Subliminal Talk

How did I get here
I listened to E3 and DRS for exactly three months: May, June and July. At the end of July I stopped listening to give my mind some rest before starting LTU6. Because of ASRB2, my last day on DRS was actually two days earlier, July 29th. 
I had to restart DRS on August 7th (one day after ASRB2 was supposed to end) because I was getting hit too hard by the usual boatloads of sh*t aimed my way. I managed to complete 10 days of break from E3 however. 

My journey begins
I’ll start listening to LTU6 tonight but, like I said, TID hit me like a train today. I got up way too late, got nothing done all day, f*cked up the only thing I did, forgot to take a medicine, and finally had a nervous breakdown at 6PM over something completely stupid and irrelevant. My partner had an out of character reaction, offering support, insight and understanding for the first time ever. My own reaction to the breakdown was also different- I felt like crying rather than reacting with rage. That’s also a first and I feel it’s very important, even if I cannot explain why. 

Before I even start listening, I can tell this is going to be quite an exciting ride. 

I have high hopes that this program will give my life a big push in the right direction. No, truth is I hope it’s going to turn my life around. I know it would be best to have no expectations but the bottom line is, I cannot do it this time. I will be patient however, go with the flow, and let whatever happens happen with flexibility and an open mind. And I will stick to the whole program religiously no matter what, I hereby promise it to myself and I’m asking all of you to please kick my a$$ real hard if I ever mention that I want to quit. I already pre-purchased the whole program and wrote down the listening schedule in my calendar for the whole of stage 1. 

I have no idea how often I will write journal entries, it will depend on how the results unfold mainly.

Ready for take-off
Off we go

August 11, 2020 : Stage 1 / Day 1

Good on you.  I don't think you'll want to quit, though - this sub already feels quite amazing!

(08-11-2020, 05:29 PM)RTBoss Wrote: [ -> ]Good on you.  I don't think you'll want to quit, though - this sub already feels quite amazing!

Thanks man, I am very excited about it. Maybe I’ll have something to report tomorrow already.

Crying instead of rage means you're releasing what you would normally hold on to that would usually result in rage. It's a great sign of real healing.

(08-11-2020, 05:34 PM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]Crying instead of rage means you're releasing what you would normally hold on to that would usually result in rage.  It's a great sign of real healing.

Oh, thank you for the insight Shannon, it means a lot to me. I knew deep down that it meant something important but I didn’t know what. I am this close to crying now 

If TID alone does this, the coming days/weeks/months will be very interesting.

Whenever you feel the urge to cry when using this program, find a way and/or place to let yourself do so. It will make things go much faster.

Forgot to mention: I will listen to U.S. FLAC at night either from an iPad Pro strategically placed behind my head (it has stereo speakers) or plugging my iPhone into cheap-ish speakers placed on either side of my pillow. I won’t have perfect stereophonic exposure because I tend to sleep on my side but I believe it’s a good setup.

(08-11-2020, 07:30 PM)fab10 Wrote: [ -> ]Forgot to mention: I will listen to U.S. FLAC at night either from an iPad Pro strategically placed behind my head (it has stereo speakers) or plugging my iPhone into cheap-ish speakers placed on either side of my pillow. I won’t have perfect stereophonic exposure because I tend to sleep on my side but I believe it’s a good setup.

Having your speakers on ether side of your pillow, facing each other, will give you a near perfect stereophonic experience even if your ears are not oriented directly towards them.

(08-12-2020, 04:36 AM)Shannon Wrote: [ -> ]

(08-11-2020, 07:30 PM)fab10 Wrote: [ -> ]Forgot to mention: I will listen to U.S. FLAC at night either from an iPad Pro strategically placed behind my head (it has stereo speakers) or plugging my iPhone into cheap-ish speakers placed on either side of my pillow. I won’t have perfect stereophonic exposure because I tend to sleep on my side but I believe it’s a good setup.

Having your speakers on ether side of your pillow, facing each other, will give you a near perfect stereophonic experience even if your ears are not oriented directly towards them.

Oh, that’s perfect then. Thank you very much.

I listened during the night. Did not sleep well at all, partly because before falling asleep I had realized that the player inexplicably stopped playing the first track. It had never happened before, either the universe was conspiring against me or, more likely, my subconscious was.

Between the actual effect of the sub and my frequent checking on the player, it was a rather miserable night. 

I woke up at my usual time however, and so far I have not been tired, on the contrary, I was more motivated and productive than usual. 

This morning I experienced rather strong anxiety, out of nowhere, knotted stomach and all. There was absolutely nothing that could justify such anxiety. Because of that and because I needed DRS to fire up in preparation for calling the most toxic person in the world, I played one loop. It reduced the anxiety significantly and made my toxic interlocutor hang up on me. That won’t count against my 7 loops I will run tonight of course, I just needed a quick boost. 

Now I think about it, the same toxic person never hang up on me when I was playing stand-alone DRS. I wonder how different this version of DRS is. I feel a calm but unshakable ’do not f* with me’ energy. Would that make sense Shannon?

Finally, I know I have a terrible posture but I am usually not aware of it. This morning, when I stood up, I was physically aware that my posture was bad and I felt the need to improve it. 

Tonight will be
August 12, 2020 : Stage 1 / Day 2

There is always a reason for anxiety. It's just a matter of how much the conscious mind is aware of that reason.

The build and scripting methods in use in OF and LTU6 are very, very powerful, as you all are noticing. DRS is part of the skeleton script, and therefore gets affected by all of the parts of the program designed to make everything more powerful as well. And I haven't even finished optimizing the skeleton script for this new scripting method yet. Imagine that.

Last night I suddenly had an intuition, later confirmed by factual information - the speakers I use for nightly listening are not good enough for ultrasonic. Since I have used those speakers for three months (not for all listening and not always for ultrasonic thankfully) without figuring that out, I attribute my sudden realization to LTU.

My body is mildly itching in several places, I haven’t eaten any new food or used medication or changed soap, it might well be a result of LTU as well (detox I assume.)

My mood seems to slightly improving.

Today’s listening will be
August 13th, Stage 1, Day 3

(08-13-2020, 09:41 AM)fab10 Wrote: [ -> ]Last night I suddenly had an intuition, later confirmed by factual information - the speakers I use for nightly listening are not good enough for ultrasonic. Since I have used those speakers for three months (not for all listening and not always for ultrasonic thankfully) without figuring that out, I attribute my sudden realization to LTU.

My body is mildly itching in several places, I haven’t eaten any new food or used medication or changed soap, it might well be a result of LTU as well (detox I assume.)

My mood seems to slightly improving.

Today’s listening will be
August 13th, Stage 1, Day 3

Yes, i notice alot of itching aswell, seems like something is going on !

(08-13-2020, 11:10 AM)Ryu Wrote: [ -> ]

(08-13-2020, 09:41 AM)fab10 Wrote: [ -> ]Last night I suddenly had an intuition, later confirmed by factual information - the speakers I use for nightly listening are not good enough for ultrasonic. Since I have used those speakers for three months (not for all listening and not always for ultrasonic thankfully) without figuring that out, I attribute my sudden realization to LTU.

My body is mildly itching in several places, I haven’t eaten any new food or used medication or changed soap, it might well be a result of LTU as well (detox I assume.)

My mood seems to slightly improving.

Today’s listening will be
August 13th, Stage 1, Day 3

Yes, i notice alot of itching aswell, seems like something is going on !

Can confirm, massive itching, lol.