10-13-2016, 07:59 PM
(10-13-2016, 04:07 PM)Frosted Wrote: Shannon, consciously I think I'm this nice, sensitive guy but then if I notice my body language I'm this irreverent alpha. It's very weird. It's like from the head up I'm a barbie but then I look down and see this ripped alpha stud body and I'm like wtf? Or like how sometimes I'll feel insecure yet people will react to me like I'm the shit or girls will throw signs of attraction at me. I think this has something to do with the dissonance between the conscious and subconscious minds. This has been the same on my first AM6 run as well as now on my second. Is this something that is normal, takes time, or will be fixed with 6g? It would be really cool if I could realize how much of a badass I am like other people seem to already have.
Just takes time for your new reality to settle in. You haven't run DMSI yet, but when you do, you'll get to experience the reality shifting tech -- which does take you by surprise at first (imagine what you're experiencing times two). Take a look at Sarge's journal, I think he's actually kinda going through it right now, where he feels he's losing his personality and becoming boring, but from reading his posts, I think it's the opposite (don't let it go to your head, Sarge).
I had the same thing happen on both AM6 and DMSI. Feeling like I'm "not alpha," but then having people react like it. I even had an incident today -- now that I was off v2.4 and the code was running -- where I was complaining to my boxing coach about how insanely hard two of the other boxers were hitting me. Now, I ain't no bitch, but it was "10%" sparring match, meaning we use 10% force and they were going like 75% when I was still following the rules. The coach literally laughed at me and said: "Dude, are you serious? These guys are absolutely terrified of you because of your size and how good your form and technique is."
Didn't even realize it until after he said that. Mentally, I was viewing myself as the dude being picked on. According to the coach, they're thinking the same thing.
It'll settle in eventually.
