Stage 6, Day 7:
I feel a lot of disappointment in myself and social anxiety. Here are some examples:
Two days ago, I went out with a guy I used to go out with a year ago when I was doing affirmations for attracting women. Back then, I was very confident and had a lot of women attracted to me. However, two days ago, he was much more confident than I was, and women were much more interested in him than in me. I had social anxiety, and when I approached them, I didn't feel any attention or attraction from women. I wouldn't say I was useless, but that's clearly not how things used to be. I was really disappointed with myself. Even the guy I was out with asked me what happened to my ability to approach with ease and started giving me lessons on how I should approach them—something I didn't really need 1.5 years ago.
Also, today at my job, a beautiful girl who started working at my place four years ago came in with her mom. Four years ago, she started working under me for a few days and then told me she was accepted as a manager at another place that I was interested in visiting and seeing. So, it was very awkward when I texted her back then, saying I was coming to the mall because I had a meeting with the manager and would come by to say hello and see the business she works in. She didn't reply, and then a day after, I sent her a text saying it's a really cool store and there are some things I could buy for my family, but I didn't see her there. She texted back something like, "Thank you for the opportunity to work in your business. I already told you I've decided not to work in your business. If I want to be in touch, I will do so. Thanks."
This really triggered me, and I texted back, "Actually, working in my business is not relevant anymore. It would be much better if you just stay there. I didn't really want to be in touch. I was polite because I was interested in seeing that business in the mall. That's why I texted you. I wish you good luck. Bye."
I was really embarrassed and felt humiliated because, to be honest, she did flirt with me when she started to learn the job, and I was interested in seeing the business but also interested in having a small talk with her. The way she reacted made me feel ashamed, even though I didn't do anything wrong.
Now, anyway, her mom came to my business today, and she was with her. This time, I hadn't seen her for about four years. She's very beautiful and actually became even more beautiful than she was. I was very pissed seeing her. Basically, I felt very awkward, and I had very big social anxiety, which I thought would not happen because I'm on the alpha male program. I mean, I know for sure if I were to do some affirmations for a week or two, I would not feel this way now, but it's not a long-term solution. Anyway, I couldn't even keep eye contact, and I was just looking at my phone. Looking back, she actually did something similar; she couldn't look me in my eyes and put her head down.
The point I'm making is that I have some social anxiety. I hope it will get better.
Why would this happen on stage 6?
I feel a lot of disappointment in myself and social anxiety. Here are some examples:
Two days ago, I went out with a guy I used to go out with a year ago when I was doing affirmations for attracting women. Back then, I was very confident and had a lot of women attracted to me. However, two days ago, he was much more confident than I was, and women were much more interested in him than in me. I had social anxiety, and when I approached them, I didn't feel any attention or attraction from women. I wouldn't say I was useless, but that's clearly not how things used to be. I was really disappointed with myself. Even the guy I was out with asked me what happened to my ability to approach with ease and started giving me lessons on how I should approach them—something I didn't really need 1.5 years ago.
Also, today at my job, a beautiful girl who started working at my place four years ago came in with her mom. Four years ago, she started working under me for a few days and then told me she was accepted as a manager at another place that I was interested in visiting and seeing. So, it was very awkward when I texted her back then, saying I was coming to the mall because I had a meeting with the manager and would come by to say hello and see the business she works in. She didn't reply, and then a day after, I sent her a text saying it's a really cool store and there are some things I could buy for my family, but I didn't see her there. She texted back something like, "Thank you for the opportunity to work in your business. I already told you I've decided not to work in your business. If I want to be in touch, I will do so. Thanks."
This really triggered me, and I texted back, "Actually, working in my business is not relevant anymore. It would be much better if you just stay there. I didn't really want to be in touch. I was polite because I was interested in seeing that business in the mall. That's why I texted you. I wish you good luck. Bye."
I was really embarrassed and felt humiliated because, to be honest, she did flirt with me when she started to learn the job, and I was interested in seeing the business but also interested in having a small talk with her. The way she reacted made me feel ashamed, even though I didn't do anything wrong.
Now, anyway, her mom came to my business today, and she was with her. This time, I hadn't seen her for about four years. She's very beautiful and actually became even more beautiful than she was. I was very pissed seeing her. Basically, I felt very awkward, and I had very big social anxiety, which I thought would not happen because I'm on the alpha male program. I mean, I know for sure if I were to do some affirmations for a week or two, I would not feel this way now, but it's not a long-term solution. Anyway, I couldn't even keep eye contact, and I was just looking at my phone. Looking back, she actually did something similar; she couldn't look me in my eyes and put her head down.
The point I'm making is that I have some social anxiety. I hope it will get better.
Why would this happen on stage 6?
