11-01-2017, 09:57 PM
Well yesterday was the first day of my vacation. It went well as expected, haven’t been on the forum quite as much as I’m living it up right now. I still want to keep a consistent journal of course. With that being said however as of tomorrow I am finished with my E2 run. For the past week it feels like I’ve just been on maintenance mode with it. That’s obviously not a bad thing but I’m using the time until November 30th to allow my mind to assimilate and continue acting upon the instructions of E2. Best thing is the 30th is a day I have off work so my very first day of AM6 will be uninterrupted.
Now as for my wife, she’s been down and feeling as if she’s failed at everything this year. This is not true as she graduated a surgical tech program in August and landed a job in 2 weeks after graduation while her sister graduated over a year ago and still has no job in that field. Admittedly though, between our marriage falling apart and her Mom’s death a couple months ago, I can see how she’s taking it hard. She’s been acting strange the past couple of days, I know her and so I knew there was a motive behind it because though this sounds messed up I feel like she was being “too nice” towards me.
She wasn’t necessarily being manipulative but I knew she wanted something from me. While I was in the checkout line at Walmart she finally said that she wanted to move to Georgia and didn’t want to go without me. Part of this I’m sure is because she doesn’t want me to be too far away from my daughter which I wouldn’t want that either. Another thing is that she wants a fresh start, and well who doesn’t when they’re not where they want to be in life. I’ve been thinking about leaving Florida again for a while anyway so I said I would go, but given her past history of changing her mind pretty quickly I’m not taking her seriously at all.
Besides, at this point I don’t even see a full 1% chance of being together with her again. While she cried on the phone I didn’t feel sorrow like I usually would, In fact, my own sadness from the past, and any negativity that people tell me about in their own lives currently seems foreign to me. It’s not that I don’t care, I just feel light-hearted 99% of the time and encourage people to keep going. I gave her words of encouragement and instead of looking at her as weak like I have in the past, I simply reminded her of how strong I’ve seen her be.
Anyways, I’ve said enough here, my next post on this journal will likely be my last and it won’t be too long I’m sure. To anyone reading this, if you’re thinking of trying E2 then just do it, it’s a life changer.
Now as for my wife, she’s been down and feeling as if she’s failed at everything this year. This is not true as she graduated a surgical tech program in August and landed a job in 2 weeks after graduation while her sister graduated over a year ago and still has no job in that field. Admittedly though, between our marriage falling apart and her Mom’s death a couple months ago, I can see how she’s taking it hard. She’s been acting strange the past couple of days, I know her and so I knew there was a motive behind it because though this sounds messed up I feel like she was being “too nice” towards me.
She wasn’t necessarily being manipulative but I knew she wanted something from me. While I was in the checkout line at Walmart she finally said that she wanted to move to Georgia and didn’t want to go without me. Part of this I’m sure is because she doesn’t want me to be too far away from my daughter which I wouldn’t want that either. Another thing is that she wants a fresh start, and well who doesn’t when they’re not where they want to be in life. I’ve been thinking about leaving Florida again for a while anyway so I said I would go, but given her past history of changing her mind pretty quickly I’m not taking her seriously at all.
Besides, at this point I don’t even see a full 1% chance of being together with her again. While she cried on the phone I didn’t feel sorrow like I usually would, In fact, my own sadness from the past, and any negativity that people tell me about in their own lives currently seems foreign to me. It’s not that I don’t care, I just feel light-hearted 99% of the time and encourage people to keep going. I gave her words of encouragement and instead of looking at her as weak like I have in the past, I simply reminded her of how strong I’ve seen her be.
Anyways, I’ve said enough here, my next post on this journal will likely be my last and it won’t be too long I’m sure. To anyone reading this, if you’re thinking of trying E2 then just do it, it’s a life changer.
