05-07-2015, 10:07 AM
whats up guys, another quick update stage 3 day 30
im noticing i wanna start arguments more, im getting heated at times. Im sure im just bringing that part of myself that I kept it for too long and ill dial it down soon
i gotta start meditating regularly again and get better emotional control. Ive of course learned its ok to feel emotions, only anger, but theyre not things you should keep in your heart. let go of the anger as quickly as it comes
im black and im dealing with my anger towards cops lately. this unlawful killing of my people is getting ridiculous. not just black people, but the way they attack all races is ridiculous
im moving out the country asap, working on getting my forex trading down and going from there
im averaging about 11-12 hours a day on the subs, gonna hit about 380 hrs this stage, working on getting it closer to 450. im loving the stream cause i can play it louder without noticing it
im also a bit more impatient lately. even when waiting on things at the store. the way it breaks down is whatever i gotta do (order, decide, move something, etc) i dont think about it, so im essentially done with it as i think to do it, then im waiting on the other party. Again im gonna meditate to work on that, but on the bright side im developing the sense to not have my time wasted
i feel heavier, not weight, but presence. When I speak i feel my words more, i feel emotions more, when i move i own the space im moving to more, when I dance i care less than ever. Tyler from RSD talked about that in terms of getting more solid, like once you get good with women theres only so much more to learn. He spoke about game becoming like wood or steel, I guess its really owning everything more
Naturals always say congruence is the most important thing. I agree cause women have a 6th sense for fakery. And as someone who grew up bad with women and I now have some game, i realize the hardness metaphor. Its essentially being more congruent wiwht the behaviors and the subcommunications of a high value sex worthy man
similarly am6 is helping me (probably through naturalizer) become more congruent with myself and to doubt myself less
gotta go get some shit done, later guys
im noticing i wanna start arguments more, im getting heated at times. Im sure im just bringing that part of myself that I kept it for too long and ill dial it down soon
i gotta start meditating regularly again and get better emotional control. Ive of course learned its ok to feel emotions, only anger, but theyre not things you should keep in your heart. let go of the anger as quickly as it comes
im black and im dealing with my anger towards cops lately. this unlawful killing of my people is getting ridiculous. not just black people, but the way they attack all races is ridiculous
im moving out the country asap, working on getting my forex trading down and going from there
im averaging about 11-12 hours a day on the subs, gonna hit about 380 hrs this stage, working on getting it closer to 450. im loving the stream cause i can play it louder without noticing it
im also a bit more impatient lately. even when waiting on things at the store. the way it breaks down is whatever i gotta do (order, decide, move something, etc) i dont think about it, so im essentially done with it as i think to do it, then im waiting on the other party. Again im gonna meditate to work on that, but on the bright side im developing the sense to not have my time wasted
i feel heavier, not weight, but presence. When I speak i feel my words more, i feel emotions more, when i move i own the space im moving to more, when I dance i care less than ever. Tyler from RSD talked about that in terms of getting more solid, like once you get good with women theres only so much more to learn. He spoke about game becoming like wood or steel, I guess its really owning everything more
Naturals always say congruence is the most important thing. I agree cause women have a 6th sense for fakery. And as someone who grew up bad with women and I now have some game, i realize the hardness metaphor. Its essentially being more congruent wiwht the behaviors and the subcommunications of a high value sex worthy man
similarly am6 is helping me (probably through naturalizer) become more congruent with myself and to doubt myself less
gotta go get some shit done, later guys
