DMSI vs SM

[JackOfHearts]

I haven't used SM, only WM.

But 'deviant' is just a judgement. It sounds like you were just becoming more comfortable sexually and judging yourself for it.

I don't know if WM made me feminine, but it made me just enjoy talking to girls. Had them sending me nudes, but for some reason it was difficult to meet up with some of them. Some of that was distance, but even one close was sending videos and nudes but cancelled twice when we were meant to meet up.

The problem I found with WM is that I started just enjoying most women and just wanting them for the expression of loving women, that's the best I can explain it. So even the ugly ones there would be this weird connection and i'd want to **** them. Then i'd be like "what the ****". It was like it brought my standards down, but not exactly.. kind of like I found other things about them to enjoy even if they were pretty ***** ugly.

Made you more feminine is a judgement too, I have been reprimanded here for calling someone behavior feminine here once. For me it wasn't to put him down as I consider feminine behavior normal in men as to me we are both feminine and masculine. So to me in some circumstances feminine behavior is what should be done and there is no way you can do otherwise. For example dating and looking for a relationship is a feminine behavior to me, nothing wrong with that, going to work would be a masculine behavior. Listening would be feminine, talking would be masculine. What I would consider "wrong" for a man would be to look only for relationship and to never work (unless his work is related to relationship) Also a man have a weak feminine side when he can't listen to you, or it's very hard for him to do so (this is how I see feminine and masculine)

I guess it depends on how we see things and how we attached meaning to words.
I admit deviant goes more to the bad extreme , that's why I would say it's more how people will perceive you, how you will appear to others.
For example in Dzeemo pictures while he was on SM3 we could see an expression on his face and I don't remember who started saying that but we called this vibe the "killer vibe", no one had any problem with that name, as it appears cool to have that sort of vibe I guess
I also noticed while doing SM3 that some people were afraid of me literally, sometimes I would look at them and they would have this reaction "wow" like I was about to get very mean at them, but to me I was just neutraly looking at them. Also I even noticed it while looking at me in the mirror.
I have no way of knowing if the vibe is bad in itself or it's people who are extra sensitive. I do remember one of my friend very masculine, one of the most masculine man I know was getting afraid of me from time to time while on SM3, that guy is almost never afraid of anyone Also sometimes to play around my friends emotion I would say, "it's been a long time I didn't see an accident, I'm missing it" then I would describe an hypothetical accident happening in front of us, that's the kind of deviant thoughts I had in mind, maybe it's just me as I'm out of the norm to begin with and I have no problem seeing people die or the concept of dying or a family member dying. This is just an example but I had many things like that where I would do crazy things for fun. I was looking for the adrenaline shot. That part feels like the most fun part of SM3 actually as I feel like doing SM3 again just for those crazy things, and the super extra confident feeling.

I wouldn't mind making my standard a bit down, this hasn't happened yet. Also I always thought if I would get along with a girl very well I wouldn't mind fu** her even if she isn't super pretty, like a 6 I wouldn't mind, unless she is very ugly, especially the face. I look more at how her emotion appear on her face usually, like if she can't smile and her smile is very ugly it's something I can't do or would do but it would be harder to. Also it would be purely sexual if I do something at this point.

For example there was this blonde girl at my dancing class, to my friend she was very fu**able, but I said to him. "Did you see her smile, it's like a super depressive smile" I knew she was interested, I even had the opportunity to kiss her when I was alone with her, I wanted to try but the expression on her face was so emotionless/depressive that I couldn't do it. During that night my friend said she was looking at me lot. There was also her female friend interested but she literally smell like piss to me, she wasn't ugly but not my type at all.