My goodness. I had an epic internal battle today, which left me feeling anxious.
L looked into my eyes after we haven't seen each other in a week. She said "you look SAD!"
I was jolted out of a nap by the anxiety. I was day dreaming about when this girl came and sat on my lap during sm3, and then the anxiety hit me. It felt like the Spartans defending against the Egyptians. My subconscious is defending something, knowing it is going to lose, but doubling down anyway and putting up a fight. Resulting in a state of fear and panic. I started welling up in my eyes. This fear and panic came from nowhere, and after doing some writing about it with L, we discovered it has its roots in financial insecurity.
Shannon's words echo in my head. They went something along the lines of "3.1 will cause you to haveto be willing to change EVERYTHING if you are expecting to achieve the goals of the program"....... here we go. I think my financial situation is going to go on a wild ride here in a bit. I may end up quitting my day job in favor of something else. Notably the side job I picked up on week 1 of 3.1, thanks to US/LM.
Not gonna lie I feel like a scared little child right now,
L looked into my eyes after we haven't seen each other in a week. She said "you look SAD!"
I was jolted out of a nap by the anxiety. I was day dreaming about when this girl came and sat on my lap during sm3, and then the anxiety hit me. It felt like the Spartans defending against the Egyptians. My subconscious is defending something, knowing it is going to lose, but doubling down anyway and putting up a fight. Resulting in a state of fear and panic. I started welling up in my eyes. This fear and panic came from nowhere, and after doing some writing about it with L, we discovered it has its roots in financial insecurity.
Shannon's words echo in my head. They went something along the lines of "3.1 will cause you to haveto be willing to change EVERYTHING if you are expecting to achieve the goals of the program"....... here we go. I think my financial situation is going to go on a wild ride here in a bit. I may end up quitting my day job in favor of something else. Notably the side job I picked up on week 1 of 3.1, thanks to US/LM.
Not gonna lie I feel like a scared little child right now,
