01-04-2020, 12:02 PM
Day 99 (day 4 off)
It’s the last day of time off. No bloom, nothing in sight. I think I’m going to stop with DMSI for now.
Recently, within the last two weeks, I’ve gotten a much clearer picture of the grief/pain in my chest. It probably started with early trauma and not feeling safe there, but it was compounded by feedback from parents, from peers, from girls. It flames up with me feeling sexual desire and arousal, and it feels like it’s been in the way of both my DMSI and LTU runs.
So I’m going to try other modalities. My sexuality coach suggested EMDR and hypnotherapy, and when talking about overcoming her trauma, said that she basically tried everything and only the combination of everything at once was enough to loosen her pain enough for it to be healed. So I’m probably going down the same path there: try everything and get things to loosen.
From the descriptions of the subs, it sounds like it’s not safe to mix the subs with all of this, so that’s why I’m stopping it. If it were safe but not recommended, I would keep at the sub (marking myself as non-compliant), as any leverage that I could get with the FRM would be appreciated.
In any case, though, I really do appreciate everyone here. I hope to be back someday when the grief is gone and I have a better chance of executing.
It’s the last day of time off. No bloom, nothing in sight. I think I’m going to stop with DMSI for now.
Recently, within the last two weeks, I’ve gotten a much clearer picture of the grief/pain in my chest. It probably started with early trauma and not feeling safe there, but it was compounded by feedback from parents, from peers, from girls. It flames up with me feeling sexual desire and arousal, and it feels like it’s been in the way of both my DMSI and LTU runs.
So I’m going to try other modalities. My sexuality coach suggested EMDR and hypnotherapy, and when talking about overcoming her trauma, said that she basically tried everything and only the combination of everything at once was enough to loosen her pain enough for it to be healed. So I’m probably going down the same path there: try everything and get things to loosen.
From the descriptions of the subs, it sounds like it’s not safe to mix the subs with all of this, so that’s why I’m stopping it. If it were safe but not recommended, I would keep at the sub (marking myself as non-compliant), as any leverage that I could get with the FRM would be appreciated.
In any case, though, I really do appreciate everyone here. I hope to be back someday when the grief is gone and I have a better chance of executing.
I share the details of my life in my posts to help in the understanding of the effects of the subliminals I use. I am only open to advice that relates to the use of the subliminals.
