08-25-2019, 11:14 PM
Stage 3, day 25:
Tinder girl did finally flake. I think that her reason was genuine as she did offer that we do it next week-end. It was kinda a relief for me... I was choking too on my side. I hate being in standby and was about to tell her myself to forget about it for our hook-up plans. maybe I'm starting to feel that this is heading toward a girl wanting more than just casual and I'm becoming less interested with this option dangling around...
The nurse did text me too to see how I was going. She did annoy me when she did ask if I was ever doing the first step to see someone.
I told her that she left me the impression that she was busy and had no time to see me therefore I was waiting that she does initiate something when she becomes available.
What she did next is something. She did flip the accusation and told me that it was my fault because I am always busy.
I said: not true. tell me 1 time when you wanted to see me and I didn't put effort to make it happen.
She has been evasive non specific saying: oh one time you said that you were busy...
I didn't argue more because it was pointless but after I said: so if you want to see me this week, I could make myself available. to which she said that she was insanely busy and couldn't meet me this week.
This got me annoyed. She is wasting my time so I told her: no problem. Just realize that you have given me this type of answer the last 2-3 times that I express my desire to see you. This is precisely why I'm not making the first move to see you anymore. Wait to have time for me before contacting me.
I have been non-reactive for a while but I thought that it was time to draw a line in the sand. You don't waste my time. I'm not interested in your non-sexual companionship. Only contact me if you want to see me. Otherwise leave me alone.
So if I summarize the current situation. I have 2 girls that I had sex with that keep orbiting around me but are withholding sex. I can only speculate that maybe they think that if they are able sustain a platonic relation long enough with me, this will qualify me as LTR material because if I was only into casual, I would have cut them loose much faster. In fact, I tolerate them because I'm not thirsty for sex... With enough partners around... I shouldn't care if 2 girls are only willing to have sex only once per month as long as I have more options...
I have been talking a lot about those 2 girls in this journal (almost exclusively).... I guess that it is a sign that I need to meet new ones...
Tinder girl did finally flake. I think that her reason was genuine as she did offer that we do it next week-end. It was kinda a relief for me... I was choking too on my side. I hate being in standby and was about to tell her myself to forget about it for our hook-up plans. maybe I'm starting to feel that this is heading toward a girl wanting more than just casual and I'm becoming less interested with this option dangling around...
The nurse did text me too to see how I was going. She did annoy me when she did ask if I was ever doing the first step to see someone.
I told her that she left me the impression that she was busy and had no time to see me therefore I was waiting that she does initiate something when she becomes available.
What she did next is something. She did flip the accusation and told me that it was my fault because I am always busy.
I said: not true. tell me 1 time when you wanted to see me and I didn't put effort to make it happen.
She has been evasive non specific saying: oh one time you said that you were busy...
I didn't argue more because it was pointless but after I said: so if you want to see me this week, I could make myself available. to which she said that she was insanely busy and couldn't meet me this week.
This got me annoyed. She is wasting my time so I told her: no problem. Just realize that you have given me this type of answer the last 2-3 times that I express my desire to see you. This is precisely why I'm not making the first move to see you anymore. Wait to have time for me before contacting me.
I have been non-reactive for a while but I thought that it was time to draw a line in the sand. You don't waste my time. I'm not interested in your non-sexual companionship. Only contact me if you want to see me. Otherwise leave me alone.
So if I summarize the current situation. I have 2 girls that I had sex with that keep orbiting around me but are withholding sex. I can only speculate that maybe they think that if they are able sustain a platonic relation long enough with me, this will qualify me as LTR material because if I was only into casual, I would have cut them loose much faster. In fact, I tolerate them because I'm not thirsty for sex... With enough partners around... I shouldn't care if 2 girls are only willing to have sex only once per month as long as I have more options...
I have been talking a lot about those 2 girls in this journal (almost exclusively).... I guess that it is a sign that I need to meet new ones...