Getting started with MLS

[Shannon]

Month 3, Day 4 (Total Day 61)

Today marks the 5th day of 4 ultrasonic loops every day. MLS has been at work dealing with my resistance and fears. Mainly fears I think. In my mind this resistance is visualized by a picture of me sitting on my childhood bed, scared and hugging a pillow close. Afraid to move and to do something wrong / be different and disliked for it.
This fear may be linked to being shunned by other kids because of being different, "weird" or "smarter". Today I could clearly see this fear in my mind.

That is a very clear communication from your subconscious as to what part of you is afraid to execute, and why.  I had that issue when I was growing up, being smarter than almost everyone else around me, and being "weird".  I was confused why everyone thought I was weird, until one day I realized that they don't understand me.  I'm thinking on a level they're not on, and understanding things they don't understand, and this leads me to curiosities they don't have, and learning things they don't learn, which results in perceptions, choices and actions they don't have and therefore don't understand.  I realized that it wasn't so much that I'm "weird", as I do and say things they don't understand and I have interests they don't understand.  I also realized through this that being "weird" (or being perceived by others as being "weird") isn't a bad thing; it's just a function of them not knowing how to classify me, and therefore how to respond to me.  They can't figure out what to do with me, or how to respond to me, so they classify me as "weird".

And... it is what it is, I am what I am, and I accepted myself as I am and did my own thing.  You can achieve and be your full potential and still be happy.  In fact I would be you'd be much more happy by doing so.

Another fear that is being dealt with is an internal mantra or conviction of "I am not this person"  / "this is not me" when thinking about super learning or being extra smart. This fear seems not to stem from outside but rather from inside, because if I would be that person that would mean I would have to do all that extra work an extra smart person would do. First that seems like a hell of a workload and then there's also the question: what if I would fail and not achieve this workload? So my resistance is the subconcious "defensive decision" to not be super smart so I won't have to do this extra work and avoid the dangers of failing

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Extra work?  That sounds like some faulty beliefs to me.  You choose how much "work" you want to do, regardless of how smart you are.  The smartest person in the world, right now, does very little kin the way of anything.  He leads a very low key, boring life.  And beyond that, you know what failing is?  It's how you figure out how to succeed, and that means that there's no such thing as "failing" unless you give up before you have used your failures to learn how to succeed.

Just because you have a certain level of intelligence doesn't mean you're obligated to get any particular degree or do any particular type or amount of work.  I got my AA degree, and half way through my Bachelor's degree I realized that I neither need it, nor want it, nor wan the student loan debt that comes with it.  I dropped out and used this business to pay off my student loans, and then used it to fund me in doing what I really love - discovering and understanding the human mind, and how to use the human mind to make our lives better.  And had I tried to "go to college" for that, I'd have been told, "Modern science says that subliminals don't work." and I wouldn't be doing what I'm doing, or making he difference I am making in the world with my work.  I also would still be paying off student loan debt, and working a job I hate instead of doing what I love.  Instead, I'm doing what I love, learning more and more every day - my way - and making programs that make a positive difference in the world, using methods modern science and psychology largely says don't and can't work, because they're still trying to decide if subliminals work... based on someone being afraid of having their reputation or funding damaged if they open their mind to the empirical evidence, instead of parroting the status quo.

Not saying college or science is worthless, but more and more college only makes sense if you have one of a specific set of goals.  Do I want you to get all the schooling you possibly can before you do brain surgery on me, defend me legally or work on a vaccine I may be ingesting?  You bet your ass I do.  But do I think you should go to college "just because", without knowing what your end goal is, and only aiming to "get a degree that will let you get a better paying job"?  No.  There are too many of those already, and in fact so many that one now needs a Master's degree or Doctorate just to be taken seriously some of the time.  

The whole point is, intelligence does not obligate you to a specific amount of work, a specific level of collegiate education, or anything else.  Got a little wordier than I was going for there. 

Furthermore I had some interesting self effects of in-the-moment feelings during the loops today. During the second loop I experienced feelings of doubt and insecurity. Also some uneasiness / stress of about 1 minute. These feelings subsided in about 15 minutes. Afterwards I was feeling normal until the first quarter of the 4th loop, there I felt intense relief and some joy, like something had given way to the Sub.

So with this last feeling of relief I hope that the next days will be going smoother and I will continue with 4 ultrasonic loops every day until further notice.

Goodto hear.