11-11-2016, 07:52 PM
I gotta say something. Taking up the journey of running this sub is both exciting and daunting at the same time. There's a lot I need to improve in my life. I've been full on hermit mode these past few years. I convinced myself I was content with just my music and my few close friends. But that lifestyle is so confining, I cut myself off from all the amazing things this world has to offer. I'm not saying I need to become a super extrovert, but I need to stop hiding behind my introversion as an excuse not to explore the world more. If I'm spending alone time with myself I want it to be because I made the choice, not because I'm too afraid to go out there. It's too easy to convince yourself you don't really want something by staying in your comfort zone.
Maybe it's E2 or maybe it's AM 6 already kicking in, but I've become more aware of what needs to change in my life. And I'm starting to work on it more instead of hiding behind fear and lying to myself that everything is fine the way it is. There's a lot to work on though, that's why it's so daunting. Career, friends, girls, music, physical health, financial stuff, etc. I look at my life and it's like I've just been stalling for the longest time and now I just have a backlog of all this stuff I have to catch up on. It turns out you can't really find happiness just meditating in your room convincing yourself you don't need all that stuff. If I could go back in time I'd shake my younger self and tell him to do stupid stuff, make mistakes, stop trying to figure out life so much and stop being so serious. All that time I thought I was cultivating some deep knowledge that would put me ahead in life, but I failed to balance it with enough action and actually put it to use.
Maybe it's E2 or maybe it's AM 6 already kicking in, but I've become more aware of what needs to change in my life. And I'm starting to work on it more instead of hiding behind fear and lying to myself that everything is fine the way it is. There's a lot to work on though, that's why it's so daunting. Career, friends, girls, music, physical health, financial stuff, etc. I look at my life and it's like I've just been stalling for the longest time and now I just have a backlog of all this stuff I have to catch up on. It turns out you can't really find happiness just meditating in your room convincing yourself you don't need all that stuff. If I could go back in time I'd shake my younger self and tell him to do stupid stuff, make mistakes, stop trying to figure out life so much and stop being so serious. All that time I thought I was cultivating some deep knowledge that would put me ahead in life, but I failed to balance it with enough action and actually put it to use.
