11-24-2016, 07:21 AM
I really wasn't expecting it to kick in so quickly!
3 days in and while I've always thought of improvements in terms of how my fear is dissolving - I'm noticing a stark absence of shame for the first time. I didn't even realise previously how much it deprives me of life. feeling literally blissful but also concerned (expected) about how I act from this space.
In terms of results so far
- rediscovering how I used to approach things as a child, working and exploring things purely through fascination, wonder and flow; it occurs to me that this is a core motive force for work when negativity isn't in play.
- noticing the relationship between me and my partner is far more loving, happy and attentive
- absence of fear in goals I'm setting
- at work I'm more curious about what I'm doing and more enthused by it, though this is offset by a desire to enjoy myself so I'm finding myself enjoying listening to music and doing what work I feel like (which could turn problematic)
-refusal to do myself down/criticise myself
Seems like a good start, though yesterday I was finding myself annoyed because I wasn't working like I should (too chilled). after meditating it occurred that I'm just not working because I don't really want to, and because I don't really want to and I've been forcing myself, which is kind of like being at war with myself. So today I'm just like fine, if I don't want to work I won't, but let me find why I want to and go at it from there, which seems to kinda work, it's still getting there though.
3 days in and while I've always thought of improvements in terms of how my fear is dissolving - I'm noticing a stark absence of shame for the first time. I didn't even realise previously how much it deprives me of life. feeling literally blissful but also concerned (expected) about how I act from this space.
In terms of results so far
- rediscovering how I used to approach things as a child, working and exploring things purely through fascination, wonder and flow; it occurs to me that this is a core motive force for work when negativity isn't in play.
- noticing the relationship between me and my partner is far more loving, happy and attentive
- absence of fear in goals I'm setting
- at work I'm more curious about what I'm doing and more enthused by it, though this is offset by a desire to enjoy myself so I'm finding myself enjoying listening to music and doing what work I feel like (which could turn problematic)
-refusal to do myself down/criticise myself
Seems like a good start, though yesterday I was finding myself annoyed because I wasn't working like I should (too chilled). after meditating it occurred that I'm just not working because I don't really want to, and because I don't really want to and I've been forcing myself, which is kind of like being at war with myself. So today I'm just like fine, if I don't want to work I won't, but let me find why I want to and go at it from there, which seems to kinda work, it's still getting there though.
Your task is not to seek for Love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.
