Yesterday was my first day of OGSF2. I’ve got a private journal going. I’ll probably post here some still. People are complicated and posting is both healthy and unhealthy for me. There’s part of me that seeks validation/approval like someone using facebook, and there’s part of me that just wants to share and be part of a community. I figure the offline journal can be where I post stuff regularly, and then I’ll try to post here intentionally, as opposed to compulsively.
Anyways, the TID on OGSF2 has been crazy. Leading up to the first listen I felt major shame with an undercurrent of fear. A bit after I listened I noticed some more comfort, some shifts where I felt my sinuses draining like I had unblocked something, and a feeling like a warm blanket over my emotions. The shame I was feeling was almost overwhelming but I didn’t let myself identify with, intensify, judge, or react to it. I noticed when I got up to move around I could feel this sense of comfort in the background which wasn’t noticeable when I was laying down feeling the shame.
I can feel that OGSF2 is a heavy hitter and I’m excited to experience these next level shifts. I’m proud that I genuinely want to become a better person with unshakeable values through OGSF2. I do want to run OGSF2 to get other stuff more easily, but I really do want to run it just for the results it gives as well. I’ll also try to enjoy the process.
It’s only been a week and I’m already extremely impressed.
Congratulations! Hope you can tell us about your results - if you want to!
(12-10-2023, 03:29 AM)Frosted Wrote: [ -> ]It’s only been a week and I’m already extremely impressed.
Of course right after I said this the other shoe dropped. I’ve been dealing with massive insecurities. The kind that lie at the bottom of the sea never to be touched, if you know what I mean. Dark night of the soul kind of insecurities.
(12-10-2023, 02:27 PM)Inconceivablezen Wrote: [ -> ]Congratulations! Hope you can tell us about your results - if you want to!
I was noticing deeper changes happening with ease. For example I was getting flashes of a deep sense of peace. Other stuff happened, but I can’t remember. I mostly noticed what the subliminal was doing in places and the scope and the overall speed and effecriveness impressed me. The changes I was experiencing didn’t feel like they could come from only a week of a subliminal. It felt like an “experience”. I can see now why Shannon wants to rebrand subliminals to “experiences” now.
But like I alluded to earlier, then I had my insecurities hit me over the head with a sack of potatoes. We’ll see how things go, but this isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Just unpleasant. This stuff is what’s been stopping me from the deeper results I’ve craved all this time. Hopefully, if I don’t conquer guilt shame and fear this run, at least I hope I make a massive dent in them.
I’m finishing my last on day of cycle 2 today. So it’s been about 19/20 days so far.
Turns out guilt has been a massive blind spot for me. I’ve been mistaking it for fear and other times not even noticing it for some reason. I just had a massive clearing of guilt and it made me think that it being a blind spot had somehow hindered its removal.
For example I have this tightness in my throat which I thought was purely fear, but it turns out a lot of it is from guilt. In fact I think a lot of my inaction stems from not just fear and shame, but a lot of guilt. As a kid I was taught that I wasn’t good enough unless I got an A so I felt like I needed to be perfect. I was guilted and shamed for inaction as well imperfection. So what’s the point of taking action if it’s not perfect? I’m wrong so any action I take can’t be perfect, or eventually it won’t be perfect and I’ll feel inadequate.
Headaches and stuff like nausea I complained about on OGSF1 are improving. They’re build up of emotion and as I heal I feel lighter and in less pain in those areas. A clearing may involve tears and a clearing of the sinuses.
Things are progressing faster and deeper than expected. This is only a short taste of the stuff I’m working through. I’m extremely impressed with OGSF2 and 5.11g so far.
(12-21-2023, 04:18 PM)Frosted Wrote: [ -> ]As a kid I was taught that I wasn’t good enough unless I got an A so I felt like I needed to be perfect. I was guilted and shamed for inaction as well imperfection. So what’s the point of taking action if it’s not perfect? I’m wrong so any action I take can’t be perfect, or eventually it won’t be perfect and I’ll feel inadequate.
My parents built this unintentionally into me when I was young. Telling me I'm very smart, etc. But, that gave me very high expectations of myself and if I ever got a B, I'd throw away that test somewhere and didn't show it to my parents out of shame. My parents are very loving, don't get me wrong, but this created a toxic perfectionism in me,
that has given me tons of upsides as well, in life. I could more or less retire at age 35, four years out of college, among other things, by always pushing the limit. But, the loss is sense of peace in life...
On UMS2 my brain was trying to go into overdrive but pain and apathy were in the way. By overdrive I mean this success based hustle state similar to a pro sports player drawing out everything they have into a performance. Some of that has cleared and I’m getting a little taste of it and it’s awesome. The funny part is that I didn’t even realize I was doing it until I reflected.
I’ve been putting off posting because I notice a kernel of unhealthiness in it. It’s like a part of me that can’t let go wants to make something more real. I also don’t like so many insights going to waste, but I can’t post every time I have a shift anyways lol.
Anyways, OGSF2 is fucking crazy. I don’t know if it’s because I was ready for this level of change due to previous subs or what, but the results I’m getting are the best I’ve had from a subliminal yet. I’ve been waiting for, in my mind what I’ve been calling, the “tipping point”. I can feel that I’m about to cross some kind of threshold of change, and I’ve been alluding to this since awhile back at the end of my 2 year LTU6 marathon.
I don’t know how close I am to this tipping point, but it’s like I can hear beautiful music far away through a bunch of walls, and slowly the walls have been dissolving and the music has gotten louder. Before I might have thought “maybe the music isn’t real (not getting results)”. But as the music gets louder I’m like “holy shit how do subliminals like this exist and how is it so easy/powerful”. But I predict this tipping point will be reached sometime in 2 years. Or it’s possible it will be a series of tipping points that are reached, sort of like a tree finally reaching the fruiting stage after years of growth and “nothing to show for it” until it finally can produce fruit.
I’m really realizing at a deep level how important healing/clearing is. It’s easy to be like “yeah yeah, that’s the important stuff, I guess I’ll do it to get what I REALLY want” but at the end of the day healing/clearing is what we “really want” deep down. It’s just painful so parts of us avoid it and look for compensation. Like as I step out of fear and into love things slowly start to click and become easier/better and the things I thought I needed because of fear I don’t because I’m enjoying myself more.
Can’t wait till AM7 comes out, possibly in as little as 3 or 4 months! If AM7 doesn’t come out before 6 months of OGSF2 then I’ll do 6 months of OGSF2. I can’t believe the results I’m getting after only 1 month.
Edit: also I’d like to say there was a lot of the previous subliminals removing bad stuff and it’s sometimes harder to notice that (esp with the naturalizer) and it’s like the tree/fruiting analogy before where there was a lot of garbage removal that didn’t create the results I wanted, but it’s neccesary. It’s not a perfect analogy though because I’m starting to see the ghost of my future results and I’m excited. Maybe I see the unripe fruit growing and know it will soon be ripe and juicy.
I feel like I’m having AM7 TID even though there’s no way this could be true.
Hey great journal
That's really cool to read
I’ve been having the most vivid dreams on OGSF2, but last night the dreams were especially interesting. They were both fantastical, strange and some of them were even lucid with a small amount of control over them.
Edit: On my UMS2 journal I mentioned my brain seemed to be transitioning from 2d to 4d. Well it feels like that for my dreams on OGSF2. Also whatever changes in that vein UMS2 was making seem to have carried over to OGSF2 working on them. Perhaps the metaphor of 2d to 4d means my mind is decompressing and using other areas of cognition rather than static “2d” thoughts.
(01-10-2024, 05:26 AM)Topaz Wrote: [ -> ]Hey great journal
That's really cool to read
Thanks man!
(01-09-2024, 06:48 PM)Frosted Wrote: [ -> ]I feel like I’m having AM7 TID even though there’s no way this could be true.
I think I was just dealing with some similar stuff that I had been dealing with on AM7. Boundaries and stuff like that.
The awesome results continue…
(01-14-2024, 01:54 PM)Frosted Wrote: [ -> ] (01-09-2024, 06:48 PM)Frosted Wrote: [ -> ]I feel like I’m having AM7 TID even though there’s no way this could be true.
I think I was just dealing with some similar stuff that I had been dealing with on AM7. Boundaries and stuff like that.
The awesome results continue…
What do you mean by AM7 TID?
I guess you mean the results are better than expected?