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+--- Thread: DARWIN LTU-6 (/Thread-DARWIN-LTU-6)
DARWIN LTU-6 - Darwin - 08-13-2020
Hi all,
SO after a good break from IML subs I am back with a new name (I had some funny issues with my original account which reverted back to the first name I used when on this site - crazy to think that was SEVEN YEARS AGO!!!!)
I like to think back to that time, it was intense to say the least and in the years following I had a blast with IML subs which took me to some incredible dark and fascinating places as well as helping me to clear out blocks to joy, love and beautiful relationships.
LTU 3 was one of the first subs I ever tried and it gave to me the first rest from self criticism I had known from early childhood, it was what convinced me to invest in AM6 and the rest is history. Since FRM has arrived on the scene, my results/confusion have been very mixed and frustrating, glimpses of brilliance mixed with total nothingness and confusion; for example I relied on USLM to get me through some moments which could have been really bad, I needed luck to be on my side and it was for literally the most important moment of my life, but then in the rest of life i was sluggish, slow and unmotivated so i put it down as my work was suffering.
I was going to wait for USLM to be upgraded since I'm a little Covid-broke (and i believe that was supposed to be a free upgrade? from the previous USLM?) but I really wanted to give this a try. Both I and my wife are in a bit of a rut and it's weighing on our wellbeing and happiness, it could always be so much worse, and to be honest we're very fortunate and happy in many ways, we're just both feeling a little stuck and stagnant. Shannon seemed to imply that playing it overnight for myself could have externality benefits for my wife and i figured hey, if both of us can benefit then even better we go through a life improvement together.
I'm excited to get started on another 6 month IML journey.
I just ordered stage 1 and will wait for his holiness, the great Benjamin to do his thang.
space
RE: space (Darwin) LTU - getting it together (again!) - fab10 - 08-13-2020
Welcome to the party my friend. I started two days ago, i dare say it is an amazing sub already.
Are you going to expose your wife directly to the sub?
RE: space (Darwin) LTU - getting it together (again!) - Darwin - 08-13-2020
Thanks bud, I'm going to be playing it for myself overnight an yes she is going to be exposed !
RE: space (Darwin) LTU - getting it together (again!) - Darwin - 08-13-2020
Oops I just saw the new no new names rule - Ben do I need to change back?
RE: space (Darwin) LTU - getting it together (again!) - Darwin - 08-13-2020
also @Benjamin do lemme know when you can hook up the purchase. Thank you brother.
RE: space (Darwin) LTU - getting it together (again!) - Darwin - 08-13-2020
Before I started playing TID kicked in last night with feeling happy, relaxed and at peace. After a night full of really bizarre dreams, woke up feeling safe.
Safe! I didn't realise I felt so constantly in danger / attacked. I also feel really tired. I'm going to sleep some more because right now i'm forgetting stuff and stumbling. I was afraid of the tiredness of a new sub due to the work pressure i'm under but i'm not phased right now, I really feel like it's ok..
RE: space (Darwin) LTU - getting it together (again!) - Darwin - 08-15-2020
(08-13-2020, 10:29 PM)space Wrote: Before I started playing TID kicked in last night with feeling happy, relaxed and at peace. After a night full of really bizarre dreams, woke up feeling safe.
Safe! I didn't realise I felt so constantly in danger / attacked. I also feel really tired. I'm going to sleep some more because right now i'm forgetting stuff and stumbling. I was afraid of the tiredness of a new sub due to the work pressure i'm under but i'm not phased right now, I really feel like it's ok..
First thing I notice is I'm having great conversations with people, I had genuine heart felt conversations with four taxi drivers, two of whom turned out to be neighbours - this comes after months of being somewhat withdrawn and feeling conscious about communication. I also feel immensely relaxed amid a huge work storm which is going on. And I feel safe - I'll reiterate that point because it's really quite something. It's almost upsetting to think how normally I'm so afraid of being criticised or attacked or back bitten but I've been able to put that down this last day or so and it's a real weight off my chest.
RE: space's LTU 6 journal - Darwin - 08-15-2020
Wife being very chill and happy - she hasn't been exposed yet. a number of friends have started talking to me after mostly radio silence.
RE: space (Darwin) LTU - getting it together (again!) - Benjamin - 08-15-2020
(08-13-2020, 09:55 AM)space Wrote: Oops I just saw the new no new names rule - Ben do I need to change back?
I can figure out what happened to your original account, as I had said in another thread pm me with what error you're getting. I've been completing the orders daily.
RE: space's LTU 6 journal - Darwin - 08-16-2020
Sorry @Benjamin I missed that message - I got the download fine thanks.
So after my second exposure, feeling relaxed and peaceful. Managing to crack through a lot of work - mostly because i'm seeing it more for what it is, which is fairly straight forward when it's not bound up in fears of things all going to shit, and a general sense of positivity and a 'let's see what I can do' attitude.
RE: space's LTU 6 journal - Benjamin - 08-16-2020
I meant more about the forum names, we prefer to keep the original name cos it's confusing and due to issues we've had in the past. So I meant I can figure out what happened to your forum account, or rename this one back to Darwin.
RE: space's LTU 6 journal - Darwin - 08-17-2020
Third day of exposure and i'm in a warm bubble of chill and wellbeing. I would normally be stressing myself out trying to meet deadlines by burning myself out but i'm refusing at the moment and prioritising sleep and and being with my family - the deadlines are still being met!
Yesterday my partner was triggered into a weepy state, she stayed like that most of the day but by the end of the day once it was out of her system was incredibly happy. Today we're both in a really good place - I normally make myself breakfast while she feeds our kid and she tells me not to make her anything, today for the first time ever she actually said she would eat. Ok i know this sounds lame, but the girl really doesn't accept support easily, today she seems way more at ease and in the flow - i don't know if that's because exposure to LTU though or because of changes in my behaviour - i'm much less stressed and have an attitude of i can handle things, whatever they may be.
RE: space's LTU 6 journal - Darwin - 08-18-2020
Day four and I'm having a blast. Haven't been this happy in a long time. Partner continues to be dealing with emotional issues, though what's new is that she's communicating those issues well and we're having productive conversations rather than arguing. I'm also communicating my emotional responses to her in a healthy way - this is good stuff.
Meanwhile on the work front, i continue to be very chill. I've got a lot to do, but am very clear that i'm not going to injure my sanity with overwork as I have done many times before - again rhough, this doesn't mean i'm getting less done, in fact i'm clearer headed and slightly more productive.
I also feel like anything is possible. I've been avoiding applying for really high profile jobs, and going for business ideas thinking they're out of my league but because my mind is a bit more relaxed and i'm more willing to see things as they asre, i can break them down better and don't overdramatise what's involved in these jobs.
RE: space's LTU 6 journal - Darwin - 08-18-2020
I gotta say my attitude change brilliant. I cant be made to do anything against my own will , I dont feel subject to anyone elses will.