05-17-2017, 02:26 PM
Went with 2 loops of masked FLAC last night on sleep phones, 9/15 clicks volume.
First had a long dream where I was hanging out and having a good time with "A." Then, at the end of the dream, she shape-shifted into a tall, skinny, ugly dude.
Woke earlier than usual, felt good. My wife caught a little attitude with me, and I barked back at her. Barking + postpartum hormones & emotions = tear factory. I'm going to have to be a bit more mindful of my reactions.
A & B are night and day. I'm already more motivated to workout and eat for fuel, rather than pleasure. My energy also comes off way different. I almost ghosted all the chicks at the gym today...but...didn't? It's strange to describe. I felt like women were attracted, but were afraid that if they talked to me I'd eat them. Literally eat them.
Went to lunch with my wife and her best friend (that lives here). We had 4 kids at the table, 2 toddlers and 2 infants, lol. I ate with one hand, my wife pumped at the table, and I had to keep my son in line simultaneously. So this is how it's going to be, I guess! As you might guess, we had the attention of every female who walked by.
My wife's friend (who had just seen me Saturday at the hospital - while still running Version A) was quiet. You could tell that, whatever it was, she felt differently about me today and that it seemed uncomfortable. At one point I said I was going to take my son on a roller coaster this summer. She asked, "Where?" and immediately suggested we "all go together!!!"
After lunch, we went outside and sat down. This group of women came out and were taking a group picture. I had no idea how unbelievably hot one of them was until she started talking to me. She had to have been 10 years older, at least. I don't find older women appealing, generally, but this one had my immediate attention. It was my son who got them started talking to us. He just up and ran to them and started hugging them all (he's very, very friendly). They thought he was the best thing ever. The eldest (she was probably near 80 and had a Russian accent) was almost crying tears of joy, told us my son made her day, and then told my son she loved him! Pretty cute stuff.
But the ass on that other chick. Hell, the everything.
Other than that, I'll just mention my wife's almost 180 degree turn in sensitivity around me. I thought it was just hormones (which, I'm sure, are playing a role here), but it is too directly tied to my switch to B. It's like she's on edge around me. I'll have to dig a little deeper and see what's going on.
I'm also experiencing a lot more heat and hot flashes. I've been eating a lot more lately. Perhaps it's been putting the aura on overdrive.
Horniness factor is up by a factor of 10. Operation Pipe Cleaning might commence daily if this feeling is going to keep up!
Since switching to B, I haven't had the bursts of heart-felt-pure-joy around my daughter that I was initially. That's okay, because they were ridiculous swells. The love was so overwhelming, I just couldn't do anything other than tear-up. So now, it's like I'm more even-keeled. I don't know if that's what would have happened anyway (since she's 5 days old now, and it's not the first or second day). So while I still feel immense gratitude and joy, it's not over-the-top like it was a few days ago. I also find that where, on A, I had infinite patience for her little cries of hunger, that on B, I'm becoming more intolerant (nothing crazy, just a little annoyed at times) and more easily frustrated. Once again, I could just be settling back into - "Oh. That's right, it's a baby and it's going to cry. A lot."
I think I just need some time to even out on B again. We'll see.
First had a long dream where I was hanging out and having a good time with "A." Then, at the end of the dream, she shape-shifted into a tall, skinny, ugly dude.
Woke earlier than usual, felt good. My wife caught a little attitude with me, and I barked back at her. Barking + postpartum hormones & emotions = tear factory. I'm going to have to be a bit more mindful of my reactions.
A & B are night and day. I'm already more motivated to workout and eat for fuel, rather than pleasure. My energy also comes off way different. I almost ghosted all the chicks at the gym today...but...didn't? It's strange to describe. I felt like women were attracted, but were afraid that if they talked to me I'd eat them. Literally eat them.
Went to lunch with my wife and her best friend (that lives here). We had 4 kids at the table, 2 toddlers and 2 infants, lol. I ate with one hand, my wife pumped at the table, and I had to keep my son in line simultaneously. So this is how it's going to be, I guess! As you might guess, we had the attention of every female who walked by.
My wife's friend (who had just seen me Saturday at the hospital - while still running Version A) was quiet. You could tell that, whatever it was, she felt differently about me today and that it seemed uncomfortable. At one point I said I was going to take my son on a roller coaster this summer. She asked, "Where?" and immediately suggested we "all go together!!!"
After lunch, we went outside and sat down. This group of women came out and were taking a group picture. I had no idea how unbelievably hot one of them was until she started talking to me. She had to have been 10 years older, at least. I don't find older women appealing, generally, but this one had my immediate attention. It was my son who got them started talking to us. He just up and ran to them and started hugging them all (he's very, very friendly). They thought he was the best thing ever. The eldest (she was probably near 80 and had a Russian accent) was almost crying tears of joy, told us my son made her day, and then told my son she loved him! Pretty cute stuff.
But the ass on that other chick. Hell, the everything.
Other than that, I'll just mention my wife's almost 180 degree turn in sensitivity around me. I thought it was just hormones (which, I'm sure, are playing a role here), but it is too directly tied to my switch to B. It's like she's on edge around me. I'll have to dig a little deeper and see what's going on.
I'm also experiencing a lot more heat and hot flashes. I've been eating a lot more lately. Perhaps it's been putting the aura on overdrive.
Horniness factor is up by a factor of 10. Operation Pipe Cleaning might commence daily if this feeling is going to keep up!
Since switching to B, I haven't had the bursts of heart-felt-pure-joy around my daughter that I was initially. That's okay, because they were ridiculous swells. The love was so overwhelming, I just couldn't do anything other than tear-up. So now, it's like I'm more even-keeled. I don't know if that's what would have happened anyway (since she's 5 days old now, and it's not the first or second day). So while I still feel immense gratitude and joy, it's not over-the-top like it was a few days ago. I also find that where, on A, I had infinite patience for her little cries of hunger, that on B, I'm becoming more intolerant (nothing crazy, just a little annoyed at times) and more easily frustrated. Once again, I could just be settling back into - "Oh. That's right, it's a baby and it's going to cry. A lot."
I think I just need some time to even out on B again. We'll see.
