09-27-2016, 11:10 PM
(This post was last modified: 09-27-2016, 11:14 PM by JackOfHearts.)
(09-19-2016, 03:57 PM)Dubls Wrote: I need a pep talk. I hate to admit that because a) I have high expectations of myself and b) it's like talking to a therapist - you know you're going to feel better, but then you're like why couldn't I do that for myself?I lived the same thing once but I did the opposite I moved very fast because she was potentially DTF. And at the end it was just a trap from her.
So a little backstory. I got a server's # and it was the tightest game I've ever spit. I surprised myself. My frame was incredibly strong. I also have a lead from Tinder. The server is probably an 8 or 9 in my book, and the Tinder girl is a 6, maybe a 6.5. The server has shit tested me plenty in conversation, while Tinder girl laughs at everything I say. Tinder girl is in her late teens, server is in her 20s. Feels like the server is slipping only after a few days because I haven't made a definitive plan to go out with her. I should assume she has other suitors, with more experience and killer instinct than me.
Recently I talked about a girl that pursued me in the beginning and was almost explicitly dtf, but I waited too long to meet up and she moved on. I think she lost respect for me because I didn't move quickly. The server's tone has changed and I sense that if I don't try to meet up with her this week, she's lost. As it turns out, I'm going to have the house to myself, which is the perfect opportunity for both of these girls, but I'm choking like I usually do.
SM3 unlocked the ability in me to get to this point, but the results are not yet consistent and I'm still fighting them. I guess part of me is freaking out because I'm closer than ever to having success with women and this is what my insecurities have had me running from all these years. All I have to do is set up a date and I feel paralyzed to do so. I'm angry at that part of myself that's ok with letting these girls slip. Guys who get laid want this and there's no internal conflict. I bet there are guys reading who are like, I don't understand, just **** them why is this is even a thing? It's so ridiculous that I'm kicking and screaming every step of the way. Clearly I want to indulge my irrational fears more than I want to face **** a leggy blonde.
So here I am on the cusp of letting another one get away, trying to reframe the situation in mind that if I don't act, I am disrespecting myself as a person and as a man; an infringement of my self-respect being way more unacceptable than losing the respect of any woman.
Be careful with that, sometimes we can go too far into another direction and make our self too vulnerable. I moved too fast, I didn't think straight and logical.
A lot of girls want us to move the fastest possible, with no respect for the men, because sometimes it's not humanly possible to do it, be careful with that kind of girls. You may become a slave to her unconsciously. Exactly like a dog trained to react when the trainer wants to. I say that because I was in that kind of situation once. I realized she was giving me impossible task just to see me fail and complain afterwards.
All that to say it's okay sometimes to not move too quickly. The limit between too fast and too slow is hard to see when we are beginners. We have to stay logical in those situation. It's safe to say you are probably going to do some mistake and it's okay to do them as you are learning.
