8 loops seems to be what I need, some nights i've gone down to 4 when I have the urge but then back to 8.
During my workout today I felt an increased sense of strength, usually I just go through my workout and no longer really feel this, nor the pumped up feeling I used to get which I believe was when I had higher testosterone, a feeling I love.
Today it wasn't massive but it was noticable. Maybe a couple of exercises in, I added an extra chinup and I felt pumped and was like "FUCK YEAH" which I can do cos I workout at home. I look forward to this building more. It's okay that it's not massive and sudden, i'd rather sustained and built over time so that it is more consistent and established to increase my results over time and sustain that.
I had the urge to go down the street, again I didn't really 'feel' much different, kind of just calm but again I was very much projecting something. I had this inspiration to goto a certain shop, I went in and to the sports section. The girl working asked if I needed help, and another girl working walked past and gave a massive smile, then she asked me "is it hot out there" and then enthusiastically expanded on when she went on her break earlier.
I definately noticed the enthusiasm and annoyingly I kind of was uncomfortable like "wow, i'm not used to this". I've got this several times on PM so far and it still takes me by surprise, i'm still fucking frustrated that some part of me when it notices this lessens it or shuts it down a bit. I just said "yeah" (great fucking response) and she looked annoyed like i'd rejected her or something, I recovered after not long but then she had gone in the back room to do stuff and didn't come back out. I was ready to keep talking to her.
I made a comment instead to the first one who had initially asked if I needed help when I left who was also cute and she responded well.. but she didn't inspire me like the 2nd one did.
My vibe lessened a bit but still was going on. Still I don't really notice it with girls who are walking past, other than one who had her head down when she seen me which is a submissive response. I rarely get smiles but I do get the submissive response at times.
Went into a clothes shop, a cute girl was working and talked to her briefly, she was happy and responsive too. The one in the first shop I could feel was attracted, not sure about this one but she was happy to talk.
Then walking down the street I noticed something funny, but again when I noticed this part of me shut it down a bit. But maybe 3 guys who walked past me suddenly seemed to be trying to put on a tough walk, but then they would get close and walk around me. I remember stuff like this on AM but it was more exaggerated on AM, like a big guy trying to act really tough then as soon as he got close his bodylanguage would shut down. I'd say it's actually an unconscious response from these guys, kind of like when I notice attention from girls and something shuts it down a bit. I had a thought of "what if I start working to assume I will get this good reaction". But then I don't know if that's good either, because i've had times like on AM I would be expecting these good reactions and then get pissed off and shut down more cos I didn't get it.
I then went into a bigger store and walked around a bit. When I went to the checkouts I went through the self-serve as there's barely anyone serving most of the time but there was a woman watching the self-serves, she was older and ugly but her response to me was so happy and over the top it also took me off guard. But because I had no attraction to her it didn't throw me off like the attractive girl and I chatted to her briefly.
Come home and i've got my one through the day ocean surf loop on, which I also think is good timing to help process some of the stuff from my outing.
I admit it's difficult to see some of the OSC journals and keep doing PM. Of course i've noticed that with most programs the initial journals are reporting good stuff at first atleast, hopefully with 6g that is alot more consistent over the longer term.
Current thought is stick to PM for my initial plan of atleast 3 months then see what to do. I'm liking that some stuff around becoming physically stronger is kicking in and around my workouts and I want that to build more too.
During my workout today I felt an increased sense of strength, usually I just go through my workout and no longer really feel this, nor the pumped up feeling I used to get which I believe was when I had higher testosterone, a feeling I love.
Today it wasn't massive but it was noticable. Maybe a couple of exercises in, I added an extra chinup and I felt pumped and was like "FUCK YEAH" which I can do cos I workout at home. I look forward to this building more. It's okay that it's not massive and sudden, i'd rather sustained and built over time so that it is more consistent and established to increase my results over time and sustain that.
I had the urge to go down the street, again I didn't really 'feel' much different, kind of just calm but again I was very much projecting something. I had this inspiration to goto a certain shop, I went in and to the sports section. The girl working asked if I needed help, and another girl working walked past and gave a massive smile, then she asked me "is it hot out there" and then enthusiastically expanded on when she went on her break earlier.
I definately noticed the enthusiasm and annoyingly I kind of was uncomfortable like "wow, i'm not used to this". I've got this several times on PM so far and it still takes me by surprise, i'm still fucking frustrated that some part of me when it notices this lessens it or shuts it down a bit. I just said "yeah" (great fucking response) and she looked annoyed like i'd rejected her or something, I recovered after not long but then she had gone in the back room to do stuff and didn't come back out. I was ready to keep talking to her.
I made a comment instead to the first one who had initially asked if I needed help when I left who was also cute and she responded well.. but she didn't inspire me like the 2nd one did.
My vibe lessened a bit but still was going on. Still I don't really notice it with girls who are walking past, other than one who had her head down when she seen me which is a submissive response. I rarely get smiles but I do get the submissive response at times.
Went into a clothes shop, a cute girl was working and talked to her briefly, she was happy and responsive too. The one in the first shop I could feel was attracted, not sure about this one but she was happy to talk.
Then walking down the street I noticed something funny, but again when I noticed this part of me shut it down a bit. But maybe 3 guys who walked past me suddenly seemed to be trying to put on a tough walk, but then they would get close and walk around me. I remember stuff like this on AM but it was more exaggerated on AM, like a big guy trying to act really tough then as soon as he got close his bodylanguage would shut down. I'd say it's actually an unconscious response from these guys, kind of like when I notice attention from girls and something shuts it down a bit. I had a thought of "what if I start working to assume I will get this good reaction". But then I don't know if that's good either, because i've had times like on AM I would be expecting these good reactions and then get pissed off and shut down more cos I didn't get it.
I then went into a bigger store and walked around a bit. When I went to the checkouts I went through the self-serve as there's barely anyone serving most of the time but there was a woman watching the self-serves, she was older and ugly but her response to me was so happy and over the top it also took me off guard. But because I had no attraction to her it didn't throw me off like the attractive girl and I chatted to her briefly.
Come home and i've got my one through the day ocean surf loop on, which I also think is good timing to help process some of the stuff from my outing.
I admit it's difficult to see some of the OSC journals and keep doing PM. Of course i've noticed that with most programs the initial journals are reporting good stuff at first atleast, hopefully with 6g that is alot more consistent over the longer term.
Current thought is stick to PM for my initial plan of atleast 3 months then see what to do. I'm liking that some stuff around becoming physically stronger is kicking in and around my workouts and I want that to build more too.
