01-07-2012, 07:09 AM
Things have gotten depressing latley as I refer to my past posts in my journal.
I feel lost. When it come to woman and my life.
However, somewhere deep inside I feel peace. It's probably because of feeling unattached to most everything at this point. I'm still very much protecting my ego but last night after a period of self limiting thinking I watched half of Burt Harding's newest video and it really fucking opened my mind. It feels like his philosophy is to not worry about taking action but trust that you will do what is right if you just let go and relax into everything. Feel what you want to feel in this moment. For me every moment it would be peace because then It would lead to happiness. I feel like I always should be doing something. It's like I wasn't ok with not doing something before. I've been on Sex Magnet for 5 months now and I feel like I should have made change at this point. In my physical reality. I havn't but there has been mental change. What I have learned that I need to change is how I receive things. As I type this it seems so weird.. but I need to allow everything. I'm probably being redundant now because I've told myself this and posted this kind of stuff before. I guess I keep thinking that it's not enough to trust myself and open to everything else. It's like I still want to make things complicated for myself.
After Sex magnet... I figure I'll run disconnect from negativity and either socializing is just a fun game or end self sabatoge.
I feel lost. When it come to woman and my life.
However, somewhere deep inside I feel peace. It's probably because of feeling unattached to most everything at this point. I'm still very much protecting my ego but last night after a period of self limiting thinking I watched half of Burt Harding's newest video and it really fucking opened my mind. It feels like his philosophy is to not worry about taking action but trust that you will do what is right if you just let go and relax into everything. Feel what you want to feel in this moment. For me every moment it would be peace because then It would lead to happiness. I feel like I always should be doing something. It's like I wasn't ok with not doing something before. I've been on Sex Magnet for 5 months now and I feel like I should have made change at this point. In my physical reality. I havn't but there has been mental change. What I have learned that I need to change is how I receive things. As I type this it seems so weird.. but I need to allow everything. I'm probably being redundant now because I've told myself this and posted this kind of stuff before. I guess I keep thinking that it's not enough to trust myself and open to everything else. It's like I still want to make things complicated for myself.
After Sex magnet... I figure I'll run disconnect from negativity and either socializing is just a fun game or end self sabatoge.
"To love completely and hold onto nothing-that is the only freedom." -David Deida
"If at first glance it may appear too hard, look again. Always look again." - Unknown
If you would like to get in touch with me, please send me an email.
"If at first glance it may appear too hard, look again. Always look again." - Unknown
If you would like to get in touch with me, please send me an email.
