Ampers&d Finds His Mojo [SM3.0]

[Ampersnd]

I just had an insight, and I'll post it before I forget.

That long post is pretty much exactly how I think about the subject of love, very well worded too. The issue I've had with this for a loooong time is that, while I think of it like "I --love--> you", I often expect that if I express this to a woman, she will have the model of "I <--love-- you" and she'll start requiring all kinds of things from me, like increased commitment, time and moving the relationship forward back when I was in one. Now being single the troubling expectation has been that if I show --love--> towards them, they'll start to try and chain me. But I'm slowly getting the hang of it, you just need to stay strong in your integrity. I love giving love, as long as I don't have to fear that I'll be punished for it, i.e. she won't make it weird. Probably best for me to do a few negative click tracks on that so I won't be expecting, and therefore guiding, them to do that as much.

Yeah.. even if your perception changes, not everyone elses' will; it would be a bit much to expect everyone to instantly change their response upon hearing "I love you". Normally, it would seem that it's a trigger for them to start locking the person down into something "serious" and "real". Much like getting on one knee and offering a diamond ring would cause a very specific response, due to conditioning.

As Geodude said, once he releases on people with whom he's had issues, they not only stop that behavior, but they also becomes friends because of that.

And you're using SM3, right? The way you go about showing love may change so that it won't bring out the same response.