07-16-2017, 04:19 AM
(07-15-2017, 06:10 PM)kalmah0804 Wrote:(07-15-2017, 01:41 PM)mat422 Wrote: At work today and somehow the topic of discussion got onto how many times we've gotten laid in our life. So I just threw up a big fat 0 and my coworkers were shocked lol. They thought I pulled crazy amounts of girls. So yeah, where's the virgin club at? Cuz that's me. In all honesty I don't really care anymore. I used to be really afraid what girls would think if I was a virgin or other guys at 26 but it doesn't bother me now.
I think it's a combination of being afraid of getting intimate with women and also having relatively high standards. Like some guys will have sex with any type of girl just to get off. I was never like that. I probably had a few opportunities when I was younger but was either blind to it or didn't find myself attracted to her so I didn't go through with it.
But now my coworkers are all saying they need to find me a girl lol. So who knows, something might pop up in the near future. All I know is right now I'm still fighting with that resistance that's telling me I don't have time for women or that I have no interest in them. I know it's not true, it's just a clever tactic to hide behind the fear.
I only lost my virginity just a few short months ago. Pussy is extremely overrated. There are much more worthwhile pursuits you could be going after that could probably coincidentally get you laid. I literally felt zero difference when I had sex. Actually, I probably felt worse--like I had wasted so much energy in my life upset or feeling hopeless over the fact that I hadn't had sex.
I realize this is kind of just gonna go in one ear and out the other, but once you get laid you'll quickly realize what a big timesink it can be (unless, of course, it's with a really special girl).
To be honest it already seems like a huge timesink. I'm so wrapped up in my music anyway. I guess that's part of why I ran DMSI, it was a weak point of mine and I just wanted to strengthen it a bit. I really just want the choice of taking the opportunities or not. Right now it kind of feels like I'm avoiding it, so even if there are opportunities I don't go for it. Also I want to break this idea that sex needs some kind of deep emotional connection. I think that's a huge problem for me. I'm sure sex can be an emotional experience, but it doesn't have to be strictly tied to that. People often say casual sex is bad or damaging, but I think it's more like the guilt and shame surrounding it is damaging rather than the act itself.
