Hello Everyone,
I haven't wrote on here in years. I gave up on subs many years ago until OF came out and did Version 2 for almost 8 months last year. It was turbulent and overall just made me more easy going. I felt I became more assertive but at the same time more apathetic. I'm was overall more content with myself but find myself in a rut and living in a routine. Still feel this deep rooted sense of doubt of everything in my life. Overall not happy with it. This causes me sleep issues and I wake up in the middle of the night in panic. This been happening before the use of the OF sub so I have just become accustomed to it. Simply just going back to sleep.
I switched to DMSI as it was 5.8G and newer. Started in January and during the first week people told me they didn't know I could be so extroverted. This surprised me because I'm usually stuck in my head and introverted. I haven't really been extroverted in many years. I tend to be to myself and only talk when spoken to. So I didn't notice I was talking to others more. Strange. This didn't sit well with some as it seemed they didn't want to talk with me after some time. I do not think I experienced more ways of saying "please leave" then I did in January. Guess I annoyed them. The 2nd week felt like doing 2 loops. I noticed I wake up in the middle of the night with an intense erection. To the point is was bothering my sleep. This happened like 3 nights. 3rd week I switched to 3 loops per day. This is when I'd notice at the gym more attractive women out of no where and I would be making more eye contact with them. I am not good at meeting strangers (men or women) and it has been a problem for me since childhood so I never went up to approach any of these women. I feel deep down I am not deserving of these women. I kept doing 3 loops of Ultrasonic until all the results stopped immediately at the end of January. I was no longer talkative and felt in a constant state of mental haze. Constantly tired and fatigued. Sex drive is non existent. Checked testosterone levels and they are normal so that isn't it.
Kept doing 3 loops last week to no avail. I feel I went back to the way I was before starting DMSI. I feel lonely and depressed. In a rut and not very social anymore. I wake up in the middle of the night with intense panic attacks now. Before I could just go back to sleep but now I can't do that at all and tend to stay awake for an hour or two. I feel I became too dependent on the results and as a result if things are not happening I just feel worthless and hopeless.
I went down to 2 loops of US this week and now feel less brain fog. 3 loops was too much for me and drained too much energy as I noticed I did not have energy for a lot of things I was doing. My workouts suffered the most. No longer feeling strong or willing to workout. Emotionally depressed and down on myself still.
I talked to a friend about this and he said I just have a fear of success as I feel deep inside me I do not deserve it and if I did have success I would be in fear of losing it. So I tend to do not even go for it in the first place. Then out of no where I felt like I got hit in the head with a pan and went physically numb. I became light headed and really incoherent. I do not drink at all. After this I just went home and fell asleep. This physical response is something I have never experienced before ever in my life. It was what led me to write on here as something so out of the ordinary happened. No idea what this could mean. Did I make a breakthrough? Am I overthinking this? I just do not know.
I will continue to do 2 loops and see where things go from here.
If you’re open to suggestions, I recommend LTU6 or the new UH for when you’re done with DMSI. LTU6 has helped my severe mental issues tremendously. It didn’t all happen in one run but it has so much content packed into it (including Ultra Success which might help with you’re feeling like you don’t deserve success and also extreme self esteem would help too). It also has E4 in it and a bunch of other goodies.
Good luck on the DMSI run though, it’s nice to see you again man!
@
dbzjakecake What you are describing is a classic case of DMSI working, and getting results from someone who has been very fearful and therefore shut down and uncalibrated, who then opens up and has to begin the process of calibrating (being told to leave a lot in January). We see that a lot with people during their first run through or two of AM also.
Then you hit a nerve and shut down out of subconscious terror. The parts of you getting those results were either too afraid to continue, or they were shut down and or overridden by some part of you that is terrified of the success in achieving the goal you would have experienced otherwise.
There are four main options from here.
1. Stop doing DMSI and accept defeat.
2. Start over at 1 loop per day and increase by +1 loops per ASRB2 cycle until you find the level at which you are responding again.
3. Start at (X+1) loops per day and increase by +1 loops per ASRB2 cycle until you find the level at which you are responding again, where X is the number of loops you were using when you experienced shutdown. That is, go to 4 loops per day and move up from there.
4. Use a different program to try to help you work through the fears and issues that are causing you to shut down.
It is obvious to me that you will not achieve the goals of DMSI by choosing option 1. It is possible through options 2, 3 and 4, but I suspect your best results will come from option 4, as has been suggested previously.
The options for that are going to be OFv3, E5, LTU or UH, with UH being by far the best choice because it is OF, E5, DRS and 5.8G all in one. It is also a minimum of about 12x the FRM impact of OFv3, and if prie is a concern, you can subscribe to it. That is what I suggest. Use that for the next 6 months and then try DMSI again.
(02-11-2022, 12:13 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]The options for that are going to be OFv3, E5, LTU or UH, with UH being by far the best choice because it is OF, E5, DRS and 5.8G all in one. It is also a minimum of about 12x the FRM impact of OFv3,
Wow, well I think I know which sub I will try next
I have listened to Shannon's advice and dropped DMSI for now and brought UH. I will stick to this sub for a minimum of 6 months. Will be doing Ultrasonic on Samsung Galaxy phone at 12/15 volume.
Changed the title of the journal as well.
Will keep everyone posted with the progress being made.
ran first cycle of UH nearing the end of the off days
Feel total calmness. There have been times I get a flood of negative thoughts but no physical response to them. They just come and go but I feel nothing towards them. Sleep has improved drastically. No more panic attacks in the middle of sleep. THANK GOD!
I have noticed I feel uncomfortable in my own skin nowadays. Like more shy and timid than before. Which is odd because I feel this way in areas I was comfortable in like around close friends or at the gym. Feel I become more self-conscious.
Great result.. so you were having panic attacks while sleeping regularly until you started using UH?
Is feeling uncomfortable since starting UH? Sounds like it's digging something up and working on it. The best way to explain it that we used to describe years ago is it's like you're in a dark room and the subliminal is a torch and it's suddenly shining on something that was hiding in the dark and now it's much more obvious for a while.
If UH brought this up then it means it's digging deeper into those issues, it's especially interesting if OF and DMSI didn't do so and this is bringing it up, not fun but a good sign of it going deeper.
The month of March was just bland
Felt depressed the whole month and would just distract myself from how I felt with procrastination. I was very unproductive even though I had more than enough time available to do things. Feel like a failure
Feel more lost and confused. Like life is empty. Low mood and just feel like sleeping alot more. Been much more quiet and actually more fearful of things. For example, social interactions or presentations. I still do them but they don't feel natural anymore. I have to force myself to do them and it feels very awkward. This feeling of constant anxiety is very unpleasant. I feel more of a loner and been isolating myself more. Not enjoying life and ashamed to be in the presence of others. No panic attacks still so that is a great sign.
Physically I was feeling immense pain especially in my lower back and right shoulder. Lower back pain has been an issue for many years. In the beginning of March it was a whole other level though. I would wake up in the middle of the night with immense tightness and pain in my lower back which prevented me from sleeping properly and walking properly. I was not doing anything to exuberate this pain. Right shoulder would hurt only during immense stress like lifting. I went to a chiropractor like three times but that didn't help at all. Now this has stopped and don't feel it at all especially my right shoulder. It feels like it just disappeared out of the blue. I been able to workout my right shoulder and do not feel the pain anymore. I was able to push more weight which really surprised me. I still have tightness in my lower back but no longer feel the immense pain I was feeling in the beginning of the month. But it has caused me to pay more attention to these body parts to make sure nothing will cause that pain again.
The times I felt better and more happy was on my off days when the sub was not playing. I wouldn't even notice anything but be in higher spirits.
(04-03-2022, 05:28 AM)dbzjakecake Wrote: [ -> ]The month of March was just bland
Felt depressed the whole month and would just distract myself from how I felt with procrastination. I was very unproductive even though I had more than enough time available to do things. Feel like a failure
Feel more lost and confused. Like life is empty. Low mood and just feel like sleeping alot more. Been much more quiet and actually more fearful of things. For example, social interactions or presentations. I still do them but they don't feel natural anymore. I have to force myself to do them and it feels very awkward. This feeling of constant anxiety is very unpleasant. I feel more of a loner and been isolating myself more. Not enjoying life and ashamed to be in the presence of others. No panic attacks still so that is a great sign.
Physically I was feeling immense pain especially in my lower back and right shoulder. Lower back pain has been an issue for many years. In the beginning of March it was a whole other level though. I would wake up in the middle of the night with immense tightness and pain in my lower back which prevented me from sleeping properly and walking properly. I was not doing anything to exuberate this pain. Right shoulder would hurt only during immense stress like lifting. I went to a chiropractor like three times but that didn't help at all. Now this has stopped and don't feel it at all especially my right shoulder. It feels like it just disappeared out of the blue. I been able to workout my right shoulder and do not feel the pain anymore. I was able to push more weight which really surprised me. I still have tightness in my lower back but no longer feel the immense pain I was feeling in the beginning of the month. But it has caused me to pay more attention to these body parts to make sure nothing will cause that pain again.
The times I felt better and more happy was on my off days when the sub was not playing. I wouldn't even notice anything but be in higher spirits.
What are your usage patterns?
(04-03-2022, 03:08 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ] (04-03-2022, 05:28 AM)dbzjakecake Wrote: [ -> ]The month of March was just bland
Felt depressed the whole month and would just distract myself from how I felt with procrastination. I was very unproductive even though I had more than enough time available to do things. Feel like a failure
Feel more lost and confused. Like life is empty. Low mood and just feel like sleeping alot more. Been much more quiet and actually more fearful of things. For example, social interactions or presentations. I still do them but they don't feel natural anymore. I have to force myself to do them and it feels very awkward. This feeling of constant anxiety is very unpleasant. I feel more of a loner and been isolating myself more. Not enjoying life and ashamed to be in the presence of others. No panic attacks still so that is a great sign.
Physically I was feeling immense pain especially in my lower back and right shoulder. Lower back pain has been an issue for many years. In the beginning of March it was a whole other level though. I would wake up in the middle of the night with immense tightness and pain in my lower back which prevented me from sleeping properly and walking properly. I was not doing anything to exuberate this pain. Right shoulder would hurt only during immense stress like lifting. I went to a chiropractor like three times but that didn't help at all. Now this has stopped and don't feel it at all especially my right shoulder. It feels like it just disappeared out of the blue. I been able to workout my right shoulder and do not feel the pain anymore. I was able to push more weight which really surprised me. I still have tightness in my lower back but no longer feel the immense pain I was feeling in the beginning of the month. But it has caused me to pay more attention to these body parts to make sure nothing will cause that pain again.
The times I felt better and more happy was on my off days when the sub was not playing. I wouldn't even notice anything but be in higher spirits.
What are your usage patterns?
I been doing 9 days then 5 days off. Around 6 loops during my sleep. Format is
Ultrasonic played on my Samsung Galaxy phone at 12/15 volume.
This round I was thinking of doing 10 days on and 5 days off.
(04-04-2022, 12:57 AM)dbzjakecake Wrote: [ -> ] (04-03-2022, 03:08 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ] (04-03-2022, 05:28 AM)dbzjakecake Wrote: [ -> ]The month of March was just bland
Felt depressed the whole month and would just distract myself from how I felt with procrastination. I was very unproductive even though I had more than enough time available to do things. Feel like a failure
Feel more lost and confused. Like life is empty. Low mood and just feel like sleeping alot more. Been much more quiet and actually more fearful of things. For example, social interactions or presentations. I still do them but they don't feel natural anymore. I have to force myself to do them and it feels very awkward. This feeling of constant anxiety is very unpleasant. I feel more of a loner and been isolating myself more. Not enjoying life and ashamed to be in the presence of others. No panic attacks still so that is a great sign.
Physically I was feeling immense pain especially in my lower back and right shoulder. Lower back pain has been an issue for many years. In the beginning of March it was a whole other level though. I would wake up in the middle of the night with immense tightness and pain in my lower back which prevented me from sleeping properly and walking properly. I was not doing anything to exuberate this pain. Right shoulder would hurt only during immense stress like lifting. I went to a chiropractor like three times but that didn't help at all. Now this has stopped and don't feel it at all especially my right shoulder. It feels like it just disappeared out of the blue. I been able to workout my right shoulder and do not feel the pain anymore. I was able to push more weight which really surprised me. I still have tightness in my lower back but no longer feel the immense pain I was feeling in the beginning of the month. But it has caused me to pay more attention to these body parts to make sure nothing will cause that pain again.
The times I felt better and more happy was on my off days when the sub was not playing. I wouldn't even notice anything but be in higher spirits.
What are your usage patterns?
I been doing 9 days then 5 days off. Around 6 loops during my sleep. Format is Ultrasonic played on my Samsung Galaxy phone at 12/15 volume.
This round I was thinking of doing 10 days on and 5 days off.
You're using it that much and getting no AutoConfig signals?
(04-06-2022, 05:15 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ] (04-04-2022, 12:57 AM)dbzjakecake Wrote: [ -> ] (04-03-2022, 03:08 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ] (04-03-2022, 05:28 AM)dbzjakecake Wrote: [ -> ]The month of March was just bland
Felt depressed the whole month and would just distract myself from how I felt with procrastination. I was very unproductive even though I had more than enough time available to do things. Feel like a failure
Feel more lost and confused. Like life is empty. Low mood and just feel like sleeping alot more. Been much more quiet and actually more fearful of things. For example, social interactions or presentations. I still do them but they don't feel natural anymore. I have to force myself to do them and it feels very awkward. This feeling of constant anxiety is very unpleasant. I feel more of a loner and been isolating myself more. Not enjoying life and ashamed to be in the presence of others. No panic attacks still so that is a great sign.
Physically I was feeling immense pain especially in my lower back and right shoulder. Lower back pain has been an issue for many years. In the beginning of March it was a whole other level though. I would wake up in the middle of the night with immense tightness and pain in my lower back which prevented me from sleeping properly and walking properly. I was not doing anything to exuberate this pain. Right shoulder would hurt only during immense stress like lifting. I went to a chiropractor like three times but that didn't help at all. Now this has stopped and don't feel it at all especially my right shoulder. It feels like it just disappeared out of the blue. I been able to workout my right shoulder and do not feel the pain anymore. I was able to push more weight which really surprised me. I still have tightness in my lower back but no longer feel the immense pain I was feeling in the beginning of the month. But it has caused me to pay more attention to these body parts to make sure nothing will cause that pain again.
The times I felt better and more happy was on my off days when the sub was not playing. I wouldn't even notice anything but be in higher spirits.
What are your usage patterns?
I been doing 9 days then 5 days off. Around 6 loops during my sleep. Format is Ultrasonic played on my Samsung Galaxy phone at 12/15 volume.
This round I was thinking of doing 10 days on and 5 days off.
You're using it that much and getting no AutoConfig signals?
Hey Shannon,
I never felt like increasing the number of loops but wanted to increase the days on and decrease the days off. Last month just went with 10 days on and 5 days off. Haven't felt or had urges to change usage patterns.
April was okay. Was pretty much neutral overall. I don't get super happy but I don't get super low either. I felt more social and talkative with people. No physical aches or pains. I don't wake up tired anymore even after 8-9 hours of sleep.
Internally still lost and confused. My whole life I just followed what others told me and lived in fear. Now I am thinking of what I want. But the true question really is, "what is it that I want?". I have no clue what I really want in my life. I always thought external things would fulfil me but they never did. Now I just think it is all hopeless unless I become truly whole in the inside first. Working on that now.
June is over. Still doing 10 days on and 5 days off.
Nothing internally to really report. Probably an increase in fear. This is because of the amount of pain I been experiencing in June. Started June with back pain out of no where but not severe at all. I just stretched and went on with my days with minor discomfort. Then mid June the pain worsened to Sharp back pains and was very unbearable. Which is very odd because I was not lifting or physically active. I was actually more inactive than I usually am. I ended up in the hospital and found out I suffer from degenerative disc disease and I have two herniations. My vertebrae was impinging my nerves. Been bed ridden and waiting to get better. I can barely walk right now but at least the severe sharp pains have subsided with the medications. Hoping UH can heal this as well and I can recover quickly.