Subliminal Talk

SM 2011 is going to help me with that! ;-)

Started to use it 2 days ago, 10. February.


Yesterday I went out and for the first time I really counted how many women I had talked to throughout the evening.

It made me more motivated to do it but also the result were like one of these things where you think "Yes, it's like this. I've just never gathered myself to decide to do it and have an estimate count".

In the club, early night, one of the girls I talked with throughout the night was a fine-looking woman. Introduced myself and we shook hands and she just held it. I said something bullshit to her and her friend. Then she whispered something to each other and then her friend left and then she said, "you are so much bullshitting".
It was obvious she wanted to use me. Anyways, she says, lets just have some fun and ask me if I dance. She takes my hand and we go up to the dance floor, grinding each other and other groups of women were looking at us. We danced to one song. We went back to sit again and I could just have kissed her there if I wanted. She mentioned earlier she was 30 because I also bullshitted.
So I asked, "seriously, how old are you?" and she looked at me like, come on dude, I just want to have fun, and said 26.
Then I said something about a time when I dated a too young girl that I didn't knew of and then she was said she had to get to her friend.

Later I bumped into them again and she asked me if I could buy her a drink. I said, "we are not in the 19th century anymore" and her friend whispered to me while walking past me, "she loves it when a guy buys her drink". These were gamers for real lol.


- LM

Do you remember exactly what you said to her when you first met her? things escalated pretty quickly and she obviously just wanted to make out with you as soon as you guys were done grinding each other.

Just said something bullshit about my name. These things girls (who's got some game) usually do to guys in a bar/club environment.


Stage 1 - Day 5,


It seems like many girls just want to make out as fast as possible, if a guy is at least a little standing out from all the others in a club/bar environment.

Yesterday night I went to 3 different bars by myself. I felt very uncomfortable. I had this subconscious fight or it was like my body didn't want either to enter the first bar by myself. I walked past the bar and waited 5 minutes before I went back and entered.

First bar, few people, not a very sociable context at the time I was there. Drank a beer, talked a bit with the bartenders and went over to a table with two girls, made them laugh and think I was sweet and left.

Second bar, a friend of mine was there. Took a beer, talked with a girl my friend knew. She wasn't from around town, so she was very different, very open but our interaction was not very communicative and not very fun either because I've just adapted how to talk to the "girls in this city". Went up to the bar were 2 pretty ladies were sitting, told a joke which they didn't find funny. Then I tried another one and they loved it

Later I talked with my buddy's, friends girlfriend, who said, "He's the first guy who still wanted me, even though I withheld sex the first night". Interesting stuff...

I was going to take off and I wanted to talk with the girls at the bar one more time. So I go up, talk with one of them. While talking to the girl I wanted, her friend began to make out massively with a guy who just came up. Later they told me she's not usually like that and it was her first time doing that, usually it's her friend (the one I wanted) who does that. The interaction got stall. I hugged both of them and the friend of the girl I wanted said I was so cute, and I left with the number of the girl, who I wanted.

Third bar, I was feeling a bit good after that interaction. I enter the bar, pleasantly amount of people. I walked towards the bar and I see two girls sitting at a table waving to me and is like "Heey!!" like they knew me. So I played along and sat with them. They gave me a beer to cheer with them and we talked. 4 girls intensely listening to what I had to say. Doesn't happen often but I definitely had the right attitude, with the right things to say at the right time.

I was "the mysterious, hot & cute guy".

At a point, while I was talking with them, one of them pushed her legs against mine and her lap and she took my hand under the table and cuddled my lap. The most aggressive one but also most dominant one in the group. I reciprocated it from time to time.

She asked for my number before she left. I gave it and as she was going to say goodbye to me, she leaned in from behind while I was sitting and I looked to the side, it was a quick weird moment because it either it was supposed to be a kiss on the lips or the chin. She kissed me on the chin.

Now it was three girls and me. I found two of them attractive enough to go out with but the one I went for said that she didn't want to do it because I've already chosen her friend, who had left. Anyways we went up dancing a little sexually.

So the other girl who I also found attractive thought it was game-over for her so this guy who seemed pretty, with fine body and not a creepy attitude sat at the table and as soon I came back to the table, she literally pushed the guy out and went with him.

It ends with people getting tired, I was going to leave and the girl who took the other guy asked if I wanted her number. Which I replied with, "Do you want me to have your number?" which she replied "yes, why else would I say it?" I said, "I don't know. It could be a test.", she said she didn't test and I said, sure you do, maybe just doing it unconsciously.

I took her number and I hugged all 3 of them and left.

Earlier today the last girl wrote to me. I replied and wrote two specialized text to the other two 5 hours later, around 17. None of them have replied though.


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What I have noticed SM already has an effect on are; I'm much more detached for whatever could happen. Also I'm less attention-seeking (this is something that I do unconsciously sometimes). One thing more is that I get a hard-on when I'm laying in bed and listening to the sub


- LM

Shit. Both of the girls from the same social group wrote me a text at the exact same time. They are talking with each other about my texts. One of them wrote, "... I also want to meet xyz!" lol

This feels fragile...

The erections from listening to the sub happen because it's designed to increase your sexual energy and sex drive. The girls sharing the information about you? There's only one way to deal with that. Be 100% honest and transparent. Own your choices, actions and desires. Speak your mind, but be polite. If you play your cards right... they may end up both being your lover at the same time, if that's what you want. If it's not, then pick one, or pick neither, and be friends.

Thanks for the advice Shannon.

I can't go serious. It will ruin it. I don't know the girls very well yet and what I want is just few girls in my life, who I can have a good, fun, sexy time with, without obligations.

This is new to me, so I have to just experiment with it. hmmm

Stage 1 - Day 10,


I feel more detached from women than before I think..

I'll talk with some girls and if they can't see the fun or if they aren't welcoming, I'll just look at them for few seconds, then I'll stand up and say "it was nice to talk to you" without looking at them. I don't feel the need to at all.

Also I'll talk with a girl, she has nothing interesting to say and I'll just wait a few seconds and then walk away.


Something strange happened to me today. I've never got a response like that from a woman before.

It was on the bus, on my way home from crossfit. I lock eye-contact with this beautiful woman or at least it seemed like that the first time. I took a seat. At my stop, I walked over to her, and she took her earbuds off, and said;
"I just wanted to tell you, you are fantastic "

She broke eye contact, looked away and said: "No.. Don't say that" not even looking." while putting her earbud back on. She was married I'm sure but man.. where's the feminine spirit..?

I naturally responded, "why not?" and left the bus. I felt more alive afterwards because I was a bit nervous when I did go up and tell her that. There were people just in her front seat and back seat, who were stunned about what I did but I just did what I wanted. I deserve that.

A thing I'm thinking about is; SM makes you feel detached / non-needy but what about motivation for going for what you want? Are these things going to be worked on in the latter stages?
I mean putting effort in it. I have to focus and concentrate a lot to get motivation and find the fun in putting effort in it.

Hmm...

I've had a rough day last sunday,

I had a void that could be felt from the inside, like from my soul. I began to see Titanic, which I haven't seen for a very long time.

I don't think I've cried that much in a very long time. After the movie I felt really empty, like a grief. When I laid myself down to sleep I had a feeling of loneliness and needed some love but at the same time I didn't wanted to have anyone being near me. I began crying from my soul on and off. Felt somehow really vulnerable and late night I got it together and told my mom about how I felt. Then I began crying again and felt really, really vulnerable.

I've had this feeling before and it's a really annoying mix of feelings, which I hope I do not experience again. I have no clear idea what caused it. I'm sure it had something to do with the "love and adventure" in Titanic, which I thought was amazing and that I lack these things myself.

A feeling of loneliness, emptiness, no meaning with the life.

Anyways, I got it better the next day after some martial arts but I do feel I'm not as confident as before. Though I feel that I am more real in some way...

Stage 1 - Day 15,


I have noticed that I'm much more non-needy than I use to be with women when I'm out with them. It feels great that the urge of needing a woman's affection and validation is far away and have turned into a little bit seed

Went on a date yesterday with one of the girls I met in the last bar the night where I was out by myself. I chose her over her close friend...

We started to have coffee together. When I went in for a kiss after about 15 minutes of interaction, I did it slowly. Controlled, yet it felt smooth.
Anyways, we went to a bar later and to the cinema by the end.

There was quite a few times where she would tease me that when I went in to kiss her, she would give me her chin or she would not go into the kiss herself.
As she did this, I would either just kiss her on the chin or just lean back and watch the movie with no hard feelings.

And then she would suddenly be besides me with her head and wanting me to kiss her. So I did, and she would take my arm, cuddling and also lean her head against my shoulder

I just want her to feel pleasure and good. To me I want to give her the best treat but also maintain my manliness.

Hmm.. I think this is a pretty big step for me, the mindset shift. I used to put very little, if no effort in being with a girl. Now I try to make it great but still try to be myself and not trying to impress...

Going to see her again Tuesday but our logistics aren't very great for sex, since we both are still haven't moved out yet. I do have a plan for the weekend though


- LM

One step at a time. Progress is still progress.

I went out with the girl today.

It was kinda strange because we talked very little. When we met up we kissed and then I took her to do something "crazy". We went over to get something to eat afterwards and she paid for it. These moments I had the dreamy look and feeling when I looked at her and she said I should stop looking at her like that.

After eating we didn't have any plans to go anywhere. So I suggested to go to the lake. We did and I felt that she didn't want this as much as I did. We took the same train home and on the way home she was kinda distant, so I tried to stay distant too but it was hard. When I did do it though she either took my hand or touched me somewhere.

Just before I got off the train I made a bit out with her and told her we could talk and text about the next meet up perhaps in the weekend. Gave her a quick last kiss and left. I looked back over my shoulder but she was already looking down in her bag, not looking very happy either.

I felt terrible afterwards. It felt bad for my soul.

I regained after a couple of hours but still had a slight urge to text her something. Anyways, my plan is to meet up with her in the weekend and take her on a little adventure and bring her home for a treat. If that fails to happen, I have been advised to stop putting effort in it anymore.

Thoughts, welcome!

A woman who does not communicate effectively is expecting you to read her mind. If you are not communicating you are expecting her to read your mind. My money is on neither of you being mind readers. Solution: open, honest communication.

Stage 1 - Day 20,


Turns out the girl lost attraction for me after our 2. date;

Life is like a box of chocolates!

Had planned to meet a cute girl earlier yesterday for our 3.rd date. I've used plenty of time to set it up and putting effort in it. (Also really the first girl I really have put effort in it and forethought about it)

Though I were going to bars friday night. Ends up I meet a girl and we hit it off. With no to very little sleep because of the cute girl I met in the bar. I took off from our room and went out with the girl I had planned to go out with.

When we were out I immediately found out and felt this feeling that she didn't wanted it. Every time I kissed her she would just give a quick one.

In the end on our way home from some bowling, she could choose to go home and meet with her friends later or come home with me. I tell her what I thought and was being open and honest to her and she tells me that I'm too sweet / I've become too sweet.

I'm like laughing out loud to myself. Thinking, "really? I just had an amazing time with this other cute girl last night. This was definitely not what I had expected, especially because she accepted to go out with me one more time even though our second date went very badly."

I was looking forward to please this girl, to give her the best treat, had planned a good sweet surprise, yet she didn't want it.
So I didn't tell her about the surprise I was going to give her, (Ben&Jerry's, Champagne, Dark chocolate) and I kissed her a quick kiss in the end and wished her the best (the sweet luxuries are going to another cute girl ;-))...


- LM

Now you have to overcome the Nice Guy curse, it seems. Stop worrying about pleasing them. You're killing the attraction.