Jennie's Journal with Emotional Pain Relief and Healing Aid

[jennielee]

Thanks stratos!

Day 49: i found myself having a significant amount of fear yesterday later in the day regarding my pending doctor's appointment. Alot of it has been what if's. Like what if i get some sort of bad news. Thankfully my boyfriend has been extremely supportive in all this. I also find myself in a position where i have lost the trust i had with my ex. I feel that he was careless and irresponsible. I had gone on the same trust we had the first time, and didnt question things. Now i very much regret doing so. I can only hope that the immunization i had was finished and effective. My feelings on the matter are a bit difficult to verbalize at the moment, but i guess the best description is all this adds insult to injury.

I managed to escape for a bit this morning and go down to the beach. That really helped me feel much better. Also recognizing my fear has helped me control its impact on my life. I find that once i recognise it i can conquer it fairly easy. By conquer i mean i am to the point where it doesn't affect my choices or responses. Anyway guess thats it for today.