(02-25-2017, 03:44 PM)Rayhon Wrote: [ -> ]Shannon I'm curious as to why you think / analyzed that I'm trying too hard. What specifically do you mean? I mean other then writing these posts I never think about them when I'm at home. I write these posts so you guys can get a story type journal of my experiences with these waitresses and what's to come in the future.
I'd like to know what you mean because you're usually right about these things.
Did not see this until I saw you asking me to answer it.
What I am referring about by trying too hard is basically focusing too much on trying to gain the approval of the attractive females you are interacting with at work. In my opinion, you are trying too hard and worried about it too much.
I can't know specifically what's going on beyond what you tell me, but I do like to try to help if I see something I think might be helpful. So if my point of view is valid and useful, take it into consideration.
(02-25-2017, 06:10 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ] (02-25-2017, 03:44 PM)Rayhon Wrote: [ -> ]Shannon I'm curious as to why you think / analyzed that I'm trying too hard. What specifically do you mean? I mean other then writing these posts I never think about them when I'm at home. I write these posts so you guys can get a story type journal of my experiences with these waitresses and what's to come in the future.
I'd like to know what you mean because you're usually right about these things.
Did not see this until I saw you asking me to answer it.
What I am referring about by trying too hard is basically focusing too much on trying to gain the approval of the attractive females you are interacting with at work. In my opinion, you are trying too hard and worried about it too much.
I can't know specifically what's going on beyond what you tell me, but I do like to try to help if I see something I think might be helpful. So if my point of view is valid and useful, take it into consideration.
Thank you for the response! I figured you didn't read it because you posted your reply to the thread one minute after I posted the question so you must have just missed it.
I appreciate the advice, I think your right. However I don't think in person I show off any signals of needyness or show the woman I interact with that I am desperate or really wanting to hook up with them.
I focus on my job completely when I'm at work, and basically ignore them otherwise. However I do agree that I need to just chill out and stop being outcome dependent.
I haven't been around allot of women my age (almost none) in the last 2 years because of my probation so I do have a bit of neediness that has piled up. I've interacted with allot of older women at the dog park and the last date I went on was last year with a women 8 years older then me. she was 29 at the time.
I need to just relax and focus on my job and if it's meant to be it's meant to be. I think DMSI will work it's magic.
If you have any advice on the best way to approach this situation I'd appreciate it. Since I see them 3-4 nights a week I figure i'll take it really slow and just let them become attracted to me by seeing my personality naturally instead of me forcing anything or being blunt about it.
However if they give me any signal at all that they want me to hang out with them I will obviously ask them out.
Day 5,
Today I felt way better overall. Yesterday my head was a mess because I did too much TRT and killed my estrogen levels way beyond what I should have so I was a zombie basically.
Today I was genuinely happy and enjoying myself at work.
Nothing particularly interesting but I met another waitress at the very end of my shift and we shook hands with strong eye contact and she said she liked my name.
She's very attractive and definitely my type.
I'm interested to see what happens next since there are so many women there and I'm extremely attracted to two of them and very attracted to allot more.
I couldn't be in a better setting for DMSI to work it's magic so let's pray that it affects me as strongly as it did in the past.
But that being said I'm going to stop posting journal reports unless something very significant happens. I don't want to focus on these woman because I'l be creating more neediness subconsciously.
I think the best way to attract women without being needy is to either engage them with humor, have fun with them (genuinely having fun, nothing else) or engage them in stimulating intellectual conversation, depending on her personality type.
Just have fun with life, basically. Laugh because you love to amuse yourself, but don't laugh at other people's expense - instead be "that guy" around whom everyone is always laughing and having fun without ever trying because he is simply enjoying his life to the fullest. Have the courage to make yourself genuinely happy, and genuinely having a good time, all the time.
Day 6
Feeling pretty depressed and shitty about life right now. Not sure if i'm facing resistance but I'm not feeling very good. If I had the money I would take off travelling right now. That's all I want to do right now.
Just curious if DMSI had an influence on your creativity at all. Also how the music is going in general? Are you still working on stuff?
(02-27-2017, 01:37 PM)mat422 Wrote: [ -> ]Just curious if DMSI had an influence on your creativity at all. Also how the music is going in general? Are you still working on stuff?
well so far the days after natural song and lyric writing and now have actually been better then while on the program. I feel like the effects hit me more after using the program.
I spit the best freestyle i've ever done today earlier with a friend we randomly started freestyling for like two minutes and it was unbelievably amazing.
I am still working on my music. I notice I get motivation while on DMSI too. I was on DMSI initially when I decided to follow this passion of mine.
Today I felt better then yesterday.
Day 11 3.0.1A
So far haven't encountered so I don't know exactly what's happening but I feel good now not depressed. (not super happy though either) Just content I suppose.
Music wise I just wrote the best track I've ever written so my creativity and flow from natural song and lyric is still affecting me. DMSI has not seemed to interfere with the effects at all.
UNLIKE overcome Fear 5g which did feel like I had major writers block.
Perhaps it was unrelated, diet based (lack of nutrients, i'm vegan so MAYBE I didn't have enough of a certain vitamin/mineral at the time.)
I know DMSI have Overcome fear in it so I don't know why this time it hasn't given me writers block but I feel good that is hasn't negatively affected me music wise.
(03-03-2017, 02:05 AM)Rayhon Wrote: [ -> ]Day 11 3.0.1A
So far haven't encountered so I don't know exactly what's happening but I feel good now not depressed. (not super happy though either) Just content I suppose.
Music wise I just wrote the best track I've ever written so my creativity and flow from natural song and lyric is still affecting me. DMSI has not seemed to interfere with the effects at all.
UNLIKE overcome Fear 5g which did feel like I had major writers block.
Perhaps it was unrelated, diet based (lack of nutrients, i'm vegan so MAYBE I didn't have enough of a certain vitamin/mineral at the time.)
I know DMSI have Overcome fear in it so I don't know why this time it hasn't given me writers block but I feel good that is hasn't negatively affected me music wise.
Are you switching over to V3.1-A today?
(03-03-2017, 09:39 AM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]Are you switching over to V3.1-A today?
http://subliminal-talk.com/thread-8313-p...#pid159131
(03-03-2017, 02:34 AM)Rayhon Wrote: [ -> ]Thanks for the response, I don't mind feeling strange by switching subs , but I rather feel that potential strangeness / confliction while i'm not working, so I will wait until Sunday night to start 3.1a. Thank you 
@
4Kingdoms, thanks for answering the question for me. Saves me the time and I couldn't do it better myself, I appreciate the little things like that that this forum has that other forums may or may not. (im new to forums other then this one)
(03-04-2017, 03:29 AM)Rayhon Wrote: [ -> ]@4Kingdoms, thanks for answering the question for me. Saves me the time and I couldn't do it better myself, I appreciate the little things like that that this forum has that may or may not. (im new to forums other then this one)
You're welcome. I try to help everyone, when I can.
Day 12
What an interesting day, to say the least. No I didn't bang any woman but I definitely feel DMSI working again. It's fucking unbelievable how fast 5.5g technology kicks in. I am so stoked. It made such a drastic difference for me in how I feel and interact with these woman.
It's easy for me to guage it because it's the same woman (Met many new ones today though)
and its the same environment, and i'm very in tune with how I'm feeling. I know when i'm feeling low self esteem vs high self esteem. Or stressed ect. And I can sometimes when feeling stressed, use my breathing to help reduce the stressed (while working). Sometimes stress would randomly build up today.
Anyways, all the woman there were nicer to me today than in the past, were smiling at me constantly (every woman smiled at me today) last week NONE, some did but it wasn't a real genuine smile. I can read faces easier then words (empath) so I know for sure when a woman is into me or not.
I'm not saying ALL these woman wanted to bang me or date me. But I can tell for sure some of them are interested for sure.
One woman who works as a cook in the back walked by and we bumped into each other in the hallway and she put BOTH hands on my arms and rubbed me with both hands on my arms while saying sorry.
This is a clear indictator of interest, she used clear physical (rubbing of her hands on my arm) to show me she's interested. Made me feel really good after. She's short and cute but she wears masculine clothing due to work. Unlike the other 30 servers (yup im serious I was way off with the amount of woman that work there, way more then I expected, I saw like 8 more today)
I also had one of the sexiest blondes there 21 years old tall and very nice, last week she was kinda bitchy/stuck up (very subtle, not in a bold way), But that's when I felt like shit because I had high test and no estrogen due to me fucking up my hormone therapy.
Made me feel like a fucking wierd last week and my voice too so I could see why she was negative last week.
Anyways today she was chatting me up while walking by and not just her but all the woman that last week showed me basically 0 intention, started talking to me and asking me what my name is and smiling at me when I walked by.
my body language and more importantly how I FELT was amazing today compared to last week. Much less stress, felt solid (proper hormone balance, and could feel DMSI making me more comfortable and less anxiety)
I listened to 3 loops during the day when I woke up today and yesterday so this is also first time I'm using during day in long time. (first for DMSI)
that blonde 21 year old woman I was just talking about asked me if I want anything and I told her to get me a coffee and she did. We talked for a bit after that.
I'm really looking forward to work now that I feel much more comfortable around these woman and because even more of them have showed up that are absolutely mint 10/10s.
So yeah DMSI is starting to take effect and it should be nice to see what happens from here on in.
I'm going back on proper test tomorrow instead of fluctuating hormone levels that I have with DBOL. (due to lack of funds, dog getting sick and paying massive vet bills so I couldn't afford it)
The normal test makes me feel the same for many days in a row instead of the constant hormone fluctuation I have had for a while now. To be honest it is extremely fucked up to go from high test to low test in one day.
Never do steroids, stupid decision, although I did gain massive mass (40 lbs) and kept 25 lbs still. I shut down my own production so until I take 6 months to a year off work and let myself go without any testosterone for that long (it's hell, I've done it for a month before I couldn't handle it, gets worse and worse)
I did it because I expected to go to jail again and I was scared. I already did go for 4 days and at the time I was 125 lbs and now I'm 155, my max weight was 175 when I hit the gym hard and was doing bodybuilding type doses of roids instead of just TRT like I am.
Btw little tidbit of drama that occured today, a police officer comes to my work while i'm working at 10pm and does a fucking curfew check on me in front of my work inside near the hostess area.
Luckily the hostess, some guy whos Persian like myself had my back and lied for me without me even asking him and told everyone who asked that it was because of my car insurance expiring.
No one came up to me and asked about it so I didn't have to lie or tell the truth (depending on who it is) I prefer to be honest, it's extremely hard for me to lie to people nowadays. My boss actually told me he hired me because of my honesty & genuinity.
It was a mix up with the police officer because under his system it says I cant be allowed past 10pm for work purposes, although with my bail supervisors system it says I can. So the officer said he could technically arrest me right now, but he knew I wasn't lying and obviously used his proper judgment.
I was choked to see the cop there I told the guy it was inappropriate for him to come to my work and it jeopardizes my job. Cop said he would lie for me if it came down to it. Nice guy! I was choked but still respectful and nice. I always respect authority if they respect me.
But yeah kind of lengthy post so il end it with one last statement.
I felt genuinely happy today in random moments and it felt amazing. Last week I was completely out of state, and today I wasn't always completely in "state" but I was never completely out of it today.
and by state I mean "Being in the moment, not in my head, happy"
Make sure you use the proper number of loops: 2 per day, not 3.