Subliminal Talk

Full Version: "What is an Alpha male?"
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" When one is "becoming alpha" for themselves, the results must be genuine. If the goal is to sleep with women, how can the result be genuine? You're basically doing what she wants, and by doing that, you're not truly being your own man. Or am I missing something?"-Shannon

how is doing what she wants related to the goal of sleeping with woman? The strategy for sleeping with woman isn't try to please them until they take their pants off..unless she wants to sleep with you and your doing what she wants by sleeping with her, but the goal was to sleep with her-so your really doing what you BOTH want-lol
I'm totally messing with the somantics

I think your basically saying one needs to choose to be grow for themselves not for some trinket sign-post of success or immediate gratification. To do so would be an inherent paradox to what one was growing towards. And I couldn't agree more.

I'll play devil's advocate though since I have spent a bit of time with some of these guys and what the are capable of doing with zero manipulation or pre-planned anything is mind baffling and they themselves are extremist but quite "alpha" in the internal sense, not the macho sense.

-(many of the teachers at RSD are quite intelligent men who go out 5-7 nights a week not drinking-for 5-12 years in a row) -in that real world night life situations and experience-which RSD is primarily focused on--woman-especially extremely attractive woman-can read men and their behaviors-down to the subtlest of cues-one of those cues is trying to do anything 'for the woman' as opposed to primarily yourself. Basically to be consistently good you can't fake it. This gives birth to the great "pua" debate/confusion of how to have intention while still having all one's actions be for oneself and for one's own amusement...eventually their is a shift where going out becomes refreshing, recharging, liberating, even 'spiritual' in the sense that the focus is so on one's own presence and the present, and one's mind and body are charged, in flow, and responding perfectly to the enivroment while always being the source of positivty and least reactivity, this shift in understanding is what creates the alpha behavior, eventually this state is reinforced through going out despite whatever results-and that aspect of indifference creates a new stage of development..it further reinforces alpha, then when one has success with ridiculously attractive woman, it creates a feedback loop, or reference experience, that that just is the kind of guy one is, and that makes one even more relaxed and alpha lol etc. You don't need to be getting laid to be Alpha, but having CHOICE with woman is definitely an alpha trait.
Basically the traits developed are
1. confidence regardless of situation
2. Humour
3. Self expression
4. Relaxed
5. Non-reactive
6. Confidence
7. Taking action despite resistance
8. Dealing with confontation
9. Learning to take woman lightly and immutably
10. Drawing sense of good feelings from within
11. Knowing you values
12. being congruent
13. Self expression
14. Social savvy
15. the list goes on
all very 'alpha' traits
Guys go in with the wrong motivation and either come out with the right motivation and results, or stay the same and think their cooler cause they learned some bs that can keep a chick entertained. The fact is to get consistent results one has to BE the kind of guy that gets consistent results. The change is ultimately internal even if the motivation initially was poor...but honestly the driving force of woman has initially led many a great man down the path of real self improvement so I'm not knocking it.
Going out that much is not for me anymore, I just don't care anymore, my life's to good without it, and since doing Alpha set and Sex Magnet I enjoy going out without trying anything. The subs did alot of the internal work for me, I just showed up, had fun, learned, and went for what I wanted and results came more and more.
(03-23-2013, 02:40 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]I am succeeding in a business that I was laughed at and ridiculed for. The people who ridiculed me, now envy me. They see me waking up when I want to, working when I want to, playing when I want to, eating what I want, where I want, with whom I want, spending money they don't have, or don't have to spend as they please. They realize now that I am capable of doing anything I choose to do. And I choose to succeed.

And God bless you for helping us develop that lifestyle as well !!!
(04-27-2013, 12:47 AM)RainbowAbyss Wrote: [ -> ]" When one is "becoming alpha" for themselves, the results must be genuine. If the goal is to sleep with women, how can the result be genuine? You're basically doing what she wants, and by doing that, you're not truly being your own man. Or am I missing something?"-Shannon

how is doing what she wants related to the goal of sleeping with woman? The strategy for sleeping with woman isn't try to please them until they take their pants off..unless she wants to sleep with you and your doing what she wants by sleeping with her, but the goal was to sleep with her-so your really doing what you BOTH want-lol
I'm totally messing with the somantics

I think your basically saying one needs to choose to be grow for themselves not for some trinket sign-post of success or immediate gratification. To do so would be an inherent paradox to what one was growing towards. And I couldn't agree more.

I'll play devil's advocate though since I have spent a bit of time with some of these guys and what the are capable of doing with zero manipulation or pre-planned anything is mind baffling and they themselves are extremist but quite "alpha" in the internal sense, not the macho sense.

-(many of the teachers at RSD are quite intelligent men who go out 5-7 nights a week not drinking-for 5-12 years in a row) -in that real world night life situations and experience-which RSD is primarily focused on--woman-especially extremely attractive woman-can read men and their behaviors-down to the subtlest of cues-one of those cues is trying to do anything 'for the woman' as opposed to primarily yourself. Basically to be consistently good you can't fake it. This gives birth to the great "pua" debate/confusion of how to have intention while still having all one's actions be for oneself and for one's own amusement...eventually their is a shift where going out becomes refreshing, recharging, liberating, even 'spiritual' in the sense that the focus is so on one's own presence and the present, and one's mind and body are charged, in flow, and responding perfectly to the enivroment while always being the source of positivty and least reactivity, this shift in understanding is what creates the alpha behavior, eventually this state is reinforced through going out despite whatever results-and that aspect of indifference creates a new stage of development..it further reinforces alpha, then when one has success with ridiculously attractive woman, it creates a feedback loop, or reference experience, that that just is the kind of guy one is, and that makes one even more relaxed and alpha lol etc. You don't need to be getting laid to be Alpha, but having CHOICE with woman is definitely an alpha trait.
Basically the traits developed are
1. confidence regardless of situation
2. Humour
3. Self expression
4. Relaxed
5. Non-reactive
6. Confidence
7. Taking action despite resistance
8. Dealing with confontation
9. Learning to take woman lightly and immutably
10. Drawing sense of good feelings from within
11. Knowing you values
12. being congruent
13. Self expression
14. Social savvy
15. the list goes on
all very 'alpha' traits
Guys go in with the wrong motivation and either come out with the right motivation and results, or stay the same and think their cooler cause they learned some bs that can keep a chick entertained. The fact is to get consistent results one has to BE the kind of guy that gets consistent results. The change is ultimately internal even if the motivation initially was poor...but honestly the driving force of woman has initially led many a great man down the path of real self improvement so I'm not knocking it.
Going out that much is not for me anymore, I just don't care anymore, my life's to good without it, and since doing Alpha set and Sex Magnet I enjoy going out without trying anything. The subs did alot of the internal work for me, I just showed up, had fun, learned, and went for what I wanted and results came more and more.

Yes, what I'm saying is that efforts at growth that are improperly motivated will often fail, and I am also pointing out that one must focus inwardly to make the changes necessary to become what women want, not chase after sex.

If I am going to college to please my nagging mother who won't get off my back about getting another degree -- as I once did -- then I am not going to college for reasons that will properly motivate me to succeed fully. But if I am going to college because I want to earn a degree that will unlock doors to a career that I know will make my life better, then I will be properly motivated. The difference is in the quality of results.

If I am trying to be alpha because I want to attract the ladies and get sex, then my motivation is external, and that does not result in the best results. Alpha, by definition, needs for nothing external to itself because it can take responsibility for providing for itself. That very lack of neediness is what women find attractive about an alpha male, and you cannot achieve it if your sole motivation for getting to alpha is to get sex, because you're being motivated by neediness.

Now, yes, you can outgrow that because of the program, and a lot of guys do. But you aren't outgrowing it because you're trying to become alpha, at that point, but because of how you went about becoming more alpha. The program just happens to have that effect.

This is the reason why the program motivates you to internalize and lose interest in women at first: they are a distraction from the real work to be done, which must be focused on yourself, not on vagina. Hopefully that makes sense in response to what you wrote. I'm not feeling like my brain is fully functional right now, as tired as I am still.
I'm wondering how long the disinterest in women is meant to last Shannon?

Because in Stage 1 I didn't care much about them but now in Stage 2 the interest is back in force, though now that I say that with less neediness and desperation, but much more desire to go out and approach.

-Ben
It lasts as long as it needs to for the individual. Generally, interest in women can return between stage 2 and 4.
Shannon,

Your definition of Alpha gave me a sense of elation. I had a moment of clarity where I thought, "I can interpret the sources of negativity past and present as calls to self-actualization. Like Aikido, I can redirect that energy.

P.S. The sword analogy is brilliant.

On a semi-related note:

I've completed John Alexander's book and David DeAngelo's book. I will continue to re-read them. What other books and/or materials that support your definition of alpha do you recommend to supplement AM6?
(12-12-2014, 10:19 PM)essy Wrote: [ -> ]I've completed John Alexander's book and David DeAngelo's book. I will continue to re-read them. What other books and/or materials that support your definition of alpha do you recommend to supplement AM6?

I would recommend "The Unchained Man - Alpa Male 2.0" by blackdragon. The book is about creating an alpha male lifestyle that brings total happiness in all areas, not just with relationships.

Read it, keep an open mind and you'll learn a lot!
(12-03-2014, 04:56 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]It lasts as long as it needs to for the individual. Generally, interest in women can return between stage 2 and 4.

Shannon, I'm wondering, with the ingraining of "Be entirely unconcerned about “getting the girl” or achieving sexual interaction, which will make the ladies perceive you as higher status, higher value, and more worthy of both.", will during that time, i will be so unconcerned about sex that i won't want it at all, and i won't make any effort to attract any girls at all? Or if I find an awesome girl that turns me on, and we seem to click, i can still attract her and have sex or get into a relationship if i felt like it? (or will i just completely absolutely not "feel like it" because of the subliminal programming in that italicized phrase?
(12-23-2014, 08:13 PM)dissonance Wrote: [ -> ]
(12-03-2014, 04:56 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]It lasts as long as it needs to for the individual. Generally, interest in women can return between stage 2 and 4.

Shannon, I'm wondering, with the ingraining of "Be entirely unconcerned about “getting the girl” or achieving sexual interaction, which will make the ladies perceive you as higher status, higher value, and more worthy of both.", will during that time, i will be so unconcerned about sex that i won't want it at all, and i won't make any effort to attract any girls at all? Or if I find an awesome girl that turns me on, and we seem to click, i can still attract her and have sex or get into a relationship if i felt like it? (or will i just completely absolutely not "feel like it" because of the subliminal programming in that italicized phrase?

I have eaten lunch. I am now unconcerned about eating anything else. Then someone offers me a free slice of my favorite kind of pie. Am I so unconcerned with eating that I will pass this offer up? That depends on how much I ate for lunch (how satisfied and unconcerned I am, and how much time I have). Sometimes the answer will be yes, because I am so contented that I just don't care and prioritize things above that; sometimes the answer will be no, because I have free time and I see a good opportunity. It depends on circumstances, and you have the choice as to what you want. The program won't remove your choices if you have things offered to you, but it will get you to choose based on what really matters.
(12-12-2014, 10:19 PM)essy Wrote: [ -> ]Shannon,

Your definition of Alpha gave me a sense of elation. I had a moment of clarity where I thought, "I can interpret the sources of negativity past and present as calls to self-actualization. Like Aikido, I can redirect that energy.

P.S. The sword analogy is brilliant.

On a semi-related note:

I've completed John Alexander's book and David DeAngelo's book. I will continue to re-read them. What other books and/or materials that support your definition of alpha do you recommend to supplement AM6?

I recommend that after those, you seek for yourself. I have not continued reading that style of book, since I am and have been working on other things, such as researching how to make these programs better.
(01-06-2015, 01:24 PM)JamesC71 Wrote: [ -> ]It's so interesting reading this thread because not only did it confirm what I thought the AM program was and is really about but also how it's not at all based on getting women or a girlfriend or getting laid. The fact that people focus so much on that is really mind blowing. I am guilty of being that way myself.I used to think if I just met the right woman or girl that everything in my life would be perfect. It didn't and I attracted a lot of women I didn't realize were incredibly toxic until much later.
To me now its more about how I can be the best man possible. To let go of all the mental and emotional garbage that keeps that from happening. To be fair to the guys who seek relationships. The best ones I've ever had were the ones where I wasn't attached to any outcome.
When you just learn to let go of wanting or needing that is often when it comes and I'm sure you have heard that before like I have.
I know people are told to focus on what they want but in all honesty relationships or meeting women is the one thing I've learned you literally have to let go of to get.Nothing scares women away like desperation and trying to hard.I know I've been there.The more I let go of needing outside approval or acknowledgent the better things are for me.

I have observed an interesting phenomenon concerning women. They are so used to being the receivers of aggression and desire for something from men that they auto-assume that you're going to be aggressive and demand that whatever it is you want from them. They are bracing for impact, and they never get a chance to express their own desires that way.

The other day while I was in Las Vegas I happened to decide that it was time to stop working for a bit and refuel the ol' body, so I left the hotel room and went to the bar to have dinner. The thoughts on my mind were of work, and how to solve problems. At the bar I took the opportunity to observe the people around me, as that is always entertaining. But I had no expectations, and no real interest in interacting. I just wanted to eat and solve the issue of which possible option currently under consideration was best for improving the MPME.

There were three bartenders; two men and a woman. The woman did not interact with me at first, I didn't even know she was there for about 15 minutes. When she did make herself obvious to me, I was pleasantly surprised: petite, well proportioned, and had aged very well. This was a woman who could be of interest, but knowing her age (40's), looks (9 to most guys) and occupation, I knew she was going to have miles of walls up. It didn't matter to me, though, because I wasn't there to hit on, or necessarily even talk to her.

She asked me if I had been cared for and I replied that I had ordered dinner already. She then looked around, and asked, "Would you like me to bring you some bread and butter while you wait?" Interesting, because she was not the one who had claim on my tab, but I accepted. She returned and apologized, saying that I probably would not eat all the bread she brought me, but here it was. Interesting again. Why would she care? Why seem bashful about it?

Over the course of the night, she checked on me more than the other two, who were by no means ignoring me. Good service from all three, to be sure. But she was doing just a little bit more. Then she disappeared for a while, and returned. When she returned, she seemed avoidant. Would not come near me, would not look at me, ignored me. This is always a sign that something is making a woman uncomfortable, and based on the fact that she had been treating me the way she had previously, I concluded that she might be attracted and feeling that it was inappropriate for some reason, possibly because she was involved.

When she was talking to some people across the bar from me, back to me, I heard her mention her 5 year old daughter and husband. Aha! Motive. Then I noticed she had a tattoo on her left ring finger and upon asking about it, she said it was her way of honoring her husband while making it practical to work by removing her wedding ring: the tattoo was his name. Clever. And the more I thought about it, the more I admired her way of honoring him. I told her so, and she seemed hugely relieved, as if she was worried that I was going to hit on her and she would have to reject me. When I never made a move, but instead expressed admiration for how she was honoring her husband, she was not just appreciative, but realized that I respected her relationship and I was not going to make a move. Suddenly there was no pressure on her.

Her response? She suddenly opened up again, and started enjoying my company again. She started actually giving me IOIs again, and when I went to leave, she made sure to be there to thank me for coming in, expressed how she had enjoyed my company and asked if I was going to return. When I replied that I had to be in Vegas again in a few weeks, she rather personally invited me back.

In other words, I did not attack, so she was free to express her own interests and attractions, whether or not she could act on them beyond friendship, and enjoying my company and conversation. Now, because I was needless and respectful, I have an in with her that other guys don't. She is willing to allow me to come closer, and if I play my cards right, I know I can absolutely get her in bed. Do I want to? Not if she's married... but I know I can. Desperation kills the gentleness that allows for success with a lot of women of real value.
Shannon can you remake and rehash with further explanation of Transcendental Alpha?

I love reading your words. It feel so deep and I want to read it again with new perspective (new experiences you have experienced).

Seriously. Write a book about Transcendental Alpha. I buy in an instant!!!!
There's always something valuable in your posts, Shannon.
Ok I'm a bit confused. I reread this thread and I don't off hand recall who it was but they said more than once how these RSD guys go out 5-7 times or nights a week to meet women.I know very little to nothing about the RSD people but if you have been doing this for 10-15 years I have to question not only the person doing that but anyone who thinks this is even remotely alpha or even healthy. I get wanting to meet new people but that amount of time put into it not only seems incredibly excessive but you're also whether you know it or not basing your potential happiness or self worth on an external outcome or source that you have no control over.
Being alpha is eliminating the need for outside or external factors to dictate not only who you are but what you focus on.I wasted a lot of years thinking all I needed to do was meet the right girl/woman and my life would be perfect. I based all of my happiness not only on that but on constantly seeking approval from others and paranoid as **** if I even thought someone might be mad at me.It's no wonder I developed severe anxiety and I'm often surprised I didn't get an ulcer or 4.
When the AM description states " unconcerned with getting the girl" to me it means not being attached to an outcome. That in itself I would think would be incredibly freeing in that you don't feel any internal pressure to force something to work or make something happen which allows you to relax which I would think would also by extension allow whoever you meet to feel more relaxed as well as they don't feel pressured.
I used to read PUA material but I don't like the fact that its all or at least a lot of what I read seemed to be about trying to in some way trick or manipulate a girl/woman to like you or sleep with you.Does anyone think a real genuine alpha needs to do that? I will say though that when I did read PUA stuff the one thing that stuck out to me was the inner game .I'm not entirely sure how that is defined by the PUA community but I would think if folks were more concerned with developing who they are or want to be as men then everything thing else would fall into place.
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