I can't handle continuing OGSF.
Looking at my journal of UH and OGSF and thinking about the difference.. it's done 'some' stuff, but really it's dug me deeper into a hole of hopelessness. No desire to socialize or go far, obviously not helped by diahhrea and such from the chinese herbs, losing interest in almost everything. Wheras on UH I remember going out and exploring more and genuinely enjoying it and had alot more positives. So E6 being more focused on emotional as there isn't the additional physical healing like in UH will be more beneficial for me.
A few occasional posts in this journal early on of positive stuff, but over time it's just got worse. The intensity has reached a very high level, a few very intense nights in bed, one night just laying there thinking I just want the pain to end, both physical and emotional. I don't want to expand on that too much as it may come across as a serious thing, but some fairly dark thoughts with that. I thought it passed but it's come up another few nights too in the last week or two.
A little better this week, energy coming back after stopping herbs completely. Did a couple of workouts.
If I had to sum up OGSF v2 it's basically going deeper and deeper into hopelessness and not really resolving it, each time going deeper and not finding much enjoyment in anything. I've had some very strong intensity come up with other programs, but not to this level. It also feels similar to what Magnus said, there are some other intense emotions that may not be related to guilt, shame, fear.
E6 has alot more 'support' stuff that I feel would be beneficial, and others reporting issues on OGSF have reported it improving on E6.
OGSF v2 was like continually tearing me down more and more, but never building me up, just leaving me there in a hole and I don't know what the fuck to do or how to get out of it other than keep listening.. oh yeah now the hole is deeper.
Even reading my UH journal compared to this journal there's a big difference in my vibe, on UH it seemed fairly good, with OGSF dark, down, hopelessness.
So i'm not continuing it, it's not going to solve it, continually for nearly 5 months with the same old "it's just around the corner, obviously it's working on something big now, it must be going to pass soon" etc.. then nope, it just gets worse.
A bit more time off maybe another few days to a week or so (i'm around day 5 of my off days) and thinking about what to do next.
Either going back to methods I applied myself that actually helped me change behaviours and habits and achieve goals or to E6 to deal with what OGSF has brought up. I don't really like writing up stuff like this, but this has been my experience with OGSF.
Last Day Of Listening - 9/2/24.
Looking at my journal of UH and OGSF and thinking about the difference.. it's done 'some' stuff, but really it's dug me deeper into a hole of hopelessness. No desire to socialize or go far, obviously not helped by diahhrea and such from the chinese herbs, losing interest in almost everything. Wheras on UH I remember going out and exploring more and genuinely enjoying it and had alot more positives. So E6 being more focused on emotional as there isn't the additional physical healing like in UH will be more beneficial for me.
A few occasional posts in this journal early on of positive stuff, but over time it's just got worse. The intensity has reached a very high level, a few very intense nights in bed, one night just laying there thinking I just want the pain to end, both physical and emotional. I don't want to expand on that too much as it may come across as a serious thing, but some fairly dark thoughts with that. I thought it passed but it's come up another few nights too in the last week or two.
A little better this week, energy coming back after stopping herbs completely. Did a couple of workouts.
If I had to sum up OGSF v2 it's basically going deeper and deeper into hopelessness and not really resolving it, each time going deeper and not finding much enjoyment in anything. I've had some very strong intensity come up with other programs, but not to this level. It also feels similar to what Magnus said, there are some other intense emotions that may not be related to guilt, shame, fear.
E6 has alot more 'support' stuff that I feel would be beneficial, and others reporting issues on OGSF have reported it improving on E6.
OGSF v2 was like continually tearing me down more and more, but never building me up, just leaving me there in a hole and I don't know what the fuck to do or how to get out of it other than keep listening.. oh yeah now the hole is deeper.
Even reading my UH journal compared to this journal there's a big difference in my vibe, on UH it seemed fairly good, with OGSF dark, down, hopelessness.
So i'm not continuing it, it's not going to solve it, continually for nearly 5 months with the same old "it's just around the corner, obviously it's working on something big now, it must be going to pass soon" etc.. then nope, it just gets worse.
A bit more time off maybe another few days to a week or so (i'm around day 5 of my off days) and thinking about what to do next.
Either going back to methods I applied myself that actually helped me change behaviours and habits and achieve goals or to E6 to deal with what OGSF has brought up. I don't really like writing up stuff like this, but this has been my experience with OGSF.
Last Day Of Listening - 9/2/24.
