Spiral's Sex Magnet 2011 journal

[Spiral]

Well, I've hit some resistance in stage 3. Seems like the first real phase. I feel pretty disconnected and carefree which in some cases is good for this development. In other ways I'm horny as hell (not today though) but I'm also somewhat needy. I'm still insecure about being out alone but It's easy for me to relax and just do what I want to do. I think the insecurity stems from the fact that I don't socialize with others because I really could care less. I don't care for people because the majority are idiots. Please, none of you take offense because as far as I'm concerned none of you are idiots. And I'm also introverted and have been for my whole life so going out of my way to have casual conversation with people is out of the ordinary. Maybe that's why it's a challenge for me to actually make friends in the real world. The majority of everyone is introverted and most of them aren't really happy with their life. I know I can come on in and light up their world but I don't care. I should read more of David Deida and continue to meditate for giving love without expectation is the ultimate freedom (refer to my signature) And as far as women... I've had the drive to just make them feel great before in stage 3 but right now It's not there. The boldness and motivation has died off a little but it's alright. This is part of the process.

And Patti, the women I mentioned in my previous post were 40+ but were acting like little girls around me which was very fun and refreshing for me. One was married and the other engaged. Even though I would totally have had sex with both of them... I am just not that person right now. I'm not going to go out of my way to sleep with one of these women. And since I was working... it wouldn't have happened. Now if there was some down time and they had an assistant that was more my age I'll be damned if something wild didn't go down.