Shannon's Journal Discussion

[Shannon]

Shannon, do you think believing you're high value is all you need to be high value?

You ask that question like it has a short or simple answer.

The first and primary step to being high value is going to be accepting yourself as having high value.

Most people consider themselves "high value" (in what way?) because someone else told them enough times that they are sexually attractive. In this sense, high value is determined by others, but they are only parroting what you express to the world (to a large degree).

You take the very same man, and put him in nice clothes, groom him, make him have good posture and give him confident body language and an attitude based on believing that he is as good as or better than anyone else in value, etc. and he will be universally rated many points higher on the attractiveness scale than that very same man who is sporting a mindset of failure, negativity, hopelessness, thinking he's worthless and ugly, etc., wearing dirty and ratty clothes, slumped over, unwashed....

So is he a 4 or an 8?

Looks do matter, but they are far from everything. And the looks you were born with can also be adjusted by these very factors. Why do you suppose I take the time every day to shave my head and face? It's because when I do, I am more physically attractive than when I don't. Why do I brush my teeth every day? Same thing. Mossy teeth are not attractive. But it's the exact same person.

Ultimately, only you can determine your actual value. Whether you determine it based on how others tell you you look and what value they assign you, or your own assessment, others will decide what you look like and how high value you are based on a lot of factors, and those all ultimately are based on what you think of yourself.

Even a scary ugly "1" can become a 3 or 4 by taking care of themselves, having the right attitude, and influencing others by showing them that they are more than just their looks.

Telling yourself you are "high value" and genuinely believing it independent of what anyone else says, does or thinks is a big difference. When it becomes genuinely true in your awareness and mind, it will eventually become true outside of you.

How important do you think positive reinforcement is, because I don't think anyone can get very far without it.

And by high value I don't just mean by women, by society as a whole.

Positive reinforcement is important depending on how well you have mastered your understanding of where your value actually comes from.

If your value pretends to come from within (internal), but really comes from what others say (external) then sure, positive reinforcement will be important and necessary.

If your value comes entirely from within, because it is your genuine and complete internal reality, then positive reinforcement externally is unnecessary. It is because it is. Mountains don't need valleys to remind them of or validate who and what they are.

I think I might have to disagree with you on this. Human beings aren't mountains, we're social creatures more than anything, we can't resist that fact anymore than we can resist wanting to ****, eat or sleep.

Everyone who thinks they're high value in the real world had their self esteem instilled and reinforced by the people around them, whether that's their family or strangers. How can you duplicate that and then maintain it without positive reinforcement? Even the guys here who are listening to DMSI day and night are constantly looking for positive reinforcement in the real world.

There's a book called the outliers by Malcolm Gladwell, his argument is that every successful person is where they are because of where they came from, what's socially acceptable where they came from and the values and attitudes they were raised on. He's studied many successful people (who he highlights in his book) and shows that there's always some kind of momentum to someone's success, they were encouraged in some way as kids or they stumbled upon something they spent years practising on and became masters at it, there's always momentum.

Right now I feel like these subs are drugs, something to take the edge off but they aren't really life-changing, the promise of these subs are life changing, but if I'm being honest with myself I haven't really achieved life-changing results, like being able to live my dream life, or take care of problems stemming from family that I've been dealing with all my life.

I think you should take another look at outliers, there's a very important wisdom in it.

You lost me the moment you said "Outliers". That book is based on logical fallacy after logical fallacy. It is, in my opinion, garbage thinking. You need to really understand critical thinking and understand a lot of variables that are and are not discussed in the book to see that, but it boils down to a faulty argument based on logical fallacies based on incomplete information and understanding. Convincing or not, that's what it is.

As for whether to subs are life changing, what has that got to do with the original point? And I would say a lot of people will disagree with you that they are not really life changing. But whatever, that's not the point of the post you replied to anyway.

If you have never seen something, that does not make it fictional. If you don't understand how something could work, it does not become impossible. So what I said is currently outside your reality, and you disagree, but that doesn't make it less true. I don't expect everyone to agree with me, and a lot of people don't. That's life. I'm willing to agree to disagree.