Shifting Gears (LTU 5.0)

[DavisMind91]

For myself, I wasn't emotionless.  The first days I had too much emotion, so I intentionally tried to stifle it.  That was uncomfortable.  When tears finally came through, I let them out, and with it, the fear I'd lose control every time I felt strong emotions brewing.  

Emotionless AND remarkably tired says you may be trying to repress emotions, so I mention this.  They did come on hard and fast, so I was scared initially.    

I like your journals, so I look forward to reading your LTU experiences.

Thanks for reading, now that you mention it, it’s true that I do have a habit of emotional repression on a regular basis. Most times though, I don’t feel very emotional at all. Sometimes I’ve been so calm that I ask myself if there’s anything wrong with me. Over time I think I realized that I just have a greater sense of inner peace than most ppl I encounter, but when I actually to feel emotions deeper, I tend to repress them in order to protect myself in some way.