Shannon's Journal Discussion Thread, Vol. 8

[callie]

Yes, I see why you would think that. I’m aware of this pattern too, and in the past I think that has definitely been self sabotage. However, over time I’ve developed greater self-awareness. Now I can better distinguish between the kind of resistance I can overcome by increasing exposure, and a threshold that feels forced or too aggressive, which I've learned not to push past. With OFv4 and OGsfv1, I ignored that intuitive feeling and tried to push through it, which led to increasing dissociation, among other issues. I've noticed that during the second and third listening cycles of E6, by the fifth day things start to feel slightly forced, and deeper issues always seem to arise when I ignore that feeling by listening anyway. So, my decision to reduce to four days is simply based on these observations. Perhaps I’m wrong, although I don't think so. If you think I cannot overcome this without following the instructions to a tee, then I fully accept that subliminals are not for me and that I need focus on other solutions

I believe there could be a compromise in how I listen and still make it work. If I didn't believe this, I wouldn't keep reaching out to you with my concerns. I understand that I’m probably frustrating you by continually bringing up problems and also taking up valuable time from you and others. I apologize for that. I’m just very determined to resolve my issues at this point, even if it means pushing some boundaries. Lastly, I want to mention that I do have positive experiences too; sometimes I have days where I feel very good

I am going to try one more cycle and see how things go

You are not frustrating me.  I am simply unsure how to help you based on what I have seen.  I am always here to help a customer if I can, but when I don't know how it gets difficult.

It is entirely possible to achieve the program goals by using the AutoConfig, which is designed to guide you to how best to use the program.  Aside from that, I would have to run your case through the models.  That is something I reserve for cases where there is no other option, which would include your case.  However, lately I am having a lot of difficulty getting the models to stabilize.  I would prefer to wait than give you an answer I am unsure of. 

In the mean time, given what you've said, perhaps following your intuitive experience of what works best is the way to go.  How has that gone in the past?

Alright, thanks. I appreciate that

The only time I acted on it was when I used UH. I couldn’t follow the 9 consecutive days of listening as was instructed, and instead did something like 6-7 days. I was using it in ultrasonic at the recommended volume though. I had good results with it over the 5 months I used it.

What always seems to happen when I follow the instructions in ultrasonic is that after a certain point, intense pressure starts building up in my head, my mood gradually shifts for the worse and if I keep listening it only gets worse. It's more subtle with the newer generation of subs though. But eventually my dreams become extremely aggressive and violent, similar to what has been happening on and off with E6 for a while. At that point I don’t feel like I’m healing, only making things worse