JAKE'S EHPRA 2.0

[Jake2015]

Day 6 of No E2 continued....


Shannon has replied to a reply I had written to someone else on his journal (post #4698) and then my reply to that is (#4703)

Please read if you havent.

Shannons reply wasnt what I expected and it was awesome to hear from him so I'm waiting on him, in the hope that I can better understand what he suggests.

I hope others don't feel I'm disregarding their advice because I'm not, I have bought IYGSH and I am well I was more than ready to start it from tomorrow night.

Shannon from what I understand however is still suggesting I instead purchase DMSI and use that, why I'm not completely clear on so waiting on his reply.

However I've been honest with him as to the varied advice I've received from members here which I sincerely appreciate and will see what he says.

He is the creator of these subs and knows what is in what. He also believes in my case there is some hard core resistance. I believe he attributed that to some form of trauma in my early years and to be absolutely honest I cannot remember any trauma in my life.

Okay ill be honest there is 1 image that has been popping into my head, an image of a man an old white man with dirty long yellow nails. Ive no idea who this man is, or whether he is real or imaginary. I have an image of him in our living room/lounge when I as maybe 3 or 4 or 5.

I have no idea who he is, or if its in my mind. I also know my parents wouldnt let any stranger into our home or allow me to be alone with anyone, and I know that my parents were always around anyway since they worked from home.

So I'm confused and unsure if my mind is trying to justify and create a trauma or not.

In all honesty my whole childhood has had its stress and issues like any family however trauma well no thank god nothing comes to mind.

So yeah I'm still lost about that but to be honest I'm trying to sort myself out for university.

It made sense to me as per other peoples advice too to not waste time on E2 or DMSI but to get a sub specific for uni i.e. IYGSH.

so I'm waiting on shannon before I start a sub....watch this space

[Jake2015]

ok so the plan hasnt changed, ill put the complete post here for you all to read so that it helps anyone else.

For me rather than getting healing on issues within that may not be related to school, I have to focus on anything and everything that can help me or potentially help me to get off my procrastinating ass and get working, so I'm going to start with IYGSH on Sunday night/Monday Morning and keep doing it UNTIL MLS arrives as that will give more clearing/healing and will be suited for school too I believe.

here...

I'm not advising you to do DMSI if that will focus you in directions other than what you need right now - and it will not focus you on studying. IYGSH will try, but it's not even as powerful as E2. So if some part of you wants to resist for some reason... well, you won't go far.

DMSI on the other hand won't focus you on school, but it will be the best possible way to try to get past resistance and do some serious healing.

As I said beyond that, the choice is yours. I can't make it for you.

So the option is to either try and get some healing which may not be related to school with DMSI or try IYGSH which could be school related but ma not work or it may?

have I understood this correctly?

That is what I am saying.

ah ok thank you, then I have to try IYGSH as school is my utmost priority at the moment

[Jake2015]

Day 7 of No E2 has finally arrived.

So today, I woke at 12pm and didn't really get out of bed until 2hours later at 2pm.

This seems to be my current trend, staying in bed for 2hours. Not sure why, hope it not depression and just how my body is after waking up in the morning.

I then came on the computer straight away and surfed the net/facebook and now here.

I will get up, eat, shower, and get moving on tasks for today.

Im clearly avoiding studying, I'm afraid there is that there and why am I afraid I've no idea, but logic would say its probably a fear of failure, what do you all think?

I also start IYGSH tonight, and this thread will come to a close.

thank you

I forgot to mention a dream I had. Its not fully clear to me but in this dream I seem to be seducing an older woman, a milf probably, sexy attractive but submissive and afraid of going against her faith or morality, not sure which.

Either way I don't recall much more than getting a kiss and thats all I remember and I woke, but there was not more than that I'm sure.

Odd, it doesn't seem related to anything so perhaps not of significance at all.

[Jake2015]

update:

Procrastination, procrastination procrasti....ah you get the drift

[Jake2015]

The End of this thread....

I don't believe there is anything new that can be added to this thread now.

I have reached the 7th day of NO E2 and now its time to begin IYGSH.

I will start to play that at midnight tonight, either US if I'm in bed or via headphones/masked.

I want to thank you all that have read this thread and have been with me on this E2 journey.

It hasnt been easy, there have been many stops and starts, many ups and downs but its time to face my demons, and realise that its time to move to IYGSH and beyond.

The level of procrastination that I'm facing is upsetting to me and even though I know DMSI would reach inner resistance theres no guarantee it will help with this facet of my life which is what I need urgently.

So that being said this thread will now close and a new will begin.

Please do follow me on that thread, even though that is a 4G sub, I will still need your guidance, support and advice as I continue.......


Here is the thread: http://subliminal-talk.com/thread-8803-p...#pid169057


...... and advice as I continue my journey and all I now have to say is this....

And now, the end is near
And so I face the final curtain
My friend, I'll say it clear
I'll state my case, of which I'm certain

I've lived a life that's full
I've traveled each and every highway
But more, much more than this
I did it my way

Regrets, I've had a few
But then again, too few to mention
I did what I had to do
And saw it through without exemption

I planned each charted course
Each careful step along the byway
And more, much more than this
I did it my way

Yes, there were times, I'm sure you knew
When I bit off more than I could chew
But through it all, when there was doubt
I ate it up and spit it out
I faced it all and I stood tall
And did it my way

I've loved, I've laughed and cried
I've had my fill my share of losing
And now, as tears subside
I find it all so amusing

To think I did all that
And may I say - not in a shy way
Oh no, oh no, not me
I did it my way

For what is a man, what has he got
If not himself, then he has naught
To say the things he truly feels
And not the words of one who kneels
The record shows I took the blows
And did it my way

Yes, it was my way

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6E2hYDIFDIU