12-07-2019, 11:29 AM
The End (1)
And thus my second run of LTU 5 has come to and end... I think it's time for a summary.
From my posts one might think this wasn't too successful of a run and they might be right, however it wasn't terrible. There has been better and worse days, however overall it was leading somewhere. My number one goal was achieved - I finally managed to get good work ethic, stopped working from home and developed habit of waking up early to be able to work where I should work. This decoupling made it so I finally could come back home and relax without worry. And given that I was able to do this with taking more projects on my shoulders than I should have was astonishing for me.
This had inverse effects of course. My sleep schedule was often hectic and leaving me with handful of hours of sleep per day, leading to exhaustion - the main cause of my anxiety and faul mood. When I got this into more order my mood improved almost immediately. I have less time for other interests, but I think it's obvious coming back from summer vacation season. Lots of my habits went to crap but that was sacrifice I was willing to take in order to keep going.
Other good news - I was able to keep my weight, a great issue for me as I was worried about yo-yo effect. Come spring I will want to burn the rest of my fat but that will need to wait for that time. My confidence is high and has been high since at least April - I never worry about my confidence or self-esteem nowadays. I never second-guess myself and approach challenges head-on. Well, maybe except for my love life...
This is an issue I was trying to deal with this entire run and I just couldn't. Last run I was pretending it didn't exist, now I tried to understand it and quite frankly I have failed. A radical change of framework is needed for this one and, who knows, maybe in a month or 2 I'll start to date again. Not because I think I'm ready yet, but because I think I did all I could from comfortable armchair perspective.
Sooo.... what's next? I want to have a month off, to look at things from a new perspective, set out new goals. One thing wrong with this sub idea is that... I feel like I'm expected to get results. For December I have no obligations, I can just do what I want if that makes sense. I don't feel obliged to self-improve. I will keep posting from time to time, I intend to write about my next run in the same journal.
I don't know what I want to run next. @Shannon and whoever else is willing to contribute - here's the question. Would it be better for me to run third LTU run or give newest DMSI version a shot? Or maybe some other sub, I'm not exactly following what hot right now. I'm looking for something that will keep challenging me and letting me cleanse myself of my anxieties and pushing me to experience more and new things. LTU is nice but third full run...? I'm afraid of diminishing returns. DMSI is also nice but how much will I get from it if I decide it's not time to enter the dating scene just yet?
Thanks everyone on this forum, I don't contribute much nowadays but I lurk from time to time and I love you guys and girls. I appreciate every comment and suggestion. And thank you for giving me the forum where I can share my oftentimes bizarre and convoluted realizations. Take care out there and whatever I choose see you in January with the next run.
Mystic
And thus my second run of LTU 5 has come to and end... I think it's time for a summary.
From my posts one might think this wasn't too successful of a run and they might be right, however it wasn't terrible. There has been better and worse days, however overall it was leading somewhere. My number one goal was achieved - I finally managed to get good work ethic, stopped working from home and developed habit of waking up early to be able to work where I should work. This decoupling made it so I finally could come back home and relax without worry. And given that I was able to do this with taking more projects on my shoulders than I should have was astonishing for me.
This had inverse effects of course. My sleep schedule was often hectic and leaving me with handful of hours of sleep per day, leading to exhaustion - the main cause of my anxiety and faul mood. When I got this into more order my mood improved almost immediately. I have less time for other interests, but I think it's obvious coming back from summer vacation season. Lots of my habits went to crap but that was sacrifice I was willing to take in order to keep going.
Other good news - I was able to keep my weight, a great issue for me as I was worried about yo-yo effect. Come spring I will want to burn the rest of my fat but that will need to wait for that time. My confidence is high and has been high since at least April - I never worry about my confidence or self-esteem nowadays. I never second-guess myself and approach challenges head-on. Well, maybe except for my love life...
This is an issue I was trying to deal with this entire run and I just couldn't. Last run I was pretending it didn't exist, now I tried to understand it and quite frankly I have failed. A radical change of framework is needed for this one and, who knows, maybe in a month or 2 I'll start to date again. Not because I think I'm ready yet, but because I think I did all I could from comfortable armchair perspective.
Sooo.... what's next? I want to have a month off, to look at things from a new perspective, set out new goals. One thing wrong with this sub idea is that... I feel like I'm expected to get results. For December I have no obligations, I can just do what I want if that makes sense. I don't feel obliged to self-improve. I will keep posting from time to time, I intend to write about my next run in the same journal.
I don't know what I want to run next. @Shannon and whoever else is willing to contribute - here's the question. Would it be better for me to run third LTU run or give newest DMSI version a shot? Or maybe some other sub, I'm not exactly following what hot right now. I'm looking for something that will keep challenging me and letting me cleanse myself of my anxieties and pushing me to experience more and new things. LTU is nice but third full run...? I'm afraid of diminishing returns. DMSI is also nice but how much will I get from it if I decide it's not time to enter the dating scene just yet?
Thanks everyone on this forum, I don't contribute much nowadays but I lurk from time to time and I love you guys and girls. I appreciate every comment and suggestion. And thank you for giving me the forum where I can share my oftentimes bizarre and convoluted realizations. Take care out there and whatever I choose see you in January with the next run.
Mystic
For not by numbers of men, nor by measure of body, but by valor of soul is war to be decided.
~Belisarius, the last Roman
Certitude is for the puzzle-box logicians and girls of white glamour [...]. I am a letter written in uncertainty.
~36 Lessons of Vivec, Sermon 4
~Belisarius, the last Roman
Certitude is for the puzzle-box logicians and girls of white glamour [...]. I am a letter written in uncertainty.
~36 Lessons of Vivec, Sermon 4
