01-18-2017, 03:08 PM
Started stage 3 yesterday and I'm already hitting some massive resistance. Is stage 3 when the actual alpha programming kicks in? I'm thinking it is. There's a lot of shame coming up about being a powerful respected person. I want all the effects of being dominant without actually being dominant? Yeah that doesn't make any sense, my old self is fighting this tooth and nail. I can feel the program leak through at times, I catch myself with slower movements, I give off this vibe of relaxed energy like I expect everyone around me to respect me, and then I snap away from it because I feel like I'm being cocky or full of myself. Like it's bad to be this way.
In my own head it's fine to be emotionally healthy, but for some reason going one step above that and really standing out gives me a feeling of it being bad or wrong. I'm probably just overthinking this again and my comfort zone is being pushed and my subconscious doesn't like it. Coming up with reasons like I'm losing myself or becoming a jerk, anything to throw off my progress. I've ran away from too much in my life, I won't run from this it's too important to me.
In my own head it's fine to be emotionally healthy, but for some reason going one step above that and really standing out gives me a feeling of it being bad or wrong. I'm probably just overthinking this again and my comfort zone is being pushed and my subconscious doesn't like it. Coming up with reasons like I'm losing myself or becoming a jerk, anything to throw off my progress. I've ran away from too much in my life, I won't run from this it's too important to me.
