10-24-2018, 12:56 AM
I woke up with an awareness this morning, having run E2 on US all night. I bought USLM already, but mostly since Shannon said he wasn't sure if FRM would increase in value, thus increasing the price of subs. I've considered running USLM come Halloween.
I also knew when I bought it that my main goals were mostly emotionally related: relationships with others, myself, and reachable goals I've had.
I'm going to extend my run on E2. It is slower than all subs built after, but the training to heal, the encouragement to heal, me seeing opportunities to heal, and even overcoming the victim mentality are HUGE for me. I want peace. With myself. With others. Well, it all points back to seeking peace with myself. I'm leaving this door open here, as it's why I'm running subs anyway.
I'll admit my biggest fear writing this was an imagined criticism by other males. Seeing them shaming me. Hmmm.... maybe it's something which I've needed to work on, or rather, let E2 work on. This makes healing so much easier. I'll stick with it.
I also knew when I bought it that my main goals were mostly emotionally related: relationships with others, myself, and reachable goals I've had.
I'm going to extend my run on E2. It is slower than all subs built after, but the training to heal, the encouragement to heal, me seeing opportunities to heal, and even overcoming the victim mentality are HUGE for me. I want peace. With myself. With others. Well, it all points back to seeking peace with myself. I'm leaving this door open here, as it's why I'm running subs anyway.
I'll admit my biggest fear writing this was an imagined criticism by other males. Seeing them shaming me. Hmmm.... maybe it's something which I've needed to work on, or rather, let E2 work on. This makes healing so much easier. I'll stick with it.
I want to be FREE!
