The Modern Libertine's diary

[Cortez]

All of these fears are being pulled up and all I can say is that it really is wonderful. I spent far too many years living in my comfort zone and these past 5 years have been a gradual and sometimes startling coming out of that comfort zone, but really only in the past year have I really started facing fears and it's quickly become one of my favorite activities. The fact that this sub(or a combination of the sub and my own desire) is outright FORCING me out of my comfort zone is an entirely refreshing experience and I don't find uncomfortable at all. In fact, I find a certain comfort in being uncomfortable now, because I know that I am growing. When I get too comfortable, I start to get irritated and that's the way it needs to be for a while. The funny thing about your comfort zone is that it only contains what you're used to and not what you actually want. If anything you can say that your fears are a sort of compass guiding towards what you want sometimes. In short, this sub is helping me to grow tremendously. I can feel that. Some days feel a little off and I'm incredibly tired, but that tells me that it's working. It's the feeling of a mental workout. This sub is no joke.


Oh, and I forgot to mention the new friend I randomly met at the grocery store the the other day. This is one of those chance encounters or manifestations if you will. I've been saying that I want to go sky diving soon and so I randomly meet this lady who is an active sky diver, start talking to her for a while, make friends with her and whenever I'm ready. she'll point me in the direction of the place she goes to. It's amazing, the friends you meet when you're open to it.