(08-16-2014, 08:53 PM)DanAmerson Wrote: I've basically accepted the fact that most long-term relationships are based on pretty erroneous concepts, so I'll do what I can to avoid very-long-term monogamist relationships. It's not even out of sadness or anger or defeat, but there was a minor sense of betrayal that guys (and girls) are suckered into these things, and a guy like Robin Williams lost 30 million in two failed marriages in alimony.
Yep. I gotta say, there's still a part of me that gets pissed of every time I hear a woman say anything about "just sex".. the way I see it, that language only considers two options: (1) one night stands, and (2) long-term exclusive relationships aiming towards marriage. So anything that isn't (2) get's labeled as "just sex", and with that label come associations like "he's just using you for sex", "meaningless" and I even think it somehow implies dishonesty. So, with BD's relationship categories, FBs, WDs and maybe even OLTRs would all be "just sex", no matter what you felt, how great a connection you had or how honest you were. I know this is just coming from my remaining need for external validation, but it pisses me off sometimes. A good exercise is to switch the gender roles and replace the word "sex" with "commitment" in that whole rant above.
Anyhow, maybe you will find yourself in a committed relationship in the (near or far) future because you'll want to do it at that time. At least you'll have a much more realistic picture of the whole thing, so it might actually be possible to make it work, sort of. I just started reading Sex 3.0, which seems very good. Its about the same topic, but its written in a more unisex manner, where BD's book is more of a how-to for men.
Thoughts, opinions and beliefs subject to change without prior notice.
