Stage 4 day 10
At ER for getting a treatment for myself: thought about dead and the life of my parents they are getting old
Thought about how I am nothing without my health
And how eventually everything ends nobody cares you die and that's all that's left
How could I live my life better? How can I become more independent and get more money and respect?
Not easy questions probably will need a lot of time to figure things out.
Sick for 4 days
Unfortunately I'm very sick the past few days.
I've started antibiotics just today not sure if it's helping as my heart went crazy for few hours after taking it
So I'm basically in bed listening to the ultrasonic as much as possible...
But I'll probably will have to add few days to stage 4 just to be on the safe side.
I really hope to come back soon
Women department:
Forgot to mention about 2 weeks ago I approached a beautiful girl she's a Pole dancing teacher which means I guess every other guy would die to talk to her
I was totally in control!
And exuded a 100% solid rock type of confidence without even trying.
I do have experience with women, but I guess usually I show some excitement and usually I'm less grounded.
But when I talked to her I was like a fucking Rock in the ground not moving not flinching
Me: Hi you! I like your style you look like a tourist haha (she's not a tourist and it was obvious)
She: omg thank you! Lol I'm not a tourist haha
We continue... And then
She - asked me about my job
Me: laughed and said "I go to a place I work there and I get money what about you?"
She laughed a bit and wanted to know more which I didn't give to her...
She - I dance
Me: Oh!! I really like girls who dance (it's true I'm not playing games here) just please don't say Pole dance
She - omg how did you know? I'm a pole dancing teacher I have my own studio
Me: *lost some interest* oh.. I mean a lot of women do that I thought you do something modern but that's cool as well I guess...
From the get go she was really into me like really showing a lot of interest got her number and she still kept talking and talking but I wanted to go meet a friend.. so I said bye
She replied but at some point disappeared and then again replied later on till I told her I deleted her number cuz it seems like she's not interested in talking (basically I don't like these games) she then texted a bit but I didn't really try to chase I don't like this game she's trying to play.
The point is not that she's a flake but this..
I think the point I'm trying to make here is..
I felt and exuded a real type of an alpha male vibe and she totally reacted to that! I was non needy and she felt that too
I tried to see what she has to offer as a person and not just as a beautiful woman and she noticed that too
She's really sexy saw some of her photos on a Pole doing full splits and all that but I am not phased by it at all because I see myself as a great man that has a lot to offer for women.
I bet too many guys try to get her attention and she doesn't give them even the time of day and they are probably too needy and they try to qualify themselves to her.
I was naturally attractive.
That being said it is not the manifestations I used to have, when I tried to manifest women I had them compliment me and approach me sometimes want to have sex with me right away
It's a different program and I need to accept it..
I guess some of my former experiences I had with affirmations are more of the direction of WM and SM which I want to try later on
I'm really proud of myself becoming a really non needy guy and a rock infront of women even though not all of them react to me as I'd like.
I want to share another experience I had
There's a beautiful girl I saw in my job I didn't react to her beauty at all and didn't really think about it too much
But the thing is later on and even infront of me I heard how even OLD MEN over react to her!!!! Like wtf?!
And some women paying compliments to her all the time like crazy compliments and crazy attention she's getting
And then the coin dropped:
I became so much more stable than I was and than everyone else! Which just proves to me I'm the type of men who can handle women on that caliber of beauty
Meaning the 9's and the 10's will have to go for someone like me who doesn't put her on a pedestal
I mean I don't even blink
And she started blushing and smiling on more than one occasion when I looked her in the eyes when we had a chat
I didn't even think about anything else but what I was talking about
I caught her one time when she started smiling at me when we talked about something and we had a strong eye contact
and I was : Hey what?!
She: *caught herself smiling and stopped* oh mm nothing.
When I'm at work I'm fully at work
Again, I didn't even think about it until some guys came up to me talking about her beauty and some guys talking to her infront of me in some ridiculous ways!
Then I thought about it for 3 days!!
"Why do people compliment her all the time? Why guys lose their strength and give their power away to her like that? Even 65 years old men?! It's crazy and why women act like that?" Then I was like ok I'm up here 10/10 and other guys are down there 5/10
(When it comes to non reactiveness, confidence dominance and alphaness)
At ER for getting a treatment for myself: thought about dead and the life of my parents they are getting old
Thought about how I am nothing without my health
And how eventually everything ends nobody cares you die and that's all that's left
How could I live my life better? How can I become more independent and get more money and respect?
Not easy questions probably will need a lot of time to figure things out.
Sick for 4 days
Unfortunately I'm very sick the past few days.
I've started antibiotics just today not sure if it's helping as my heart went crazy for few hours after taking it
So I'm basically in bed listening to the ultrasonic as much as possible...
But I'll probably will have to add few days to stage 4 just to be on the safe side.
I really hope to come back soon
Women department:
Forgot to mention about 2 weeks ago I approached a beautiful girl she's a Pole dancing teacher which means I guess every other guy would die to talk to her
I was totally in control!
And exuded a 100% solid rock type of confidence without even trying.
I do have experience with women, but I guess usually I show some excitement and usually I'm less grounded.
But when I talked to her I was like a fucking Rock in the ground not moving not flinching
Me: Hi you! I like your style you look like a tourist haha (she's not a tourist and it was obvious)
She: omg thank you! Lol I'm not a tourist haha
We continue... And then
She - asked me about my job
Me: laughed and said "I go to a place I work there and I get money what about you?"
She laughed a bit and wanted to know more which I didn't give to her...
She - I dance
Me: Oh!! I really like girls who dance (it's true I'm not playing games here) just please don't say Pole dance
She - omg how did you know? I'm a pole dancing teacher I have my own studio
Me: *lost some interest* oh.. I mean a lot of women do that I thought you do something modern but that's cool as well I guess...
From the get go she was really into me like really showing a lot of interest got her number and she still kept talking and talking but I wanted to go meet a friend.. so I said bye
She replied but at some point disappeared and then again replied later on till I told her I deleted her number cuz it seems like she's not interested in talking (basically I don't like these games) she then texted a bit but I didn't really try to chase I don't like this game she's trying to play.
The point is not that she's a flake but this..
I think the point I'm trying to make here is..
I felt and exuded a real type of an alpha male vibe and she totally reacted to that! I was non needy and she felt that too
I tried to see what she has to offer as a person and not just as a beautiful woman and she noticed that too
She's really sexy saw some of her photos on a Pole doing full splits and all that but I am not phased by it at all because I see myself as a great man that has a lot to offer for women.
I bet too many guys try to get her attention and she doesn't give them even the time of day and they are probably too needy and they try to qualify themselves to her.
I was naturally attractive.
That being said it is not the manifestations I used to have, when I tried to manifest women I had them compliment me and approach me sometimes want to have sex with me right away
It's a different program and I need to accept it..
I guess some of my former experiences I had with affirmations are more of the direction of WM and SM which I want to try later on
I'm really proud of myself becoming a really non needy guy and a rock infront of women even though not all of them react to me as I'd like.
I want to share another experience I had
There's a beautiful girl I saw in my job I didn't react to her beauty at all and didn't really think about it too much
But the thing is later on and even infront of me I heard how even OLD MEN over react to her!!!! Like wtf?!
And some women paying compliments to her all the time like crazy compliments and crazy attention she's getting
And then the coin dropped:
I became so much more stable than I was and than everyone else! Which just proves to me I'm the type of men who can handle women on that caliber of beauty
Meaning the 9's and the 10's will have to go for someone like me who doesn't put her on a pedestal
I mean I don't even blink
And she started blushing and smiling on more than one occasion when I looked her in the eyes when we had a chat
I didn't even think about anything else but what I was talking about
I caught her one time when she started smiling at me when we talked about something and we had a strong eye contact
and I was : Hey what?!
She: *caught herself smiling and stopped* oh mm nothing.
When I'm at work I'm fully at work
Again, I didn't even think about it until some guys came up to me talking about her beauty and some guys talking to her infront of me in some ridiculous ways!
Then I thought about it for 3 days!!
"Why do people compliment her all the time? Why guys lose their strength and give their power away to her like that? Even 65 years old men?! It's crazy and why women act like that?" Then I was like ok I'm up here 10/10 and other guys are down there 5/10
(When it comes to non reactiveness, confidence dominance and alphaness)
