07-22-2020, 08:23 AM
Day 52 (3)
I've just had possibly the weirdest dream of my life. Let me explain.
I have dreams quite a lot - at least I remember dreams quite a lot. And I not only remember what happened in them, but also their feel and characteristics. For example I had dreams where I saw pretty much nothing and that was happening was because I "felt it". OK, so imagine you sit in your room and you close your eyes - you no longer see your room as there is only black, but you can create kind of map of this room and this is what I mean by feeling it. There was no sight (even if there were sounds for example), but I knew what is what and where.
OK, back to today's dream. The entire dream, lasting maybe 2 minutes of so, was me sitting on a couch or sofa with my old sweetheart. I mention her every now and then, needless to say I was in love with her 8 years ago or so and she rejected me - I took it bad and it still bothers me. OK, so we were talking and... that's it. I don't remember what we were talking about. I remember she was smiling and generally happy to be there with me. There was nothing erotic or romantic, simply two friends chatting.
There were two things weird. First one in the detail in this dream. Often times in dreams I have to "feel" that someone is someone as the details are simply not there. Here she looked exactly like in real life, down to single hair and pores of her skin. I don't ever remember dream that was so... mundane. Realistic. Nothing out of ordinary happened there, nothing that would not happen in real life. And detail was so good it shocks me to this moment.
The second thing is that she was willing to talk to me. OK, so like I said she rejected me and so for 7 years when she'd appear in my dreams it would be as either someone hostile to me or not noticing me at all. In April I believe, after my first Tinder date and the fallout thereof, I had two dreams with her, in both of them she was friendly but not that interested in interaction with me. Now, after a second tinder date and fallout thereof (I wrote yesterday to that girl to explain some things and give both of us some closure) I have a dream where she treats me like her friends and directly interacts with me.
I believe I don't have to stress that this is something I very much want and almost dream of. You know, if I had a magic lamp and 3 wishes that might be one of them. Not to be with her, but for her to be back in my life and maybe see if this would work out. From what I know she's either single or not showing off with her romantic life. I get this feeling that this weird "when you got to 30 day long streak in NoFap good things will start to happen" shtick is about exactly this. At least it's a nice idea that gives me some motivation.
It's all so weird :/
I've just had possibly the weirdest dream of my life. Let me explain.
I have dreams quite a lot - at least I remember dreams quite a lot. And I not only remember what happened in them, but also their feel and characteristics. For example I had dreams where I saw pretty much nothing and that was happening was because I "felt it". OK, so imagine you sit in your room and you close your eyes - you no longer see your room as there is only black, but you can create kind of map of this room and this is what I mean by feeling it. There was no sight (even if there were sounds for example), but I knew what is what and where.
OK, back to today's dream. The entire dream, lasting maybe 2 minutes of so, was me sitting on a couch or sofa with my old sweetheart. I mention her every now and then, needless to say I was in love with her 8 years ago or so and she rejected me - I took it bad and it still bothers me. OK, so we were talking and... that's it. I don't remember what we were talking about. I remember she was smiling and generally happy to be there with me. There was nothing erotic or romantic, simply two friends chatting.
There were two things weird. First one in the detail in this dream. Often times in dreams I have to "feel" that someone is someone as the details are simply not there. Here she looked exactly like in real life, down to single hair and pores of her skin. I don't ever remember dream that was so... mundane. Realistic. Nothing out of ordinary happened there, nothing that would not happen in real life. And detail was so good it shocks me to this moment.
The second thing is that she was willing to talk to me. OK, so like I said she rejected me and so for 7 years when she'd appear in my dreams it would be as either someone hostile to me or not noticing me at all. In April I believe, after my first Tinder date and the fallout thereof, I had two dreams with her, in both of them she was friendly but not that interested in interaction with me. Now, after a second tinder date and fallout thereof (I wrote yesterday to that girl to explain some things and give both of us some closure) I have a dream where she treats me like her friends and directly interacts with me.
I believe I don't have to stress that this is something I very much want and almost dream of. You know, if I had a magic lamp and 3 wishes that might be one of them. Not to be with her, but for her to be back in my life and maybe see if this would work out. From what I know she's either single or not showing off with her romantic life. I get this feeling that this weird "when you got to 30 day long streak in NoFap good things will start to happen" shtick is about exactly this. At least it's a nice idea that gives me some motivation.
It's all so weird :/
For not by numbers of men, nor by measure of body, but by valor of soul is war to be decided.
~Belisarius, the last Roman
Certitude is for the puzzle-box logicians and girls of white glamour [...]. I am a letter written in uncertainty.
~36 Lessons of Vivec, Sermon 4
~Belisarius, the last Roman
Certitude is for the puzzle-box logicians and girls of white glamour [...]. I am a letter written in uncertainty.
~36 Lessons of Vivec, Sermon 4
