Rock's X4A-1511 journal

[Shannon]

It is also possible that you've blown it and they're not comfortable with you anymore. You have to find out which one it is.

It's possible I've blown it but I don't know what I would have done to blow anything.

That is exactly how you could have blown it: not knowing what you could do to blow it.  Based on what I read about your date, I would think they were expecting something else from you during and/or after your date.

I text my crush about an hour after I left and asked if she wanted to meet me for a movie tomorrow because I  think of something so I text her. No reply.

I sit and eat and say yes or no when asked if I need anything. I don't flirt but she was definitely more chatty a few weeks back.

I'm starting to feel uncomfortable myself and unsure why.

You probably feel uncomfortable because you're starting to realize there's something wrong, but you don't understand what it is.

How do I find out for sure if they're just not comfortable with me anymore without just saying that it seems I'm making you uncomfortable so I need another server?

Well, here's my assessment based on what I know.

First: fishing off the company pier.  In other words, you never try to date a woman who works where you work (or where you are a regular customer) because if something goes wrong, you have made everything awkward and uncomfortable for everyone (at best) and they may feel like they need to get a different job, or you may feel like you can't go there anymore (at worst).  This is not always a mistake, but if you do it, you'd better be damned good with women to pull it off.

Second: You seem (to my point of view, based on what I've been told here) have a habit of misinterpreting what they're communicating to you through sub-communication (body language, what they do, etc.).  For example, when the sister showed up wanting to be part of the date, you thought they were both attracted and interested.  That is a possibility, but what I saw was she wasn't fully comfortable being alone with you, so she brought her sister to make it hard for you to try anything inappropriate.  She was interested and attracted, but not yet comfortable with you.  That's how I interpreted what happened.

Third: You didn't do anything during the date but watch the movie.  At least as I understand it.  She may have felt like you were not really interested or maybe felt awkward because of what she was expecting.  Remember what I said about "dates".  Women have a million and one expectations the moment you make them think "date".  If she gets to thinking it's a "date", you're probably going to fail.

Fourth: You took her on a date.  And that's what she was expecting, even without saying the word "date" because of how you approached it.  You took my advice, but did not execute correctly, and she still was thinking it was a date.  Not necessarily your fault, if you're not familiar with that approach, but it remains the same result.

Fifth, you were confused about how to execute the date because of apparently bad advice and possibly inexperience.  One of my hard rules is, NEVER let a woman think too long before you go on a date with her, because she will ALWAYS make it either awkward or impossible if she has enough time to think too much about it.  If I ask a woman out on a "date", or she thinks it's a "date", I always make sure it happens within the shortest possible time frame.  Usually that very same day, or the next day at the latest.  When you set it up for such a long wait, she was overthinking the hell out of it, and her sister was too, which only made it worse.  You also changed your behavior between asking her out and the actual date, and you're honestly lucky she went through with it.  That is a testament to how attracted she actually was to you.

Sixth, your communication with her/them since asking for the date is seriously in question, and if you did not handle that well, that will have thrown the whole thing in the trash because she will have developed a completely different understanding than you did, and then subsequently interpreted everything you did and did not do through that lens.

So if I understand enough of what has happened, and I am correct, you are very close to totally failing in this situation because you did not communicate with her/them well enough and frequently enough.  The only way you can recover this is to try to correct that through a pro-active effort at open, honest communication, and the chances of you succeeding are very low at this point because she will not and cannot discuss it at work, and she is very unlikely to respond to any attempt to communicate outside of work.

Your only chance is to send her a text that says the right things to get you back on track, in my opinion.  Others may disagree.  But this is my assessment based on what I have read of your adventures.