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SargeMaximus
Yeah, I'm feeling ya. It's interesting that women (or just people in general) will think it's strange or obsessive that a guy is very disciplined to hit the gym, work on their business, and work on themselves in their sex/social/personal life (by leaving their comfort zone). That's until the guy is jacked, has tons of disposable income, and is a kickass personable dude, THEN the women flock and think that it's fine.
Here's a soundbite: "No one cares about the sapling until it's an great oak."
That said, if you're not giving the types of value she wants, she doesn't really need to contribute. Let's say some shitty salesman approached you at the department store, and wasn't even able to make through their memorized script, would you feel obligated to help them? What if their script was all about how it would help him, but nothing was said about you? You'd probably not care, even if the product was fantastic.
Remember, women have options, and they know it to some level. If she can't see that, she won't care, she doesn't have to care, and going that way is actually a sound strategy; how could her mental health be affected if she cared about the mental health of every single guy that's interested in her?
I think she'll give you something to work with if she wants you to 'win' (i.e, "get" her).
That said, when I'm genuinely attracted to a woman and talk to her, the convo runs smooth, even if she ultimately goes nowhere. When she's hot, but I'm not feeling it, I draw a blank, so does she, and the conversation is straight up shitty.
(01-17-2015, 04:54 PM)DanAmerson Wrote: [ -> ]That said, if you're not giving the types of value she wants, she doesn't really need to contribute. Let's say some shitty salesman approached you at the department store, and wasn't even able to make through their memorized script, would you feel obligated to help them? What if their script was all about how it would help him, but nothing was said about you? You'd probably not care, even if the product was fantastic.
Yeah but see that's what I don't get. I thought women just want a strong confident man? Well I AM that, so what else do I need to sell her? In my opinion, just approaching her is enough, cause no one else does that, what value should I bring if I'M high value? It makes no sense. Why can't it just be about sex?
(01-17-2015, 04:54 PM)DanAmerson Wrote: [ -> ]Remember, women have options, and they know it to some level. If she can't see that, she won't care, she doesn't have to care, and going that way is actually a sound strategy; how could her mental health be affected if she cared about the mental health of every single guy that's interested in her?
I think she'll give you something to work with if she wants you to 'win' (i.e, "get" her).
That said, when I'm genuinely attracted to a woman and talk to her, the convo runs smooth, even if she ultimately goes nowhere. When she's hot, but I'm not feeling it, I draw a blank, so does she, and the conversation is straight up shitty.
Totally women have options. They can choose from 500,000 beta males, or a handful of alphas like me. Where's the issue?
I'm not saying I'm approaching women as much as I could, I just think even if I WAS, they'd STILL be turned off me despite that confidence. It just seems to be the way.
Just now I was talking to a girl on POF. She stopped replying after I replied to her second message. like wtf is going on anyhow?
I feel like I can't do anything about it because I don't know what 'it' is.
Not trying to dump this on you, just saying it like it is.
(01-17-2015, 05:19 PM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ]Totally women have options. They can choose from 500,000 beta males, or a handful of alphas like me. Where's the issue?
I'm not saying I'm approaching women as much as I could, I just think even if I WAS, they'd STILL be turned off me despite that confidence. It just seems to be the way.
Just now I was talking to a girl on POF. She stopped replying after I replied to her second message. like wtf is going on anyhow?
I feel like I can't do anything about it because I don't know what 'it' is.
Not trying to dump this on you, just saying it like it is.
Online, she only has your words, not your presence, so it may be hard to interpret. Even the lowliest of men can write some cocky-funny text and hit 'Send'. Maybe she got bored and went to go get a sandwich.
I don't know this for a fact, but in person, my bet is that women are reading you, and finding something about you that you're not even aware of (incongruence), and that turns them away. I have this too. Neither you nor I know our next level of confidence, but perhaps that involves us finding and clearing away in-congruency by owning up to it.
Yeah, it's not a glamorous answer, but it's a path that takes 100% responsibility.
Also, I used to think I was an 'Alpha' last year, the year before that, at the start of university, and even back in high school. Most of that time, I was the most beta beta-male there could be, trying to push buttons, and spit game. But I THOUGHT I WAS ALPHA. But with subliminals, I'm steadily improving. So I can't completely call myself an 'Alpha Male' even after running 2 major subliminals, since I don't even know what the next level is from my current standing. My suggestion is that you might not be the 100% alpha male quite yet.
Stage 1, Day 14,
I was able to get a few hours before work to do some studying.
Work was a very pleasant experience, I felt I was giving a lot of warmth, and the time went by very fast. I'm feeling more 'alpha', and I'm starting to get pretty big. In 'Danger&Play's "From Fit to Big", it was mentioned that people will grab you more; a top sales guy squeezed my bicep when greeting me, which never happened. Someone else mentioned my 'guns'.
I've had a new desire pop into my life, which seems insignificant if coming from the wrong place. But I can guarantee that it's coming from the right place, because I feel really good about it. Plus, I don't want to shoo it away due to bad societal programming. Here goes.
New life goal: Have sex with porn star(s) before death.
Disclaimer: I don't watch porn, and I don't know much about the actresses and their names, but I recently became aware of Mia Khalifa and her death threats. I've seen some pictures of her, and she's very well built. Then, I see some Vines of her talking, one of her giggling due to a success, and I must say that I've developed a little crush. Which got me thinking.
I don't need to develop a whole lot to go from where I am to being 'successful with women'. I could push for 2-3 months and be dating any 3-4 girls at a time. But, if I want to be sleeping with pron stars, then the amount of developing as a man I'd like to do would be much more to ACTUALLY MAKE IT HAPPEN. Note that this isn't a sort of fantasy; I want to have actual physical sex with one or many of these women.
A typical girl would be opening her legs for a guy that tickles her 'fancy' and doing other things in her life (school, work, hobbies). A porn star is paid to spread her legs for a living, so what does it take to get her to spread her legs electively? What type of man does that for her? What if I were to become that man? What does it take to become that man?
Of course, the instant that this train of thought occurred, my level of desire for the life of my dreams shot sky high, which fueled my good feelings and time flying by (mentioned earlier).
I do know that many porn stars do not make good life partners due to several reasons, but this relates to who I am as a person and how I can improve it.
This also ISN'T a way to close myself away from other women, as I raise my standards for porn stars only.. that would be the worst sort of rationalization one could think of.
I'm channeling these desires into improving myself in order to achieve my life goals, which in fact puts me in closer contact with these types of women (living in big American cities). I also want to move to Los Angeles, generally speaking.
Thoughts?
(01-17-2015, 10:55 PM)DanAmerson Wrote: [ -> ]Stage 1, Day 14,
I was able to get a few hours before work to do some studying.
Work was a very pleasant experience, I felt I was giving a lot of warmth, and the time went by very fast. I'm feeling more 'alpha', and I'm starting to get pretty big. In 'Danger&Play's "From Fit to Big", it was mentioned that people will grab you more; a top sales guy squeezed my bicep when greeting me, which never happened. Someone else mentioned my 'guns'.
I've had a new desire pop into my life, which seems insignificant if coming from the wrong place. But I can guarantee that it's coming from the right place, because I feel really good about it. Plus, I don't want to shoo it away due to bad societal programming. Here goes.
New life goal: Have sex with porn star(s) before death.
Disclaimer: I don't watch porn, and I don't know much about the actresses and their names, but I recently became aware of Mia Khalifa and her death threats. I've seen some pictures of her, and she's very well built. Then, I see some Vines of her talking, one of her giggling due to a success, and I must say that I've developed a little crush. Which got me thinking.
I don't need to develop a whole lot to go from where I am to being 'successful with women'. I could push for 2-3 months and be dating any 3-4 girls at a time. But, if I want to be sleeping with pron stars, then the amount of developing as a man I'd like to do would be much more to ACTUALLY MAKE IT HAPPEN. Note that this isn't a sort of fantasy; I want to have actual physical sex with one or many of these women.
A typical girl would be opening her legs for a guy that tickles her 'fancy' and doing other things in her life (school, work, hobbies). A porn star is paid to spread her legs for a living, so what does it take to get her to spread her legs electively? What type of man does that for her? What if I were to become that man? What does it take to become that man?
Of course, the instant that this train of thought occurred, my level of desire for the life of my dreams shot sky high, which fueled my good feelings and time flying by (mentioned earlier).
I do know that many porn stars do not make good life partners due to several reasons, but this relates to who I am as a person and how I can improve it.
This also ISN'T a way to close myself away from other women, as I raise my standards for porn stars only.. that would be the worst sort of rationalization one could think of.
I'm channeling these desires into improving myself in order to achieve my life goals, which in fact puts me in closer contact with these types of women (living in big American cities). I also want to move to Los Angeles, generally speaking.
Thoughts?
If you decided that is what you want then nothing should stop you from achieving it.
By nothing I mean the following : friends, governments, religions, parents , girlfriends, societal programming, shaming, guilting, and I mean nothing.
Good luck with it man.
You thinking of becoming a pornstar yourself?
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FREAK4LIFE
Thanks for the support;
I'm not entirely sure I'd want to appear in a porno; it'd kind of defeat the purpose mentioned earlier (what would make these women want to have with you electively?). If women are paid to have sex with me, then it changes the context a little bit. Of course, I'd still be having sex with them, so I get your point.
That said, if I were to become successful at it and made a real living off of it, I'd tell my parents at some point, but we'd have to keep it from my grandfather, who is, well, my grandfather (full of societal programming).
(01-18-2015, 08:32 AM)DanAmerson Wrote: [ -> ]@FREAK4LIFE
Thanks for the support;
I'm not entirely sure I'd want to appear in a porno; it'd kind of defeat the purpose mentioned earlier (what would make these women want to have with you electively?). If women are paid to have sex with me, then it changes the context a little bit. Of course, I'd still be having sex with them, so I get your point.
That said, if I were to become successful at it and made a real living off of it, I'd tell my parents at some point, but we'd have to keep it from my grandfather, who is, well, my grandfather (full of societal programming).
James Deen is in a relationship with porn actress Stoya. Don't you think someone in the industry might have the same passions? They're in it for a reason, not just money I'd imagine.
Birds of a feather, and all that.
Stage 1, Day 15,
I'm getting back on top of my studies; I will do really well if I keep it up.
Work was fun and went by quickly despite the fact that it had almost no one at the store. I brought the meal I cooked yesterday (I recently started cooking), and someone that went to cooking school was thoroughly impressed with it. A bunch of other people loved it. It really reinforced my confidence as a future cook.
After work, I had my FB over, and we had some really good sex. In fact, I invented this move for cunnilingus, and had her be my guinea chick. She loved it. If the 'Tongue Throne' ever becomes a popular position, I'm the one who invented it! You have to be strong, and the woman has to be light.
I had to pull away from her and study for my class. I'm not quite a bit tired, so bed for me, and back to the gym first thing tomorrow! She's getting attached (and told me firsthand), and I leave town in 3 months.
(01-18-2015, 09:01 AM)SargeMaximus Wrote: [ -> ]James Deen is in a relationship with porn actress Stoya. Don't you think someone in the industry might have the same passions? They're in it for a reason, not just money I'd imagine.
Birds of a feather, and all that.
It might be right for me - who knows -, but others in my life might not think the same thing. That's what I mean. This sort of living is outside of 'the Prison' (BlackDragon's book), so it'll attract everyone's opinion on the matter.
Plus, I know nothing about the industry, how to get in, what people are like, what effect it leaves on people. I have heard stories involving porn and abuse (like Linda Lovelace), but stories like that can happen in other industries too (ex: Tina and Ike Turner).
Don't worry, I've got no real plans on becoming a porn star; I simply want to be balls deep in a couple of them.
(01-18-2015, 07:47 PM)DanAmerson Wrote: [ -> ]It might be right for me - who knows -, but others in my life might not think the same thing. That's what I mean. This sort of living is outside of 'the Prison' (BlackDragon's book), so it'll attract everyone's opinion on the matter.
Plus, I know nothing about the industry, how to get in, what people are like, what effect it leaves on people. I have heard stories involving porn and abuse (like Linda Lovelace), but stories like that can happen in other industries too (ex: Tina and Ike Turner).
Don't worry, I've got no real plans on becoming a porn star; I simply want to be balls deep in a couple of them.
Caring what others think still? I don't understand. As for the other objections, you learn how, just like with anything. I imagine you don't know how exactly to get into the music industry either (or didn't at any rate) but you're still going for it.
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SargeMaximus; Probably do care to an extent, but it's not a priority. In fact, REALLY low if it were on a list of things I want. The music stuff is VERY high up, so I'm going for that, despite the above objections
Stage 1, Day 16,
Halfway through Stage 1, and I must say I've come a long ways, probably 2/3rd refreshed from my first run of AM5.
A good Monday for my habits. I just happen to be studying all the time for my big midterm, so guitar, singing and songwriting has been latent for nearly a week. Gonna have to bring it back very soon.
I did pMemory, and it's going awesome. It's not relate-able with my classwork quite yet.
Did another nutritional interview; thought I'd be nervous, but I instantly relaxed with my mock 'client'; I had someone observe me, and they both raved about how confident and resourceful I was in the moment.. I had forgotten the reason I was sitting with them until halfway through the meeting. I was just letting things flow; something I loved about AM the first time was that it made me shine under different forms of pressure.
I called up the people who are taking me in for my placement (friends of family with whom I'm relatively close with). They're really cool; they mentioned that with my playing and busking, I could be playing at a certain bar that they fraternize with, giving an extra 200$ for 4 hours. Gonna use pMemory to learn bunch of songs at some point this quarter.
Stage 1, Day 17,
Jumping in bed in a few minutes, before then, I'll post something.
Gym went well, pMemory went pretty well, still have some residual stuff that I'll resolve very soon.
Prepped in advance for my mock interview, and was able to do rather well; I still need to make technical terms into layman's terms.
I visit with my intern professors; they've been very kind recently, in light of the fact that I submitted a form to my new internship manager in some pretty broken French. That is to say that I've written quite a few Anglicisms (writing the language through the mind of an English speaker). This new manager is VERY keen and proud of her French heritage (so I hear), and knowing that, these professors were enjoying a laugh from the irony.
They suggested that I get a French correction software (which I hear is very good), and to listen to French radio. Can do.
For some reason, I'm feeling a weird feeling that this lady won't/doesn't like me because of that unprofessional mistake; it's not at all logical. I feel like such a woman in this case; I've never met her. I'm letting the emotion flow and it's mostly gone.
So much of 'Man Transformation' is making sense to me; it's my 3rd/4th time listening to this. Eben says that the best way around those invisible blocks is through frustration. Hmm.. how interesting, as I've recently come up against some frustration. It's also stated that maturity means dropping 'games' that we play that give up short term benefits. Example, if you find out your blocks, you can't resort to feigning ignorance anymore, because you now know it. I can certainly see some glimpse of resistance to removing those crutches, such as not being 100% native in French. But I'm going to crush that.