DMSI is similar to E2 in that for some reason I had the urge to have less protein shakes. Well last week sometime I had one and felt a bit sick and had brainfog then I decided to stop having them on my off days in the afternoon.
Then I noticed for a few days coffee made me feel sick and gave me brain fog which it hasn't before. One possibility is that I started taking bentonite clay to detox and somehow it made me more sensitive.
For a few days I thought of doing so, and the feeling after coffee sunday was bad enough I decided I was giving it up. Yesterday was okay I just had an extra matcha tea.
Well today i'm sitting here and feeling like I didn't know what to do with myself, and more "I want to be with girls to feel better" come up. And I just stayed with that and it seemed to relax.
Then wanting coffee come up and I was just feeling like crap, and I gave in. I was like "Well I can't give up all these addictions at once, especially when i'm working on my biggest addiction.. addiction to girls and sex to make me feel better". Then "coffee is my only comfort at the moment, I have to have it" and went to make one.
Rationalizations.. yes most likely. But trying to deal with the big issue and not turn to girls for a while AND trying to give up coffee, seems that's a bit much of a combination right now.
Because I was feeling that I had to have SOMETHING otherwise I was just going to go mental. I feel alot better now drinking one, but I know.. it's only temporary. There's some emotional connection to the coffee, I also was pushed to give it up on E2 and went down from 2 a day to 1 which i'm still having and feel better for just 1 a day. Ideally i'd have none.
In general though I feel way better than yesterday. Reading some of John Cooper's book again helped last night.
EDIT: Fuck, now as soon as i've finished my coffee all of a sudden i'm wanting something else to 'fill me up' and make me feel better and my head feels slightly weird. Damn, how convincing the brain is.
Then I noticed for a few days coffee made me feel sick and gave me brain fog which it hasn't before. One possibility is that I started taking bentonite clay to detox and somehow it made me more sensitive.
For a few days I thought of doing so, and the feeling after coffee sunday was bad enough I decided I was giving it up. Yesterday was okay I just had an extra matcha tea.
Well today i'm sitting here and feeling like I didn't know what to do with myself, and more "I want to be with girls to feel better" come up. And I just stayed with that and it seemed to relax.
Then wanting coffee come up and I was just feeling like crap, and I gave in. I was like "Well I can't give up all these addictions at once, especially when i'm working on my biggest addiction.. addiction to girls and sex to make me feel better". Then "coffee is my only comfort at the moment, I have to have it" and went to make one.
Rationalizations.. yes most likely. But trying to deal with the big issue and not turn to girls for a while AND trying to give up coffee, seems that's a bit much of a combination right now.
Because I was feeling that I had to have SOMETHING otherwise I was just going to go mental. I feel alot better now drinking one, but I know.. it's only temporary. There's some emotional connection to the coffee, I also was pushed to give it up on E2 and went down from 2 a day to 1 which i'm still having and feel better for just 1 a day. Ideally i'd have none.
In general though I feel way better than yesterday. Reading some of John Cooper's book again helped last night.
EDIT: Fuck, now as soon as i've finished my coffee all of a sudden i'm wanting something else to 'fill me up' and make me feel better and my head feels slightly weird. Damn, how convincing the brain is.
