02-24-2023, 02:19 AM
(02-23-2023, 07:48 PM)ReconGunner Wrote: I want to offer some encouragement. I see you have a good attitude toward what is happening, even though its hard. That is both a part of what E5 does, and something you need to keep you going through the rest of what E5 does. Take heart and stay with it.
Like you said. "Doing it [is] the victory."
Thank you ReconGunner. I agree with sticking with it, having experienced fruit multiple times on the other end of pain and fear I've experienced. This has been going deeper than expected.
For example, right now I'm still holding this tense ball in my throat, which shows fear and reluctance to grieve. And I've used multiple emotional healing subs from multiple places through the years. Having grown discouraged from not moving (OR I faced a strong fear which wouldn't budge), I'd pull off and give myself hell for pulling off.
The module in E5 to not pull off to avoid healing is loud right now, and it simultaneously offers me a peace. I'm not sure where I'm going, but I know how it feels to pull off, and that only means pain and self-derision. I'm staying on in large part due to that peace.
I want to be FREE!
