus on getting my voice in tip-top shape for, well, the "The Voice" callbacks. And, I'm the only one there this time of year, so I get all the prime spots.
I took advantage of the opportunity, late this evening, to come up with a 2 page short form list of things I want, to turn my attention from all these unpleasing things I had experienced yesterday. Now, I'm just focus on them and feel good; there's nothing to lose by that measure; I feel good, and I'm more likely to get what I want anyways.
UMS v2 Journal (current) || Overcoming Fear 5.75G Journal
